Episode Transcript
[00:00:05] Speaker A: Yeah. So, yeah, the dude. It's a little gross, like, putting the fucking mic on, but I don't think about it as much as I should.
[00:00:10] Speaker B: Right?
[00:00:11] Speaker A: I think that I'm like. I don't know.
[00:00:13] Speaker B: You don't get cold sores, do you?
[00:00:15] Speaker A: I do get cold sores.
It's fucking nasty. It's nasty, but I love it. I'm not gonna, like. If I have a cold sore, I'm not gonna, like, fucking, you know, kiss the mic. But they're dudes who, like. Who, like, do, like, weird shit. Like, if they're, like, you know, faking a blowjob or something, you know, on.
[00:00:31] Speaker B: The mic, put their whole shit on it.
[00:00:32] Speaker A: I mean, you see? I mean, I'm sure you've seen it.
[00:00:34] Speaker B: I've seen that. I just. I don't know. I assumed that, like, you know, they wipe it after or something.
[00:00:38] Speaker A: No, no, during COVID they probably did, but I don't.
[00:00:41] Speaker B: Fuck it. I got you.
[00:00:43] Speaker A: But, yeah, man.
[00:00:43] Speaker C: People.
[00:00:43] Speaker A: I don't think people really give a shit that much. It's like, you know what? I'm just happy that someone, like, people are willing to listen.
[00:00:49] Speaker B: Okay. Yeah.
[00:00:50] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:00:51] Speaker B: There you go. What else is new with you, man? It's been, like, a month and a half, two months since we chilled.
[00:00:54] Speaker A: Been a while since we've chilled. It's been a while since I've done this shit.
[00:00:57] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:00:57] Speaker B: When was the last time?
[00:00:59] Speaker A: October.
[00:01:00] Speaker B: October.
[00:01:00] Speaker A: Yeah. The thing is, I was moving, and I started, like, losing my fucking mind a little bit. Like, just not doing anything but working. And I kind of.
[00:01:08] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:01:08] Speaker A: Yo, things got a little. Little fucking dark. But according me.
[00:01:11] Speaker B: Grinder.
[00:01:12] Speaker A: Yeah, dude, the fucking day to day, like, you just go to work, come home, go to work, come home. It's so weird. Every day when I'm making coffee, and I'm sure you feel like this, but I'm, like, pushing the button on my coffee. I. I close the lid, close the door, go outside, go to work. It's like this.
[00:01:29] Speaker C: This.
[00:01:30] Speaker A: Like I'm like a robot.
[00:01:31] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:01:31] Speaker A: Every day, boom, coffee, boom, door, boom. Walk in, put my shit down, cook, go to sleep. It's after the last couple years that I had because, you know, they were a little hectic. It's very strange for me to have, like, this, like, routine. Yeah. Life is almost a little boring, which is not good.
[00:01:49] Speaker B: Uh, if you're in a routine that's productive, it could be really good. But, yeah, if you're not feeling it. I'm very anti routine. Like, I'm weird like that. Like, I don't, like, I, I deliberately stay away from routine. Like, I mean, like, I do my shit. I'm consistent. Yeah, but nothing is. My Mondays and Tuesdays don't look the same. Every week is not the same thing. And if I notice I'm doing the same thing over and over again, I have to purposely pur, purposefully, whatever the word is, do something else.
[00:02:14] Speaker C: Yeah, yeah.
[00:02:14] Speaker B: Just for the sake of doing something else.
[00:02:17] Speaker A: I, yes, yes. But then it's, then it comes time, like when you're, you're so much in the routine that like when it comes to do something else, you don't want to just kind of, I'm like, I'm like, I'm fucking tired. Yeah, I'm tired. And then you're like, I will do that thing. And then the day comes and then you do part of your routine. Like, okay, like Saturday I'll wake up, I'll go to the gym.
[00:02:35] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:02:36] Speaker A: You know, come home, do some cleaning.
[00:02:38] Speaker C: Mm hmm.
[00:02:38] Speaker A: And then, you know, and I wake up early on the weekends, I'm fucking exhausted. And I'm like, let me just sit down for a few minutes. And then few minutes turns into doom scrolling for like 6 hours.
[00:02:47] Speaker B: And the doom scrolling, my girl makes her phone black and white. She's doing her for like a year.
[00:02:55] Speaker A: Okay, how do you do that?
[00:02:56] Speaker B: There's this, there's a setting. There's a setting.
[00:02:58] Speaker C: Okay.
[00:02:58] Speaker B: We could find it if we try it, I'm sure. But dude, like, it's so much less like, you know, stimulating. You kind of just honor you scroll and you're a little bored before you know it. I haven't tried it myself cuz I'm, you know, I just need my phone, dude.
[00:03:13] Speaker A: That's like I need to do drugs. Like I don't know if I need it.
[00:03:17] Speaker B: No, like legit, dude. Like I feel like I scroll twitter all day, but, you know, I'm, I'm like a little amateur investor and just nice to know what the market is doing. I don't want to be less engaged with Twitter because that's what, that's what's happening. Like people buying and selling, they're on Twitter talking about what they're buying and so I want to be aware of why they're doing it.
[00:03:34] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:03:34] Speaker B: And it keeps me more engaged to have color on my phone. That's all rationalizing it anyway. And it makes sense, you know, you.
[00:03:39] Speaker A: Sound like a crock and crack.
[00:03:42] Speaker B: You sound like, no, I'm telling you.
[00:03:45] Speaker A: Man, I need to gamble. Like it keeps me sharp.
[00:03:49] Speaker B: Well, listen, there's good gambling and bad gambling. Like, I remember when I was doing vaccinations, just like, 50 year old chick told me she goes to ac, like, every weekend. She plays the slots. Old ladies love the slots.
[00:03:58] Speaker A: Yo, the slots. There was a video I saw.
[00:04:01] Speaker C: Whatever.
[00:04:02] Speaker A: Go on. I'll tell you after.
[00:04:03] Speaker B: I think I'm pretty much done. Like, I mean, I was gonna say there's good gambling and bad gambling. Good gambling is when you are accurately gauging your risk.
[00:04:11] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:04:11] Speaker B: And being profitable or doing the thing, like, getting the benefit that you want, the risky behavior. Bad gambling is, like, you suck at, you know, managing risk, and you fucking lose money or you lose whatever thing you're trying to.
[00:04:22] Speaker A: I don't know. What you do is different. I don't. I don't refer to that as gambling. Like, I'm talking about, like, hitting the casino and being like, there's no way to manage risk at a blackjack table.
[00:04:31] Speaker B: If you could count cards, there is.
[00:04:33] Speaker A: Yeah, but who would. It would be fucking rain man.
[00:04:35] Speaker B: Like, you need to be rain man to do it. I'd really think there's, like. If you just understand statistics to some intuitive way, you can do it. But that's the thing. Most people think, like, oh, you got to be rain man. You got to be a fucking genius. So that's where your edge is. If you could, like, get past the. The. You know, the. The limitations we all put on ourselves. Like, yo, doesn't take a genius to do some impressive shit.
[00:04:54] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah.
[00:04:55] Speaker B: I'm just saying. Do I sound like even more of a crackhead?
[00:04:57] Speaker A: Okay.
No, but you sound like every casino's dream. Like, this is the guy we want.
[00:05:04] Speaker B: It's funny. I hate gambling. I do not gamble.
[00:05:06] Speaker C: I hate it.
[00:05:06] Speaker A: I never gamble.
[00:05:07] Speaker B: I don't. I love watching fights. I don't gamble on UFC. I gamble on nothing. It ruins the experience for me, dude.
[00:05:12] Speaker A: You know, I know myself. If I gamble, it's gonna be a bad, bad day. Like, one. One. I don't have enough money where I'm like, okay to lose any of it. Which I guess gamblers don't even think that far ahead, but depends if they're.
[00:05:24] Speaker B: Gamble holics or not.
[00:05:25] Speaker A: Well, that's the thing. I. Yo, I'm like, I don't want to. I don't even know how. I mean, I know how to play blackjack, and I understand poker to a certain extent, but not enough where I could go sit confidently, and I don't want to do that. Yeah, I'm like, I don't.
I know if I win, I'll like it. I've played. I've been in Vegas. I played, but I was also fucking hammered. I also.
[00:05:47] Speaker B: You won.
[00:05:48] Speaker A: I don't even remember. I was 18 when I was very young.
[00:05:50] Speaker B: I feel that.
[00:05:51] Speaker A: But, like, the thing that, like. And this sounds disgusting with doing, like, if you're doing drugs, like, okay, you have drug addicts and gamblers.
[00:05:59] Speaker C: Right?
[00:05:59] Speaker B: Right.
[00:06:00] Speaker A: A gambler. There's no. I understand. It's in the thrill. Like, that's the high. But there's no guarantee you're going to win. You understand, right? If I do drugs, I know I'm gonna get high. That's why I'm like, I understand that more than the gambling because I'm like, I don't. I don't want that. The low will come tomorrow for the. You know, if I'm.
[00:06:20] Speaker B: If I'm partying, or it'll just never come because you died.
[00:06:23] Speaker A: Exactly. You die of fentanyl, which is, you know, win for some.
[00:06:27] Speaker B: You're not even aware that you lost.
Go to sleep forever and you're good to go.
[00:06:32] Speaker A: No. Yeah, but gambling. There was a video I saw of a woman sitting at a slot. I think Joe Rogan posted it sitting at the slots, and she was just pissing in the seat while she was on herself, just like, as if I was sitting here and I just started taking a leak and just didn't want to get up from the slots. Wild. Wild. And she was, like, a good looking, normal.
[00:06:53] Speaker B: A good looking, normal woman.
[00:06:54] Speaker A: She seemed totally normal.
[00:06:55] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:06:55] Speaker A: She was like a young lady, not like some old broad with a catheter.
[00:06:58] Speaker B: That sounds, like method.
[00:07:00] Speaker C: It's not good, dude.
[00:07:01] Speaker A: She totally was unfazed by it.
[00:07:02] Speaker B: I was like, yeah, it's math, dude. It must be.
[00:07:04] Speaker A: You think so?
[00:07:05] Speaker B: If you just abandon all. If you just reckless. A man don't give a fuck about yourself. That sounds like a drug.
[00:07:09] Speaker A: Liam Neeson does it. There's, like, pictures of him, like, where he just pisses himself.
[00:07:14] Speaker B: What?
[00:07:14] Speaker A: That's what I've heard.
[00:07:15] Speaker C: I.
[00:07:16] Speaker A: Look, I'm not, you know, I'm not his agent or his man.
[00:07:18] Speaker B: What context did you see him pissing himself in?
[00:07:20] Speaker A: Like, he gets fucked up and pisses himself. Like, they're pictures with fans. I don't know if he does it as, like, a gag, but he literally, like, there's pictures of him, like, with the fans, and he's just piss all over himself.
[00:07:31] Speaker B: Oh, my God.
[00:07:31] Speaker A: Which is kind of funny if it's for, like, a laughing purposes. But it's not funny if it's old age.
[00:07:36] Speaker B: Sounds like someone kidnapped. That man's dignity is taken from self respect. Taken from him. That's what's up, dude.
[00:07:44] Speaker A: It's terrible. I mean, I don't know if I were to make it. Probably. I probably do some shit like that.
[00:07:49] Speaker B: Maybe it's a good thing you don't make it.
[00:07:52] Speaker A: Be bad for everybody. Be fucking bad for everybody.
[00:07:55] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:07:56] Speaker B: First you have to fucking go through the fire, huh? To see that you don't want to go back, dude, when you do make it.
[00:08:01] Speaker A: Yeah, man. Like, do you ever have that feeling when you're, like, you want money, you want to be fucking, you know, be able to do whatever you want, but you also wonder, like, wow, I could. I could seriously see myself going off the rails, dude.
[00:08:12] Speaker B: For a long time, I've wanted to make a lot of money to see if I really love the career I'm in.
[00:08:17] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:08:18] Speaker B: Like, for a long time, I'm thinking, no, psychiatry is everything. Like, I just. I love looking at what the fuck field and helping people with those problems and shit.
[00:08:23] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:08:23] Speaker B: Another conflicting thought about having said, oh, if I made mad money, what I still want to do it. Like, that's how you really know if you love some shit. If you're balling out of control and you still want to do the job, that's when, you know, I think I would still want to do the job. And, no, I don't think I. It depends on how you get it, right? Like, my pops, one of the smart, crazy men, but one of the smartest things he's ever said is he is terrified of losing, of winning the lottery. That's why he doesn't play. Be his worst nightmare if you ever won the lottery.
[00:08:49] Speaker A: I mean, chances are he never will.
[00:08:51] Speaker B: But. But we were talk. We're in that thread, and he was like, oh, God forbid I ever win the lottery. I never want to play. It's just, you know, you never know what could happen, what you do with all that money when it comes into your lap. You know, you didn't earn it. It's, uh.
[00:09:02] Speaker A: You could lose your shit. You could just end up, like, fucking end up with just totally losing your mind.
[00:09:06] Speaker B: Yeah. A lot of drugs will come to the equation if you're that kind of guy.
[00:09:09] Speaker A: Drugs, definitely.
[00:09:11] Speaker B: Whatever your vice is, you're gonna fucking ten exit. Like, you're gonna just triple down on that shit, and then God knows what happens next, you know what I mean? Because you're trying to get some reward. You're trying to get some. Some dopamine, some satisfaction, because, like, the money's already good. Like, you're good.
[00:09:23] Speaker C: Like, yeah.
[00:09:23] Speaker B: Usually most of our struggle is about money or, you know, attracting whoever we're. We want to attract. You knock one of those off, what you got left? Like, you got your vices, you got your joys, and you got, you know, chasing whatever sex you're into. So it's kind of like, whatever sex.
[00:09:37] Speaker A: You'Re into also with, like, when you have that kind of money, dude, like, especially, you see what's going on with, like, diddy.
[00:09:43] Speaker B: Yeah, I vaguely know about it. I just saw, like, some headlines.
[00:09:46] Speaker A: Like, when you make that kind of money, you learn yours. The sex you're into before you make that money is very different than after. I mean, I'm not. I wouldn't know, but it seems to me that whenever people just hit that billion, they billion end up. Or hundreds of millions, whatever. Like, really a lot of money.
[00:10:02] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:10:03] Speaker A: Like, Epstein, Diddy, R. Kelly, musk looks good so far.
[00:10:06] Speaker B: A lot of rich. But the thing is that he also.
[00:10:08] Speaker A: Named his kids, like, yeah, weird and shit. He's fucked up too, but it's not ruining their lives.
[00:10:14] Speaker B: It's weird. They're probably gonna give themselves some nicknames, but it's not like, no, if you're.
[00:10:19] Speaker A: Naming your kids fucked up names, that's fine. Like, compared to human trafficking, it's definitely. Yeah, a lot better.
[00:10:24] Speaker B: What, uh. Like, what do you know about that? What did he do? What did he do so bad?
[00:10:27] Speaker A: I don't know. Apparently there was a couple women that came out. Cassie.
[00:10:32] Speaker B: Oh, she's a singer.
[00:10:33] Speaker A: Yes. I did some work for her in LA. As, like, a task rabbit.
[00:10:36] Speaker B: No way.
[00:10:36] Speaker A: I did a couple things first. She's very nicely.
[00:10:38] Speaker B: Might have told me about that. Okay.
[00:10:39] Speaker C: Yeah, yeah. And.
[00:10:40] Speaker A: And so what? She came out, said he was, like, sexually abusing her and shit. How so?
[00:10:45] Speaker B: Like, gravy.
[00:10:46] Speaker C: Ah.
[00:10:46] Speaker A: Putting her in, like, sexual positions that she did not want to be in. I don't know if it was like, gang bangs or whatever. I don't know. I don't know exactly. I just know it was, like, abusive.
[00:10:54] Speaker B: Like, to get to. For her to be able to make it, she had to do that kind of shit.
[00:10:57] Speaker A: No, she was already. She was dating him. She dated him for a while. She made it. Then she started dating diddy, and then, like, apparently it was like a shit show. And at first I was like, I don't know. You know, maybe she's bullied, full of shit. I don't know. And then eventually another girl came out and someone else. And then he paid off cat. Like, he paid people off. Like, he was like. He's like, I fuck this lawsuit. I'll give you whatever you want. Like.
[00:11:18] Speaker B: Like, through official settlements or just like, no.
[00:11:20] Speaker A: No official settlement, Cassie. Yeah, sick. Which, honestly, it was like, okay, you know, he's got enough money where it's like, I don't need to deal with this. Even though you're full of shit, that that's how it could look. Or it could look like you're guilty. Right, right. And then recently, the FBI or one of these federal governments. Oh, Homeland security. Raided two of his houses.
[00:11:38] Speaker C: Yeah. So.
[00:11:39] Speaker A: And he was on the. He left, and then he was on.
[00:11:41] Speaker B: A plane to, like, some caribbean treaty.
[00:11:44] Speaker A: And he just sold off revolt tv, like, all his shares.
[00:11:47] Speaker B: Oh, yeah. Was that his company originally?
[00:11:49] Speaker A: I think he was, like, a major part of it.
[00:11:51] Speaker B: Oh, shit. They find the houses. Anything crazy?
[00:11:53] Speaker C: Nothing.
[00:11:54] Speaker A: I saw a video on TMZ just now where it just showed. It was, like, ransacked. I don't know if they found anything, but they did arrest a guy, this 25 year old dude who is, like, his drug. Diddy's drug mule, apparently.
[00:12:08] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:12:08] Speaker A: Some white 25 year old dude.
[00:12:10] Speaker B: Oh, shit.
[00:12:11] Speaker A: And I don't know what's gonna happen there, but I was reading this, and I'm like, this, like, looking at all of it. It's like, this doesn't look good.
[00:12:18] Speaker B: Did he go Epstein's island? Was he on that list?
[00:12:21] Speaker A: I don't know.
[00:12:22] Speaker B: Must have reinvested like this.
[00:12:23] Speaker A: I would think so. But apparently he may have his own fucking island. I don't know, dude. Like, it does. It looks really fucking bad. There was a lot. And then the Meek mill shit came out that, like, man, meek. He was fucking Meek Mill.
[00:12:35] Speaker B: He was. What do you mean, fucking?
[00:12:36] Speaker A: Like, fucking him like baby Miller fucking. Yeah, that was. It was some shit. Meek Mill was on Twitter saying, like, I fucking love pussy. Like, I fucking Ollie pussy if it's bleeding. And Andrew Scholz made a great joke where he's like, if you're, like, going in like that, like, saying, like, I'll lick the asshole and then the pussy. And I love the pussy so much, it's kind of gay.
[00:12:56] Speaker B: It's overcompensating.
[00:12:57] Speaker A: Yeah, it's like, what are you doing? Just say, I'm not gay or don't say anything. They look at this bullshit. I'm gonna go count my millions.
[00:13:02] Speaker B: How did they find out that Meek Millenn Diddy were smashing there was this.
[00:13:06] Speaker A: Apparently Diddy throws these after. After parties.
[00:13:08] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:13:09] Speaker A: Where, like, weird shit goes on, which I think is where the human trafficking or sex trafficking comes into play.
[00:13:14] Speaker B: It just sounds so outlandish. I mean, did he and Meek Miller fucking, like, what are we talking about?
[00:13:18] Speaker C: He's.
[00:13:18] Speaker A: Diddy has had allegations that he's, like, people have made allegations since, like, the nineties that he's gay.
[00:13:24] Speaker B: Did he sexually abuse McMill as well?
[00:13:26] Speaker A: I don't know.
[00:13:27] Speaker B: I mean, consensual.
[00:13:28] Speaker A: Maybe that's what dreams and nightmares is about. I can't.
[00:13:31] Speaker B: Which one is the dream? Which was the nightmare?
[00:13:32] Speaker A: Well, I mean, that's the thing that's up. You know, it's subjective.
[00:13:35] Speaker B: I just don't see it. But fucking who knows, man?
[00:13:37] Speaker A: I don't know. I mean, I don't wanna, you know, like, I understand. I don't want anyone to fucking lose their life or their career. Like, and I'm a fan of Diddy's musical career.
[00:13:46] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:13:47] Speaker A: I don't want to see anybody, like, be in a position like this. However I look at it and I'm like, hmm.
I'm curious. Like, I'm like, what's going on here?
[00:13:55] Speaker B: I just don't know if he's gay because it's fat. Fascinating.
[00:13:57] Speaker A: It would be wild, right?
[00:13:58] Speaker B: Fascinating. Not that I know. No shader, just fascinating.
[00:14:01] Speaker A: No, of course.
[00:14:01] Speaker B: Would you try some gay shit if.
[00:14:04] Speaker A: Diddy was writing a check? Maybe if I could get, like, a serious check, I.
[00:14:09] Speaker B: Maybe today's logic is like, you should try it to see what you like and what you don't like. Like, what do you think about that?
[00:14:15] Speaker A: Yes, I was. I was in a position actually like that pretty recently.
[00:14:18] Speaker B: In LA.
[00:14:19] Speaker A: No, LA. I had a bunch of situations like that, but I.
[00:14:22] Speaker B: Many positions in LA. Weren't you now?
[00:14:24] Speaker A: I was really. I was in reverse gal girl.
I. I was at. I went to a party with a friend of mine.
[00:14:33] Speaker C: He.
[00:14:33] Speaker A: I was.
[00:14:34] Speaker B: The Bushwick thing?
[00:14:34] Speaker A: Yeah, I told you, gone.
[00:14:36] Speaker B: Maybe they don't. Maybe they want to know where they were.
[00:14:38] Speaker A: It was. It just. I ended up at a party at 430 in the morning, and I was fucked up on God knows what.
[00:14:44] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:14:44] Speaker A: And I got there and I thought it was like, you know, just typical rave in a basement, and it wasn't. It was like gay night. It was like 900 men. Like, imagine, like, the movie 300, but instead of killing everyone, they're fucking everyone. It was banging and, like wild shit. And I was there and I was like, this is my, this is the universe saying, hey, if you're interested in this. You could do this here. They put stickers on your phone so no one takes pictures. And it's like, maybe you're into this.
[00:15:11] Speaker B: And I'm like, so, like, you had that opportunity and you.
[00:15:12] Speaker A: I could have. Are you kidding me? There was dicks out. I could've just grabbed one and went like, hey, so. And I didn't. And I had no. I said to the person I was with who, you know, may or may not be into it.
[00:15:23] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:15:24] Speaker A: And I was like, you know, I gotta tell you, like, I like being in positions where I question, you know, everything.
[00:15:30] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:15:30] Speaker A: And I'm like, I like pussy. I think I went Meek Mill. I was like, I'll eat pussy any day, anywhere.
[00:15:39] Speaker B: But all pussy.
[00:15:40] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:15:41] Speaker A: I'll fucking. I'll beat the pussy up. And I basically was like. It was a. A little, like, okay. I learned something about myself that I knew, but it would just kind of solidify. Right, right.
[00:15:52] Speaker B: I think there's a thought experiment. We can have to know if you're into, like, if you're on your deathbed.
[00:15:56] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:15:56] Speaker B: And you never got a chance to experiment with the same sex.
[00:15:59] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:16:00] Speaker B: Do you regret it?
[00:16:00] Speaker C: Do you.
[00:16:01] Speaker B: Were you. You think there's gonna be an inkling of, like, I wonder what it could have been like if I was with another dude or, you know, if you're a chick with another chick or whatever.
[00:16:08] Speaker A: I don't think I'm gonna have that because I've had so many opportunities where it's, like, mental, wanted to health, and I turned it down.
[00:16:14] Speaker C: Right.
[00:16:14] Speaker A: Think if I really wanted to, I would have just been like, you know what? Fucking try.
[00:16:17] Speaker B: Fucking jump at it.
[00:16:17] Speaker C: Right?
[00:16:18] Speaker B: Oh, because it's not a fuck.
[00:16:19] Speaker C: Yes.
[00:16:19] Speaker B: Then, you know, that's the thing also.
[00:16:21] Speaker A: But even if it's not, and you try, like, you know, that's the other thing. If you try. I've made out with dudes for acting.
[00:16:26] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:16:26] Speaker A: So did every give you butterflies? I.
Maybe if nausea and butterflies are, like, in the same, you know, maybe that's butterflies before you throw up.
[00:16:35] Speaker B: There you go.
[00:16:36] Speaker A: So, no, I mean, I don't think on my deathbed I'm gonna be thinking, I wish I sucked more dicks.
[00:16:43] Speaker B: Or tried one. Not for you. I think I'm on the same wave. I've had a couple opportunities. Not many, but I don't, like, wish I took. I took it upon myself. Like, it's, like, kind of chilling. And also, every time I think about trying to get with the dude, I feel like it's time wasted, not trying to get with a girl. You know what I mean? Like, I just feel like, oh, I'm doing this, but this moment is now occupied, whereas I could have been, you know, shooting my shot with chicks. Like, that's my logic. It's, like, just a misconception.
[00:17:08] Speaker A: Well, it makes sense. I think that's a straight person's logic.
[00:17:11] Speaker B: Yeah, I would think so, too.
[00:17:12] Speaker C: Right?
[00:17:12] Speaker A: Yeah, that's pretty, you know, plus one equals two, you know?
[00:17:18] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:17:19] Speaker B: I mean, listen. Society making you doubt, man. Side of you. Like, try everything if you do.
[00:17:23] Speaker A: But I will say, though, to be in a place like that, I would go back 100%. Like, I wouldn't have any problem. Yo, it's a wild thing to just see.
[00:17:31] Speaker C: It's. It's just. It's.
[00:17:32] Speaker A: It's like, I want to. Freedom.
[00:17:33] Speaker C: It's great.
[00:17:34] Speaker B: I want to see what's up. I like, to me, like, music like that and shit.
[00:17:36] Speaker A: It's Europe, Libra. It's like being in Europe. It's a very odd.
[00:17:40] Speaker C: Love.
[00:17:40] Speaker A: It just different experience. And, like, I would be like, yeah, if someone was gone, I'd go. I probably would not get nearly as fucked up as I was that night because I couldn't even stand. But, yeah, man, I think on your deathbed, you probably.
I mean, people usually say they think about, like, oh, I wish I spent more time with my family and I worked less.
[00:17:59] Speaker B: Right. Anything else I've read, actually, an article that the top five regrets by older people in their deathbed. And it typically does revolve around spending time with certain people.
[00:18:08] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:18:08] Speaker B: Or taking chances or thinking less about what other people think of you.
[00:18:13] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:18:13] Speaker B: Kind of like generic shit that we could all expect. Whatever. It's kind of afraid to admit that they're not doing enough of.
[00:18:19] Speaker A: Yeah, well, I mean, young people are also the latter. They'll be like, yeah, I know, I know, I know. Boy, I got to go. You know, make the bag.
[00:18:25] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:18:25] Speaker B: That shit. It's like, the bag is so important, bro. Oh, my God, dude.
[00:18:30] Speaker A: You know, there are days where I have. Where I'm like, I just need to make money in there. Days where it's like, it'll, you know, if you're doing what you love or you're putting in the time and the effort of what you enjoy, like, this is what I want to be doing, then, you know, I think you're doing the right thing. But then there's that thing of, like, if you had all the money in the world, I don't know if I'd be interested in anything, dude.
[00:18:51] Speaker B: That's the thing, right?
[00:18:52] Speaker A: I don't know. I think.
[00:18:53] Speaker C: I think.
[00:18:53] Speaker A: I mean, I would want to just do this, I think, where I'm just hanging out, shooting the shit. Yeah, but it's a thing. Like, what?
[00:19:00] Speaker B: Does it challenge you? I feel like you're gonna, like, as a human, I think you're gonna want some type of challenge. Like, if this is gonna not do it for you eventually, then you're gonna want to hit it big on the stage, and then once you get a big on the stage, it's gonna move on to acting.
[00:19:10] Speaker C: Like, again.
[00:19:10] Speaker B: I feel like we're just gonna keep, like, what you said just now. Like, some days I want money, some days I want passion. I think it's a feature, not a bug. Yeah, I think that, you know, we have been flow.
[00:19:18] Speaker C: We have.
[00:19:19] Speaker B: We have away from our passion. Yeah, we flow toward our passions there and then, like, even at work, bro, like, you know, I love the psychiatry shit, but. So sometimes it's like, oh, can you just, like, be nice to me? Like, why are you cursing me out? Cause you think I'm the second coming of the devil or some shit like that? Yeah, like, you know what I mean? Like, I just want, like. Although it's amusing sometimes, and it's interesting to, you know, treat the person with the right medical or psychiatric treatment. Like, sometimes, like, you know, I wish you were, like, wish some people were nice to me today. Like, I just don't want it right now, you know, natural ebb and flow.
[00:19:48] Speaker A: But that. The question is, it leads back to, would you show up there on days like that where you wouldn't be treated like shit if it wasn't for the paycheck? Do you show up to. You show up to get paid right now, dude.
[00:19:58] Speaker B: But the thing is, like, I thought about this, and sometimes they even get, like, lobs, like, accusations by patients, like, oh, you're doing it for the money, man. You know? I know you're here for a check. My logic is, like, yo, I'm not a dumb dude. Like, if I wanted straight money, I'd go work on Wall street or something.
[00:20:09] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:20:10] Speaker B: Would have majored in finance. Like, now, this is legit a passion. Like, it's legit a passion. Money is nice.
[00:20:15] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:20:15] Speaker B: And the paycheck I get makes it seem worth it some days. Like, the way I set up my jobs make it feel worth it all the time. But if I only had one full time job, one job in hospital, that's it. It would be tougher, dude.
[00:20:27] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:20:27] Speaker B: Like, less money makes hard work harder, for sure.
[00:20:30] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:20:31] Speaker B: You know what I mean?
[00:20:31] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:20:32] Speaker B: But in the end, like, yo, there's many ways to make money. I'm not like, if you're going into psychiatry to be rich, you little dumb.
[00:20:39] Speaker A: Idiots, like going into acting to get rich, like, yeah, or going to get pussy, it's like, no, it's happen.
[00:20:44] Speaker B: I mean, aside from the fact you could actually make money in psychiatry, that's true.
[00:20:50] Speaker C: Yeah, yeah.
[00:20:50] Speaker A: There's no, make a little more passion.
[00:20:52] Speaker B: It's a little. It's different. Like, there's an art aspect to healthcare, but there's definitely more of a, you know, like, critic, prick, like transactional. Okay, I'm doing you a job. You'll give me money. Whereas in acting, there has to be an any art form. I would say. That's why, like, I always tell you how much, like, I think people who go down the route of chasing their artistic passion for money, like, thinking they can make a career out of it. That takes balls of fucking steel, dude.
[00:21:16] Speaker A: You're an idiot if you do that, though.
[00:21:17] Speaker B: An idiot to the outside world. But here's the magic of it. Like, if you look inside, if you're on your. If on your bed to go to, when you go to sleep at night, you look at yourself, you think about what you're doing with your day, and you still, at the end of the night, think, yo, I know, I got it. And you continue pursuing that balls of steel point blank. Other people call you dumb. I know plenty of people would call you dumb. But in the end, what you're doing is going against the grain. Going against almost like a guaranteed check. If you pursued, like, some more practical field or following what you see inside yourself, you're listening to yourself. That takes, in my opinion, huge brass nads.
[00:21:52] Speaker A: Yeah. But I truly believe that, like. And this is gonna sound so like fucking hippie, you know, garbage, but, like, the. The universe knows. And I hate that I'm saying this, but it's true. I feel it's true.
[00:22:06] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:22:07] Speaker A: That it knows when you're not doing it because it's like, this is fucking.
[00:22:13] Speaker B: Like you're faking it.
[00:22:13] Speaker A: It's just you're not making great art. You know? It's not coming from this, this pure place. And human beings are smart enough and they're their soul. Like, you can really, like, like when you look at an actor, you watch a movie and there's that scene or where, and you're just like, holy shit. Well, you just know it's honest. It's just coming from this fucking human, human place that everyone can relate to. Like, you don't know why, but you're like, yo, this scene is fucking amazing.
[00:22:40] Speaker B: Get chills from it.
[00:22:41] Speaker C: Yeah, yeah.
[00:22:42] Speaker A: And you know, when it's like, when it's shitty acting, you're like, or he's phoning it in, you're like, yeah, or whatever. Let's flip the channel. That's what I mean. Where I think that if you're doing it for the money, you're. You're cutting off that. That in art. In art purposes. Like, you're cutting off that whole, you know, the. The thing that we're all searching for when magic.
[00:23:01] Speaker B: Television magic.
[00:23:01] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:23:02] Speaker A: Or watch a stand up comedian or watch an actor.
[00:23:04] Speaker B: Oh, dude. I think that extends to, like, every field. If you're not doing it because your heart's in it, I think that, like, aside from the universe, just other people. Like you said, people are much more smarter than we all give each other credit for.
[00:23:13] Speaker C: Yeah, yeah.
[00:23:13] Speaker B: Well, let me not say smart. Let me say more intuitive because you're looking at each other, we get a lot of information that we're not privy to.
[00:23:19] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:23:20] Speaker B: Your subconscious is also, like, downloading information that you're not privy to. So when you do something not from the heart, the person you're interacting with, whether you're a nurse or whether you're an artist, the person you are, you know, the outside world that you're expressing yourself to, they're going to tell, and they're going to disrespect you. Like, I've had it. When I was a. I was like a fight stopper in a psych ward for a couple of years, and in the last few months, I was not feeling it. I felt like I was being underestimated by the higher ups. I wanted more, and I wasn't being given more. So my head was out of it before I actually quit for, like, four months. In those four months, I got injured more than I ever have. And you get injured in a psych ward all the time. But, like, when my heart stopped being in it, I was just performing. Not as good, like, psych patients, bro, especially the really hardcore ones. They are, like, they have to. They've honed their intuition to tell when they're being bullshitted because they have. They have to survive on very little. You know, the homeless are just super low socioeconomic status. Like, they're very intuitive, and, like, they could tell that, like, my heart wasn't, and I just felt like I was in the wrong place. And yo, I'd get bugged out on, and when I get bugged out on, I'd be more reactive, and I'd get, like, headbutted, scratched, spit at, like, more. So much higher frequency. I'd be much more of a victim.
[00:24:23] Speaker A: They could feel it when I wanted.
[00:24:24] Speaker B: Out of it, dude. Because aside from, yes, I have, there's the universe piece to it too. But when we hone in, it's just other people picking up on your bullshit, and you're afraid to admit it.
[00:24:33] Speaker C: You know?
[00:24:33] Speaker B: I'm saying that shit's big. That shit's huge. You got why? I also say it takes nuts to know. Like, yo, listen, this isn't what I want. What I really want is to be an actor, go into homeless services. Like, whatever. Like, you have to fucking feel it. It's like this inexplicable, profound, gut, like, magnetic pull toward the thing you need to do.
[00:24:55] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:24:55] Speaker B: And if you. If you disrespect that, the universe and life and other people, they're gonna fucking call you out on it, whether explicitly or implicitly, 100%.
[00:25:03] Speaker A: It just won't. You'll hit more roadblocks along the way. I think just by sheer.
[00:25:08] Speaker B: Just, you know, what else to, like, you're gonna be blind. You're gonna think like, oh, you're not gonna. You're gonna, like, externalize your issues. You're gonna like, I was such an asshole. Oh, you know, these people just don't like Jews or they just don't like this people. They don't like that people like, yo. It's not me, it's them. Like, yo. But when you're really in it, when you love the thing you're doing, you internalize what's happening. You're like, oh, shit.
[00:25:27] Speaker C: Okay.
[00:25:27] Speaker B: That interaction didn't go that I wanted. What could, even if it wasn't my fault, what was, like, what was in my control that I can change even by an inch to reduce the odds that happen, to get nuanced into that way. And that's. That's the vibe of mine. Like, I love my jobs right now so much that any. Any negative thing that happens is always in my mind, always my fault, even if it's not, because I want to see what I can change. So I could, like, increase, even by a millimeter, the odds that I can, you know, do better next time.
[00:25:52] Speaker C: That's.
[00:25:53] Speaker B: That's the vibe. Always do. Always do better.
[00:25:55] Speaker A: Even. Even a fucking little. Always want to do a little better.
[00:25:58] Speaker B: Yeah, towards that.
[00:26:00] Speaker C: It's. It's.
[00:26:01] Speaker A: I don't understand people who. And it's just, I, it's just wild to me because I like to think I'm pretty self aware. But there are people who are just like, like you said, like, they're like, no, it's not me, bro. It's not me. It's them.
[00:26:14] Speaker C: It's this.
[00:26:14] Speaker A: It's that. It's the fucking train was laid. But no, like, not the reason that happened. It's actually not really my fault because, you know, I work or some shit where. And I never understood that. Like, sure, I've had my days, like, fuck this. And then I. But I, deep down, I know I'm in intelligent enough where I'm like, no, I I'm not doing something. Like, when I last couple months where I've just kind of been idle. Like, there's not, like, I could blame it on the job. I could blame it on being back in New York. I could blame it on, you know, being single. I could blame it on a million things, but I. Every day, every night, I was like, no. No. Did you do any writing today? No. You didn't fucking go on? You didn't get up on stage? Like, no. Like, this is completely in your hands. It just means you may have to sleep a little less. And it just means turn off the fucking television that you didn't earn hanging out and watching that show that you really want to watch.
[00:27:03] Speaker C: Fuck you.
[00:27:04] Speaker A: But there are people who are just, like, totally fucking unaware, and you just want to look at them like, dude, you know, you're a fucking idiot. Like, how do you not, like, just for a second, just for a second, even if it's not every day, just go, shit, maybe it's me. You know what I mean? Because it is. I mean, you're, everything that that's fucking in your way is in your control to a certain extent.
[00:27:25] Speaker B: To some extent, yeah. It's not always in your control. Like, but do it. I'll put it this way. Even if it's not in your control.
[00:27:32] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:27:32] Speaker B: You have to pretend like it is so you could actually find what is in your control.
[00:27:36] Speaker A: And it also, what it does is when you do that, you, you get, your attitude changes. Even if it's slightly where you're like, all right, like, this is, this is not the end of the world. And when your attitude starts to shift, you'll think. You'll realize that things are starting to get a little easier, a little more livable, you know, like, rather than going to that job and like, fuck, I don't want to fucking be here.
[00:27:56] Speaker C: Go to the shop.
[00:27:56] Speaker A: And you're like, all right, you know, I'm gonna do the best I can today and really try and just have a different attitude. And that shifts the whole, like, you're. You're on this road, and then you start to. The road starts to get straight again. You're like, ah, okay.
[00:28:09] Speaker C: Fuck. Yeah.
[00:28:09] Speaker A: You know, things clear up things.
[00:28:11] Speaker B: Clarity.
[00:28:11] Speaker A: Like, really?
[00:28:12] Speaker B: Yeah, cuz. Cuz it's like, it just so. It's the path of least resistance, right? To just be like, no, it's not me. That was, that was something else. Wasn't me. I'm the fucking man. What do you mean? Just all these things I've done in my life couldn't be my problem. It couldn't be me. Yeah, I've been doing so good. It must be the patient, the customer, the audience. It's not. What do you mean, me? No way. Like, our egos are so, like, we're trained to think like, yeah, we're trained. Like, they're so sensitive. To really understand that. Like, the ego is going to hold you back from your greatest desires and joys. To really acknowledge that takes, like, deliberate practice. You got to sit there and really acknowledge it. It doesn't come automatic to.
[00:28:47] Speaker A: No, it doesn't. It takes a lot. Like, yo, I'm telling you, man, it's been months I've been sitting around. I'm like, just sort of just being introspective, and my ego comes into play of like, ah. Like, I could do better than that. And it's like, well, bitch, have you been doing anything to show. To prove that? And I'm like, no, I haven't. And then that just. You allow fear to come in the door, and ego sort of, like, puts it under a blanket and it's like, no, no, you're not scared. You're just better. And you don't need to prove it. It's like, no, no, no, you should be scared. Like, you need. It's okay to be. The ego is trying to. Not that I'm sick, I don't fucking know any of them in the psychology field, but from what I understand, that's what's happening.
[00:29:22] Speaker B: It sounds like. So I think you're on the right track. From. From what I understand is that it's more like the, like, you're right.
[00:29:28] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:29:29] Speaker B: I would think of it as, like, the ego is really like, if fear is knocking your door, the ego is like, get the fuck out of here. Get out of here. You leave me, like, getting very defensive. Yeah, whereas when you're, like, more enlightened, the ego will, when you go, is more healthy. When you're a more rounded person, you actually allow the fear to come in and sit on the living room of your mind. Let it sit on the couch.
[00:29:48] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:29:49] Speaker B: You're just like, hello, fear. I see you. I see why. I see why you're here.
[00:29:53] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:29:53] Speaker B: And I also see how to get you out of the door again.
[00:29:56] Speaker A: It's also good to let it stay exactly. Like you should be scared. Like, it's good because you're not gonna be. You're not gonna die.
[00:30:03] Speaker B: Shows you care.
[00:30:04] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:30:04] Speaker A: Yeah, you'll try. I'll be like, you know what? Let's let that fucking thing in. And you'll realize that when you do that thing that's scaring you. It's really not that bad.
[00:30:12] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:30:13] Speaker A: And you're like, fuck, I'm so happy.
[00:30:14] Speaker C: Yeah. Yeah.
[00:30:15] Speaker B: Like, even, like, uh, fear. So I have some recent experience with this, but I'll speak generally just to not.
[00:30:20] Speaker C: Yeah, yeah.
[00:30:20] Speaker B: Um, like, fear in terms of relationships, too, you know, like, when you're. When you meet someone you really like.
[00:30:25] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:30:25] Speaker B: In the beginning, there is, like, a. I think other people feel this, too. Like, this is ounce of fear. You're like, oh, whoa. I feel like I'm, like, falling. Like, I feel like I'm really vulnerable here.
[00:30:34] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:30:34] Speaker A: I know.
[00:30:34] Speaker B: Something happens, like, I'm gonna get hurt hard as fuck.
[00:30:37] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:30:37] Speaker B: So I got to be very, like, trepidatious. You know, I gotta, like, watch out, watch my step. Let's see what's going on. Like, wear my helmet, my knee pads, everything.
[00:30:44] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:30:44] Speaker B: And so what does that mean? I mean, that means that you value it. It means you fear things that when means about you. Exactly.
[00:30:51] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:30:52] Speaker B: You feel like fear comes into play only when you care about the thing that you're afraid of.
[00:30:55] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:30:55] Speaker A: You're not gonna be.
[00:30:56] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:30:56] Speaker A: You know, if you don't give a shit about it. Fucking. You're not scared of it.
[00:30:59] Speaker B: Fuck, yeah. Do you get that to the fear?
[00:31:01] Speaker A: Oh, yeah. I mean, I haven't had in a very long time. That's the other thing. I I've had it before where I'm like, oh, no, this is fucked up. I had this all set up here. Then you came in and brought your fucking game in. And I want to play that game, too. And.
[00:31:17] Speaker C: But.
[00:31:17] Speaker A: But I had this all set up. It looked really fucking good.
[00:31:20] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:31:21] Speaker A: And it's a. It's a very, very, very frightening thing. But also, as I got older, I kind of just, I I've gotten better with that fear, with relationship fear, because I'm. I guess I've had major successes with it and major failures with it, whereas with my.
My professional life, there hasn't been so much, you know?
And it's only. It's been mostly. I mean, it depends how you define success. Also, like, I've tried a lot, which is great, right? But it's not, like, the way the relationships are. So when someone. Someone comes into my life that's new, and I feel that I'm like, this is good. Like, let's see what happens. I'm kind of just chiller.
[00:32:02] Speaker C: Yeah. Yeah.
[00:32:03] Speaker A: I also got to pay the bills. I can't sit around and cry all day, but, yeah, dude, it's a wild thing when people. When you meet somebody. I haven't met someone in a long time, right. And it's. It's almost.
It's nice. I'm like, I got my shit. No one's touching my shit. I got my fucking, you know, I jerk off when I want, and I do whatever I want, and. But it's also I I think to myself, like, damn, what would that even be? Like, I forgot, like.
[00:32:29] Speaker B: Like, if someone was new, someone new.
[00:32:31] Speaker A: Came in, and it's like, oh, see, you know what I mean? I totally am, like, in my own right now.
[00:32:36] Speaker B: In your life, do you think that it would be more of a burden, or do you think maybe it could enliven you to chase your passion?
[00:32:42] Speaker A: Probably. I had an acting teacher who told me he's like, the best work will come when you're in love and when.
[00:32:49] Speaker B: You'Re heartbroken, when you're, like, feeling intensity.
[00:32:52] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:32:52] Speaker A: When you're like, fuck, this is amazing.
[00:32:53] Speaker B: If you mean when you're in the honeymoon phase or when you're, like, you know, deep in your relationship and love.
[00:32:58] Speaker A: No, no, no. I think. I think. I mean, maybe deep in love, but, like, I also think the honeymoon phase is super important. You know, that's the time where new shit's happening. Like, eventually one or two years down the road in the relationship. Not saying it gets bad, but, you know, you sort of, like, you're complacent.
[00:33:12] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:33:12] Speaker A: You're fitting, right? Like, okay, we're doing my thing, we're doing yours, and you're inspiring each other, but not. You're not firing, like, on that same, like.
[00:33:20] Speaker B: Like, that emotional valence.
[00:33:21] Speaker A: Like, this. This is all new still.
[00:33:23] Speaker B: That's what kind of bugs me out, dude, about, like, love and shit. You know? If we're all meant to fall in love and then hopefully have, like, a long term relationship. I mean, what the fuck happens to it? So much deep. What happens to the relationship. So be deep in that. It's like a stereotype that, you know, they start. That the couple starts fighting and it becomes this, like, married with children type of antagonistic relationship. Like, it kind of worries me. It's like, should we avoid it then? Should we just hop from honeymoon phase to honeymoon phase? It's like a mind fuck, you know? I don't know.
[00:33:50] Speaker A: I was like, should we maybe just never feel anything?
[00:33:54] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:33:55] Speaker A: Well, I mean, I come from a very odd parent. Like, parent. Like, the relationship that my parents has is so fucking talk.
[00:34:01] Speaker B: Oh, mine too, dude.
[00:34:02] Speaker A: So I don't, like, I look at that and I'm like, this is a terrible example. What I've seen is not what should be. Yeah, but I mean, it's like anything else. Like, you start a new job. Like, yes, this is what I've always. I want to work in this law.
[00:34:16] Speaker C: What I want to.
[00:34:16] Speaker A: I want to, you know, you know, the justice, whatever. I'm just using that as an example.
And eventually, years down the line, you're like, shit, things are kind of fucking corrupt. Like, maybe I can't make a difference.
[00:34:28] Speaker B: Oh, she's saying you get disillusioned relationship.
[00:34:30] Speaker C: Yes.
[00:34:30] Speaker A: And then.
And that's when you fucking leave.
[00:34:34] Speaker C: No.
[00:34:34] Speaker A: And that's when you have to go. That's when people say, relationship is work.
[00:34:38] Speaker C: Where you have to go.
[00:34:38] Speaker A: Like, you have to fight for it. You have to, like, figure, okay, I'm here because I love you. And, you know, we had a fight. But that doesn't mean it's the end of the world. Like, I went to work and I had a bad day or I lost this case. It's not the end of the world. Like, I came here for a larger purpose, and that's to be with you or be, you know what I mean? So it's work.
[00:34:54] Speaker B: It gives you, like, a solid grounding, I feel like. But there's this, like, I don't know. I just feel like they're mad artist examples where when they fall in love, like, they kind of lose their edge. Like Charles Bukowski. Like, I have literally a book on love poems by him and there's not a single actual love poem.
[00:35:09] Speaker C: It's just.
[00:35:10] Speaker B: It's just him getting with mad floozies and like, yeah, he fucking. But he fucked a lot. But he also, like, he tended to fall in love with, like, prostitutes. And he would talk about the.
[00:35:20] Speaker A: I know people who've done that.
[00:35:22] Speaker B: We both do, Harry. We both do, believe me. But the thing is, like, his, his. It's not even his best work. His only work has come as a result of, you know, being in this, like, fake love that he acknowledges as fake, but that he also acknowledges of his own doing. Because whenever a decent girl shows him that she's down, he says, oh, basically a lot of his lines are, like, around, like, something to the effect of, oh, but she could never understand the. I need my regulars and his regulars being his prosthetics. Yeah, it's horse.
[00:35:53] Speaker A: It's kind of tough to understand, you know, if I was somebody's wife and I'm like, what do you mean? You need your regulars, sweetie.
[00:36:00] Speaker B: These are like new flames that, like, they're decent chicks who, you know, the strong burnout.
[00:36:04] Speaker A: You know what I mean? Like, yeah, so I love Bukowski. He's got a great quote. That's like, when you come home at night and you could at any point in the night and no one's waiting.
[00:36:17] Speaker B: For you, is it freedom or is it loneliness?
[00:36:19] Speaker A: Freedom or loneliness? And I. Right now I'm like, it's fucking freedom, bro. But there are moments I have, like, shit, maybe this is. This is kind of sad. All my friends, like, their wives call them, like, hey, I need you to come home. It's fucking 01:00 in the morning. And I'm sitting there going, what do you mean? We gotta go home. Fucking having the best time ever. And then I wake up alone the next day. The fucking anxiety is through the roof.
However, artists I've noticed, I mean, I've had situations like this where it's also like, they create the muse. Like, some great musicians have made some of their best work because of, like, a muse. This person, like, Bob Dylan's one, I think it was his first record. The album covers him and his girlfriend on the front. And, like, he inspired. She inspired that whole album.
[00:37:00] Speaker B: Still together?
[00:37:01] Speaker A: No, Bob Dylan.
[00:37:03] Speaker B: Oh, he's not. He's dead?
[00:37:04] Speaker A: No, he's alive.
[00:37:05] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:37:05] Speaker B: Oldest together anymore.
[00:37:06] Speaker A: No.
[00:37:06] Speaker C: What? Are you kidding?
[00:37:07] Speaker A: He's fucking. That's the thing, though. Like, you create this. I think every. Maybe. I don't know if it's just artists or people, but, like, you know, you need sort of that temporary thing because it's just. It's almost like a drug dude.
[00:37:18] Speaker B: There are some pretty, like, significant examples of people staying in long term relationships and doing great. Exhibit a. Warren Buffett. One woman, like, literally dozens of years.
[00:37:27] Speaker A: I have a question for you, though.
[00:37:28] Speaker B: Go ahead.
[00:37:29] Speaker A: Has Warren Buffett ever written like a rolling stone or has Warren Buffett ever written a. No one wants to fuck Warren Buffett.
[00:37:38] Speaker B: That's better. A better art example. Ryan Reynolds. Boom. Him and Blake killing it. And he looks jet when you see him in interviews. My man looks.
[00:37:45] Speaker A: He looks very happy.
[00:37:46] Speaker B: Happy.
[00:37:46] Speaker A: Okay.
[00:37:47] Speaker B: He's killing it.
[00:37:48] Speaker A: I want you to name me one more person with someone as hot as Blake Lively, which is so shitty of me to say, but I don't give a fuck.
[00:37:55] Speaker B: George Clooney. He must have.
[00:37:56] Speaker A: I think he was fucking for fucking 30 years. Every acid he could find. And then he finally. He started looking in the mirror, and he went, getting a little old. I'm gonna find this one girl who's.
[00:38:06] Speaker C: Who's.
[00:38:07] Speaker A: Okay.
[00:38:07] Speaker B: Howard Stern. Howard Stern. Same wife since 25 years before that long term relationship with his baby moms.
[00:38:15] Speaker A: I think it's different. I think Howard Stern also is very self conscious. He's always like.
[00:38:19] Speaker C: He's very.
[00:38:20] Speaker A: He's always said he's like, I'm like, I'm not good looking, crazy, obsessed.
[00:38:23] Speaker B: Crazy OCD.
[00:38:23] Speaker A: Yeah, crazy OCD where it's like, yo, if you're a beetle, like fucking Paul McCartney, which I know he's had marriages where he was very happy. Yeah, like, I'm not saying it. You know, there's fucking girls knocking down the door. It's very hard.
[00:38:39] Speaker B: But just because you.
[00:38:40] Speaker C: Just.
[00:38:40] Speaker B: Cause you can, um. Just because you could press the coke water, you know, like the rat in the.
Pressing the coke water button, just cuz you could do that doesn't mean you're gonna like it. Like, you do it enough, and then you need more. And what if more isn't enough and then you can't get to, like, there's literally no more. You can press on. And it's just like, I'm just, like, doing this now because I'm kind of bored and nothing else excites me. You know what I mean? Same logic.
More women.
[00:39:03] Speaker C: More women. More women.
[00:39:04] Speaker B: More women. More women. More women.
[00:39:06] Speaker C: All right.
[00:39:06] Speaker B: More women.
[00:39:07] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:39:08] Speaker A: You kind of feel. You know, I get that. I'm just trying to. I'm just saying that when you use Warren Buffet, the guy that no girl has ever said they wanted to fucking, like, I mean, come on.
[00:39:17] Speaker B: But he has a lot of money. I mean, he's been.
[00:39:19] Speaker C: Doesn't matter. Years.
[00:39:20] Speaker A: It doesn't matter. I guess he has a lot of money. But you're talking about someone that's. That is incredibly wealthy, but is not in the limelight, like, yeah.
[00:39:30] Speaker B: Hear that?
[00:39:31] Speaker A: You know, they're not like.
[00:39:32] Speaker B: They don't have that. That fog.
[00:39:34] Speaker A: They're not, like, swooned over. Like, imagine someone. You walk out of your door, everyone wants to fuck you. Everyone tells you're great.
[00:39:39] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:39:39] Speaker A: No one does that. The only people that do that to Warren Buffett are the anchors on cuz, CNN and Fox. Like, no one's. You know what I mean? Like, it's. It fucks with your head.
[00:39:47] Speaker B: I feel like if Warren Buffett was a young guy with that much money, even, like, a middle aged guy with that money, he walks into a party, plenty of chicks who are like, hey, you know what I'm saying? Can I guess?
[00:39:56] Speaker A: Yeah, I guess. But I just think if you used anybody else but Warren Buffett, I'd be like, I get it.
[00:40:01] Speaker B: I feel that, like, a younger, good looking person. I mean, I don't know. It depends, I think, on how emotionally healthy you are. If I can say I feel like I want to make the generalization, I'm probably wrong, but I want to make it. Yeah, maybe. Like, the people who are, generally speaking, satisfied with less, they're a little better, emotionally adjusted one.
[00:40:16] Speaker A: Better being.
[00:40:17] Speaker B: Not to say that, you know, a significant. A long term significant other is less, but it is, you know, in quantity, less people that you deal with when you hone in on one and you develop something for the long term. You sound like a more emotionally adjusted person to me.
[00:40:30] Speaker A: I think.
[00:40:31] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:40:31] Speaker A: If you're fucking everything that walks emotionally, you're a little off, you know, probably.
[00:40:34] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:40:34] Speaker A: You know, but it's.
[00:40:37] Speaker C: It's.
[00:40:38] Speaker A: It's not. I just, you know.
[00:40:40] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:40:40] Speaker A: I don't know, man. I have no fucking answers to anything. But you look at you, I look at people and I look at my friends, and I go, damn, they got married. They're having fucking kids. Like. Like how?
[00:40:50] Speaker C: I'm.
[00:40:51] Speaker A: Like, I'm. I'm 30 years old, and I'm like, I'm not ready to hang up my hat. Not that people are knocking on my door. I may as well be Warren Buffett with no money. You know? No one wants to fuck me.
Some people, emotionally disturbed people. But point I'm trying to make is that, like, I just am. Like, I'm not ready.
[00:41:10] Speaker B: Well, you don't ever want to know.
[00:41:12] Speaker A: I never wanted to do anything. I don't want kids. Like, I. My dream was always, like, meet somebody fucking cool as shit. Never get married and just hang out with each other for the rest of our lives, which will suck because, like, if one of us. One of us will die. That one is gonna have to deal with, like, that. That loneliness is gonna be like. It's gonna be awful.
So, yeah, man, the kids thing, though, I might. A couple, my friends just have kids. And I'm like, damn. Like, damn. And I. They're so beautiful. And I look at them together, and they're very. Yeah, they seem very happy.
[00:41:47] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:41:47] Speaker A: But I'm also sitting there like they don't know shit. Like, I fucking got this figured out. Like, those idiots got married. They had kids. I'm living my best life as I'm, you know, jerking off and microwaving salmon, you know, it's.
[00:42:00] Speaker C: It's.
[00:42:00] Speaker A: And then I look and I go, maybe. Maybe I don't have it all figured out. Maybe they're doing the right thing, you know?
[00:42:05] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:42:05] Speaker B: I mean, it goes back to, like, listen, like, less work doesn't always equal more fun, necessarily. Like, sometimes more work equals to, like, more satisf. I think satisfaction is the big, big theme here. Like, you want to be able to, at the. On your deathbed or somewhere around it, look back on what you've been doing and realized, like, oh, shit, that all felt really good. And it also, I can imagine, like, a holiday where you wake up early, you got the kids waiting for Christmas presents and shit.
[00:42:31] Speaker C: And.
[00:42:31] Speaker B: Yeah, you know, you just spent the previous, you know, year nights, year of nights or whatever, you know, cleaning up junior's diaper when he shits himself in the middle of the night.
[00:42:39] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:42:39] Speaker B: And then you got the older kids who just want gifts, and you had to work your ass off to get these presents, and you had to, you know, organize all the family to get together for dinner. You had to cook, like, all these difficult things. But when the moment happens, I think it becomes all worth it. I haven't been in those situations. I don't have kids and shit, but I really think that that's where life's gonna get juicier. You know what I'm saying?
[00:43:00] Speaker C: I'm. Yes.
[00:43:01] Speaker A: I think you hit a level of just something that you've never. It's something new.
[00:43:05] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:43:05] Speaker B: You know, besides from the novelty, if you want that kind of thing, I think that it gives you, like, those moments of, like, I'm not thinking about anything else. It's like I'm fucking here. When you're in a flow state almost, where you're like, yo, I'm in the best of all possible situations. Like, I get to watch my kids smile, my wife smile, and then we get to have sex at night and I get to hug my kids in the morning and take them to school. Like, I think that. That there's some beauty in that. I think.
[00:43:28] Speaker A: Oh, without a doubt.
[00:43:29] Speaker B: I'm not sure if you want that kind of thing because there are people who don't want it. I know. I know more people, more than you who just don't want.
[00:43:34] Speaker A: Here's the thing, though. Like, I don't. I. There are moments where I have. Where I'm like, it'd be really nice to, like, wake up to, like, somebody in the morning and just have that, like, have coffee with somebody.
[00:43:43] Speaker B: Let me ask. You don't feel a sense of duty to have kids? Cuz, like, if you think about it, you know, like, let's say, well, let's say we all stop having kids. Like, all of us.
[00:43:50] Speaker A: Yeah, say we'll stop.
[00:43:51] Speaker C: Mm hmm.
[00:43:52] Speaker B: The country that does that or the world when it does that, like, your.
[00:43:55] Speaker A: China'S in bad shape.
[00:43:56] Speaker B: We're all extinct in like, 80 to 100 years. If we all just stop having kids, like, isn't that a bugged out thought?
[00:44:03] Speaker A: Wouldn't be the worst thing. We could use a new species just to sort of, like, reach.
We kind of fucked up.
[00:44:08] Speaker B: We're going into it. How do you think about this? We're going. We're morphing into a new species kinda with our dependence on technology.
[00:44:14] Speaker A: I know that already.
[00:44:14] Speaker B: Know. I can't even hold that guy, Brian Johnson. He was like, yo, we're gonna come to a point where we're so integrated with technology that we're gonna be. He dubbed it like, a new species names. We called, like, homo evolutist or some shit. We don't spend our time fighting with each other. We're busy collaborating and we're reading each.
[00:44:30] Speaker A: Other'S thoughts and knowing already what the fuck is going on. Like, I know Joe is thinking that he wants to get out of here.
[00:44:35] Speaker B: I don't know if it's ever gonna get. I hope that, like, our constitution is gonna prevent technology. Remember getting to that level, you know what I mean?
[00:44:40] Speaker A: It's gonna be too much a private. It's gonna be rapid fire, dude. And there's no way. There's no way you can control it.
[00:44:44] Speaker B: Such a cynic, dude.
[00:44:45] Speaker C: It's.
[00:44:45] Speaker A: I. The thing is, is that I'm. There's like a saying. I don't know if it's like a roman saying of, like, enjoy yourself. It's later than you think.
[00:44:52] Speaker B: Fuck, yeah.
[00:44:53] Speaker A: That's where I'm at right now. Where I'm like, I don't know. I think to me, it's. I don't have any sense of duty to having kids. Like, I'm gonna have, what, two fucking kids?
[00:45:01] Speaker C: And.
[00:45:02] Speaker A: And are they gonna be. Are they gonna make the next atom bomb? Probably not. No.
[00:45:06] Speaker C: You know what I mean?
[00:45:06] Speaker B: It's not about that for me, man. It's not about, like, making this gigantic impact. I think you make an impact every time you interact with another person.
[00:45:13] Speaker A: I agree.
[00:45:14] Speaker C: Yes. Your.
[00:45:14] Speaker A: Your smile at the coffee shop impact someone else's day, and then they go home and they don't hit their wife.
[00:45:19] Speaker B: Butterfly.
[00:45:20] Speaker A: You know, shit like that. Fuck, yeah. I agree with you.
[00:45:23] Speaker B: It's real, Br. Really believe that.
[00:45:24] Speaker A: And when I'm with people, I try to be the best person that I can be, and sometimes I'm not. I'm a fucking asshole.
[00:45:29] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:45:29] Speaker A: But my. Me having kids, the only thing, and this is the most egotistical, fucking bullshit reason to have kids is that I'm the last boy with my last name.
[00:45:41] Speaker B: Are you?
[00:45:42] Speaker A: My lineage dies with me. There's no other marxist.
[00:45:44] Speaker B: There are 100% more marxist on this planet, dude.
[00:45:47] Speaker A: Not mine, though. Like, my bloodline to you. Yeah, no, I'm sure there's other fucking Marxist. I mean, sure there's a Harrison mark.
[00:45:52] Speaker B: Somewhere also many Marxists.
[00:45:53] Speaker C: Yes.
[00:45:54] Speaker A: Which they. We don't need more of those.
But I. I'm like, that to me, is like, that bugs me out of them. I. Yo, my fucking. My ancestors and the cavemen that came before me, we're like, you're done.
[00:46:07] Speaker C: They were.
[00:46:07] Speaker A: They were fucking. Like, they were doing everything to keep the line going. And it's like, it's me.
[00:46:12] Speaker C: That's it.
[00:46:12] Speaker A: I know my sister has a kid, but it's.
[00:46:14] Speaker C: It's different.
[00:46:15] Speaker B: Last name, yes.
[00:46:17] Speaker A: And the legacy sort of died and. What, legit, there's no fucking legacy, but, yeah, dies with me. And that's the only thing.
[00:46:22] Speaker B: That's the thing, like, for me, dude. And I could be wrong here. Like, I have loved people who don't want kids. I have no problem. But where my mind goes is like, fuck. Like, is that mean that it's kind of like a mind virus to not want kids because then your bloodline is cut off, so then the virus succeeds. It's like a. You know, I'm saying it's like an idea that kills people in a way. Does that make sense? Like, you effectively kill your own COVID vaccine, but you know what I mean? It's like. It's like a little brainwashiness maybe. Like maybe that's not really your authentic idea. Maybe it's something implanted into you from some media society, whatever.
[00:46:55] Speaker A: The media doesn't influence me at all.
[00:46:57] Speaker C: That.
[00:46:58] Speaker A: No, no, I've always saw this before I. Before I could even read the news.
[00:47:00] Speaker B: Are you on TikTok?
[00:47:02] Speaker A: Yeah, the podcast is.
[00:47:03] Speaker B: See, the tick tock thing bugs me out because, like, I'm not a conspiracy theorist. I think the world is round and all that, but, like. But, like, yo, like, if. If it's true that, you know, the chinese government owns tick tock, which I'm not even sure about, but if it does, it would stand to reason that they're gonna put ideas in Americans heads that kind of work against ourselves. You know what I mean?
[00:47:23] Speaker A: Yeah, but the overpopulation, like, not what. Maybe other people. I can tell you for myself, not once. I was. I was like, oh, it's overpopulated. It's irresponsible to have kids. I'm like, no, I just don't fucking want them. I just don't want to be up at 03:00 a.m. Cleaning shit, not even for a couple years. So I had this conversation with my brother in law, and he loves his kids. He really does.
[00:47:41] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:47:41] Speaker A: However, everyone I speak to say, you got to have kids, man. Life changing life. And I'm like, you know, I mean, it's like everyone saying, like, the guy's saying, you should do heroin. Like, should I? I don't know. But my brother in law said to me, he's like. He looks at me, and I said, I'm like, maybe I have this feeling, like, if I don't have kids, I'll be missing out on an integral part of life. And, like, a piece. No, I said that to. And I said, well, I'd be missing something. Like, just something so, like, that I can't find anywhere else. It's that feeling that I'll never know which is such a big part of being human or alive. Fuck a human. Like, when any animal. And he looks at me and he goes, your friends are lying to you. He's like, don't fucking do it.
[00:48:21] Speaker B: Don't have kids.
[00:48:22] Speaker A: He's like, don't do it. He goes, just don't fucking do it. He's like, it's not. He goes, it's.
[00:48:25] Speaker C: It's beautiful.
[00:48:26] Speaker A: He goes, I love kids. I love my kids.
[00:48:27] Speaker C: He was.
[00:48:27] Speaker A: I'm gonna give them everything. I'm gonna give it my all. He's like, don't fucking do it.
[00:48:32] Speaker B: Why is he telling you that, though?
[00:48:33] Speaker A: Cuz I think he's on, he's being honest. Like I think I. Yo, a part of you is. I don't wanna say taken. It's a lot of work, yo. It's like if you have other. I have specific dreams in mind.
[00:48:43] Speaker C: Goals.
[00:48:43] Speaker A: I don't know what the goals are, but the dream is like I want to just do something really important like, you know. And when you make people laugh doing comedy or acting, you're, you're doing something for people. You're creating something. You're, you're giving someone a human experience. And to me that's like fucking paramount. And if I had children, I know, I just know. Especially because of where I'm at. Like if I made it when I was 22, by this time I'd probably be like, yeah, I can have a kid. I've done it where it's like I don't have to keep like, like fucking ripping through to get there. Whereas right now I got to keep ripping. And if I had a kid, it would have to be when I'm like 50 or 60. Because by that time, if I'm not, if I've not hit it and I'd probably still keep trying because I'm just fucking delusional. Um, you could do it.
[00:49:25] Speaker B: I think Robert De Niro just had a kid.
[00:49:26] Speaker C: No.
[00:49:26] Speaker B: And Al Pacino, he's 80. In the metal dead kid.
[00:49:29] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:49:30] Speaker B: Some expensive proceed.
[00:49:31] Speaker A: I'm sure they've had. They have about 17 nannies, including for Robert De Nure himself.
He's probably wearing the same diapers. Yeah, yeah. That's where I'm like, I just can't do it. Like I know myself. I will resent the kid.
[00:49:48] Speaker C: Oh.
[00:49:48] Speaker B: If you don't reach your dreams before they're born.
[00:49:50] Speaker A: That's the thing. Cuz I. If it took me away from that, I'd be like, I never really found out, like who I could, like, don't get what I could have done and maybe I'll get there. I'm like, wow, this fucking sucks.
[00:49:59] Speaker B: You know, I feel like maybe that's. I thought about that too. And I just feel like maybe it's a thing fallacy to think the kids totally prevent you from it. Like, yeah, you're gonna have less money because they cost money.
[00:50:06] Speaker C: Yeah, fucking.
[00:50:07] Speaker B: You're gonna have less time because they.
[00:50:08] Speaker A: Cost times american sucks.
[00:50:10] Speaker B: But you're still gonna have some free time. Like, you're still gonna have front some free time. So I think I'm of the mind that if you were meant to make it and you keep pushing, something is gonna happen. Like, you just can't. We won't be able to help it, because if you. If you put yourself out there enough, someone's gonna notice it. That matters.
[00:50:25] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:50:26] Speaker B: And if you have the talent there, someone's definitely gonna notice.
[00:50:28] Speaker A: I think I'd give up. That's the thing. I think I'd be like, I'm tired. I'd be like, yo, I'm exhausted. I just. I don't. I don't have it in me. And maybe that makes me a weakling, but that's. I think that's where I'd be. I'd be like, I'm beat, bro.
[00:50:41] Speaker B: No, that's assessment.
[00:50:41] Speaker A: I hear that, you know? And I. That's just who I am, and it's. It, yeah, it's wild.
I don't think that.
I don't think that the. For me. For me, the tick tock is planting certain idea.
[00:50:55] Speaker C: Like.
[00:50:55] Speaker A: Yeah, you watch shit on the Internet. I know your opinion starts to shift on certain things. You're like, wait a minute. And you realize, oh, no, no, no. Like, you watch P. Diddy enough. You watch the shit that I've been watching, and you're like, maybe he did fucking have a human trafficking ring. But I don't fucking know.
[00:51:09] Speaker B: There was a trend on tick tock where people were, like, empathizing with Osama bin Laden on tick tock. I love that you're gonna tell me that's not the result of maybe a little brain watching and the people who run tick tock, maybe just a little bit, you know, tailoring your feed to, like, fuck your head up a little bit.
[00:51:25] Speaker A: I also think that if you start sympathizing with Osama bin Laden and you're living in the United States, it's like, what? You. You're.
You're not just brainwashed, you're just a. And I understand to get brainwashed, you could be very smart. You're just a fucking idiot. You're just a fucking moron. That. And look, there's some. Yo, he was trained by the CIA. Like, that's. That's facts.
[00:51:46] Speaker B: Back in, like, the early nineties, right? Yeah, trainings, a fight against Russia or some shit.
[00:51:50] Speaker C: Yes.
[00:51:50] Speaker A: Which looks. That looks like bad, but I'm not gonna sympathize with that fucking dude ever. Just the same way I wouldn't sympathize with, like. Like, diddy. Like, it's the same. Like, he's an american. He's never killed anyone. But, like, oh, you fucking. Human trafficking. I'm not gonna.
[00:52:05] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:52:05] Speaker A: Wait a minute.
[00:52:06] Speaker C: What?
[00:52:06] Speaker A: But it is, you know, that's the thing. Those smart people.
I watch those cult shows a lot. Like. Like, people who, like, end up in a cult.
[00:52:15] Speaker B: Okay?
[00:52:15] Speaker A: Yeah, like, Scientology should shit like that. And some of them are.
I always think to myself, like, could it happen to me? And my first instinct is like, no, I'm not a fucking moron. But, like, yo, on a bad day, you speak to a guy who makes you feel a little better. And then before, you know, you start hanging out with him, before you know, he's like, yo, dude, the reason I'm this way is because I went to this fucking great meeting. Like, this meeting is. It's amazing. And you're like, all right, let me. Maybe I'll check it out. Then you go to the meeting and you feel kind of good. You're like, wow, these people are actually really cool. They get me. They get me. Keep going to the meetings, and before you know it, the leader of the meeting is like, yo, like, maybe you should all suck my dick. And then you go, I mean, this guy is pretty cool. I trust this dude. And then before you know it, you're like, wait a fucking second. So it could happen to smart people. But I do believe that a large majority of the people getting brainwashed are just fucking morons. They're also kids.
[00:53:07] Speaker B: This looking for belonging. I think this is like trying to fill a void. And unfortunately, like, the vacuum, like, you have, like, as a human, you have to feel belonging. You have to. You need to find it somewhere.
[00:53:15] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:53:16] Speaker B: And if you keep getting rejected by place after place, but you're gonna find a place where you belong, where it's gonna play you for long term, you know, whether you're an incel in the intel community and do some mass shooting shit or like, you know, jihadism, science, like, whatever it is, dude, it's gonna be something bad. So that's where emotional intelligence comes into play. And you're like, yeah, you know what? There are two sides of me. Intellectual side, emotional side. What do I feel and what do I want to do? You know, do first feel.
[00:53:43] Speaker A: Yeah, you can't.
[00:53:44] Speaker B: You can't separate them as humans. I think they're like, fucking.
[00:53:47] Speaker A: It's hard.
[00:53:47] Speaker C: It's hard.
[00:53:48] Speaker A: I mean, cuz, yo, you. Sometimes you'll sit like, if you're fucking the wrong. Like you're dating the wrong person. And like, your intuition and your intellectual side is going, you idiot. You know, she's fucking six other people. But your emotional side is going, nah, I'm gonna ignore this. Like, no, I not, dude. Like, she loves me. Like, does that make sense?
[00:54:06] Speaker B: It does make sense. It does make sense. I would go to say, I would put it like your intuitions, your emotional side, your intellectual side is the side that you could like talk to yourself. Okay then, but I assume we're taking the same.
[00:54:17] Speaker A: You get what I'm like where you're like, you just ignore that shit. You're like, you know, you're like, you fucking know, but you just, you're just dumb. It's like you're brainwashed. Like in that moment, you're done.
[00:54:27] Speaker B: I've been in this, a similar situation, but it's kind of like, okay, intellectually I know something is off here.
[00:54:33] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:54:33] Speaker B: But emotionally I'm like, yo, just feels so good to be around this person. So just like, fuck it. Like, it just feels good. You know, I'm not going to judge whatever's happening on the. In the back end, you know, whatever I'm communicating is reaching her and it's all making sense until actually it's like, you know, this thing that happened is bad. But she responded well in a way that made me feel like, okay. Like she sees kind of the wrong thing that she did until we moved past it. It's like an intellectual versus emotional thing. Cuz people who I've talked to will tell me, like, yo, listen to your intellectual side. Like, that was a fucked up thing that happened. But emotional, like, you don't know what I'm feeling like, you don't know what it feels like to be around you don't know what, what I feel when I think about it. When I'm alone in a room, when I think about the intellectual side, like, I still feel in my gut, like, yeah, we're good. Like, I just, I feel good. And that's sometimes the best decision to make so far anyway.
[00:55:17] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:55:18] Speaker A: And I look, and at the end of the day, you make the decision. It's your life and that's the most important thing. Okay. However, I know people who are in, in situations, in a situation, I know a person is in a situationships more than that. It's very deep and like, they've been together for a while and it's hard to, to.
Even if it gets to a point where like, how long could this feel good but you still have to deal with the other bullshit. Like how many, how long can you put up with that? Like, you know, there comes a point where you're blatantly doing yourself a disservice. Fuck you know what I mean? That's what I'm saying. Like, if it happened for a little bit and you got over it and it feels good and, like, things started to change and they started to work out for you, great. But there comes a point where it's like, all right, this has been five years of, like, this is a terrible idea, but it feels good when I'm with them. You may as well be doing drugs.
[00:56:12] Speaker B: Do you mean, like, in what you're talking about? Like, is it the one situation that happened that's in the back of this person's intellectual mind, or is it, like, constant signs that he's intellectually ignoring.
[00:56:21] Speaker A: Okay, constant signs of, like, this is not. This is not good. Like, I feel good, and I love this person.
[00:56:26] Speaker B: This thing keeps happening.
[00:56:27] Speaker A: They're slapping me in the face, and, like, I'm kind of ignoring it. That's the thing where I'm like, no, you.
[00:56:31] Speaker B: Yeah, no, that first, I think for sure you're right there. But for. In my situation, it's like, one thing happened, and it happened and emote, and, like, since then, it's all just been green flags. We're just green flagging. Emotionally, I'm good. Emotionally, I'm good. And has been little slaps. But we're talking little slaps. If it starts off with one big slap, and then they apologize to you, and you're like, okay, you know, it's fine. Like, you'll see. But then, like, constant little slaps. Dude, it's a run for the hills.
[00:56:55] Speaker A: 100%, dude.
[00:56:56] Speaker B: Got a dodge.
[00:56:57] Speaker C: It's. That's.
[00:56:58] Speaker A: That's the thing that. But a lot of people don't. They're just like, nah, like, dude, you.
[00:57:03] Speaker B: Know, it's tough to be single when you have, like, the. The intensity of a new relationship to compare it to. That's fresh.
[00:57:10] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:57:10] Speaker B: I mean, like, it's tough to be, like. Like, just two weeks ago, we were staring into each other's eyes and, like, really into it, and now no more. And now you wake up, and it's like, nobody's there. Nobody's asking you how your day was, all that shit. So I think that it's not an excuse to keep being in a bad thing.
[00:57:26] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:57:26] Speaker B: I think that's what's happening. It's, like, the change. The adjustment period is fucking tough.
[00:57:30] Speaker A: The adjustment period is always going to be tough, but I think that if you, like, it gets to a point where you have to just, like, Tom Hardy has this thing. Like, you got to cut it the fuck out.
[00:57:42] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:57:42] Speaker A: Like, he said he was talking. I don't know who he was talking to, but they were like. He was. So he said, tom, do you remember years ago in England, there were these floods and Tom's like, yeah. He goes, and remember there was a little boy, he got his legs stuck in the grate and, like, the sewer grate, and he's like, yeah, I remember he was in the water, kept rising and rising and rising and rising. And that little boy drowned. He's like, yeah. He goes, that wouldn't happen to me. He's like, what do you mean he was? Because I would have told them to cut it off. Cut my fucking leg off. And he's like. He's like, so what does that mean? He's like, basically, sometimes you need to cut off a piece of yourself to grow.
[00:58:22] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:58:22] Speaker A: To survive. And, like, with a relationship, it's the same thing. Like, yo, if you just say, you know what? And it's hard. It's fucking hard to just be like, I cannot speak to you anymore. I can't. And then a month goes by, and you're like, you figured out like a human being. Like, you're meant to adapt.
Eventually it becomes easy if you're stern and disciplined with it, the same way you would be like, going to the gym every day. I don't want to fucking go, but I go every day. And if you ended up cutting that person off or that thing that's making you feel like, I can't live without it, if you fucking cut it out, within a month, you'll be like, you know what?
[00:58:59] Speaker B: Okay, where it's like taking a drug at that point, only the drug is like, comfort and complacency.
[00:59:03] Speaker A: Exactly. Well, drugs give you comfort.
[00:59:05] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:59:05] Speaker A: And they make you complacent, familiar, and they make you way more fun.
[00:59:10] Speaker B: Not me, though.
[00:59:11] Speaker A: No, no, no, not you.
[00:59:12] Speaker B: Um, yeah, yeah. I mean, you're definitely on to something, but it just goes to show most of our. Most of the worst shit that we do to ourselves, it's some form of drug, whether it's a bad relationship or actual substances or a shitty habit or, you know, like a character flow we're not addressing.
[00:59:25] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:59:26] Speaker B: Feels like home to us.
[00:59:27] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:59:27] Speaker B: Because it's worked a little bit in the past.
[00:59:29] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:59:29] Speaker B: And you see it's worked once in the past. You start extrapolating it mistakenly.
[00:59:33] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:59:33] Speaker B: Other things you get out of life. Like, that's a. It's a big part of mental illness, too. We're like a lot of people who've been through some shit when they were kids, you know? Like, they. They take on these. These ways of adapting. They're, like, mad manipulative of people. Yeah, they're very, like, fucked up and mean spirited, but they keep doing them because they noticed, like, oh, that's how I can, you know, get out of trouble with my abusive parents or get what I want or my abuser. It's how I get what I want. And it's also how I avoid pain. Yeah, no, like, you have to manipulate the person who's hurting you to get away from the pain. So then, like, the really seriously mental little people among us, like, they're gonna take that lesson from when there were kids and think that it's gonna work when they're adults and they keep the. And once, if it works, even once or twice when they're adults, like, oh, there's always gonna work, even though it fucks them up every time. And that's why it keeps them in the. A shitty situation, of course.
[01:00:16] Speaker C: And it's.
[01:00:17] Speaker B: It's tough to undo. It's almost like. It's like a personality trait is the drug. You know what I mean?
[01:00:21] Speaker A: Of course.
[01:00:22] Speaker B: Works a couple times, and it feels good. But if you can zoom out, if you have the insight to zoom out and see, like, oh, this is on the whole, kind of fucking me up. I got to change. Like, that's huge effort. Huge.
[01:00:31] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:00:32] Speaker B: Huge effort to make, man. You know what I mean?
[01:00:34] Speaker A: You ever. I have these moments. I don't think about it when I'm meeting somebody, but there are moments where, like, you ever wonder, you, like, what if I end up meeting someone who seems. Who's just manipulating you the whole time? Like, a crazy. Like, you see, like, these dudes who end up, like, their wife ends up fucking killing them or their husband ends up killing, like, I imagine I always am. Like, what if I'm meeting the person that's gonna end up cutting my dick off?
[01:00:59] Speaker B: Straight up psychopath.
[01:01:00] Speaker A: Complete psycho. And you have no fucking. Like, that's a skin. Like, that dude, who was the Gilgo beach murders in Long island?
[01:01:07] Speaker B: Oh, it would remind me of that, bro.
[01:01:09] Speaker A: It was like a 30 year fucking. Just these. A bunch of girls were getting murdered, and nobody knew who the fuck it was. Nobody knew. And I think recently, someone else was killed, and they found out. It was just this regular Joe in, living in Long island, married with kids and a wife, and whenever she would go on a trip, he'd go out and murder some girl in the park. And, like, imagine you fucking, like, you're talking to the person you sit and you have coffee, you like, oh, hey, I'm, you know, Joe. Like, who are you? Oh, you're. You're Bethany. It's lovely to me. And you find out that they're total. Like, you find out 30 years later, they're fucking psycho.
[01:01:41] Speaker B: How did he finally get caught?
[01:01:42] Speaker A: There was some sort of evidence or something. He slipped up. But it was.
[01:01:47] Speaker B: Maybe he wanted to get. Maybe wanted to slip up, you know? Maybe you wanted the credit for it finally.
[01:01:51] Speaker A: I mean, I would too. I mean, at that point. But it's a scary thing of, like, what if. Damn. What if this person's totally manipulating me and I have just no idea, man.
[01:02:00] Speaker B: Yeah, you gotta. Gotta make sure you're.
[01:02:01] Speaker A: People are fucked up.
[01:02:02] Speaker B: Yeah, I feel you. I just feel like, fuck, I have faith in myself to catch it. I just feel like there's gonna be red flags. Cause like, even, you know, like, you could just, like. People are even the best liars among us. They slip up.
[01:02:13] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:02:14] Speaker A: Remember lies.
[01:02:14] Speaker B: They're gonna say something weird. They're gonna. And they're gonna hit you in your gut at least a little bit. That's why I always preach like, yo, it's important to listen to that thing in your belly that's telling you something is off. Even if nothing's off, even though things, like, objectively off, if you feel something's off, just listen to it, see what's up.
[01:02:30] Speaker A: I don't remember who the fuck said it was on a podcast, but somebody had said they knew. They knew somebody who had an aunt, right? And that aunt went on a date with a guy back in, like, seventies or some shit, and she was sitting there. I told you about this.
[01:02:47] Speaker C: Maybe.
[01:02:47] Speaker B: Go ahead. Go ahead.
[01:02:48] Speaker A: Where she goes sitting on the danger, like something's not right with this fucking guy. Something. I don't know what it is. And she ended up, like, saying, excuse me for a minute. She went to the phone booth, she called her brother, and she goes, yo, you got to pick me up. Like, there's something up with this fucking dude.
[01:03:05] Speaker B: If you told me this, I may have same story.
[01:03:07] Speaker C: Okay?
[01:03:07] Speaker A: I may have.
[01:03:07] Speaker B: I know where you're going.
[01:03:08] Speaker A: Fucking brother picks her up year. And he ended up, like, showing up by the house a couple times, this guy. Like, he was a little off. And it turns out it was fucking Ted Bundy. Like, yeah, she listened. Like, if she didn't listen, that little thing going on, you just being.
[01:03:22] Speaker C: You're just being a bit.
[01:03:23] Speaker B: Was way too generous. It was way too generous with strangers. That's the thing, man. Like, you gotta fucking. Yeah, listen to it. You gotta listen to it. Like, people are weird, man. People are weird. And I just don't think that anybody is that good. I don't think the psychopaths among us are even that good of liars. Like, if you spend enough time with someone, hours and hours and hours, you got to be able to find something. Like, maybe you're too. I don't see naive, but, you know, like, too generous with what you think of people. Yeah, you'll miss it. But if you have the New York mentality of, like, everybody's trying to scam me. Everybody's got some hidden agenda. I just feel like you're gonna find something, bro.
[01:03:55] Speaker A: I agree with that. I also don't think it's the healthiest. Like, everyone's trying to scam me because that's not gonna be. It's a.
The thing that I wonder is, like, okay, with a childhood friend. Like, imagine. Imagine somebody said to you, yo, that dude is running a human trafficking rig.
[01:04:16] Speaker B: Like, if someone told me about your childhood.
[01:04:17] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:04:17] Speaker A: Like, someone said to you, like, yo, Harrison's running a human trafficking ring. And you were like, absolutely not. Like, I know the guy for 20 fucking years.
[01:04:24] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:04:25] Speaker A: Like, there's no fucking way I know him.
[01:04:27] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:04:27] Speaker A: And then you find out years later I have a human trafficking. I'm just saying that I'm not running a human trafficking ring. Not yet, but it's just.
[01:04:39] Speaker C: You just.
[01:04:39] Speaker A: You never fucking know. You just never know.
[01:04:44] Speaker B: Friends who, like, if they're running human.
[01:04:45] Speaker A: Trafficking range, you wouldn't be shocked.
You could see it.
[01:04:53] Speaker B: Because some people, they don't. Like, they just don't feel. Don't have this reactionary emotion to certain things that I would expect you to have.
[01:05:01] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:05:01] Speaker B: If you, like, watch some heartbreaking thing on the television or you hear about a heartbreaking situation and you know from my line of work, when I tell you, then you don't react a certain way. Yeah, I get, like, a psychopath vibe from you. Not you personally. If I tell someone some crazy shit and they look at me like deadpan, it's like, no, dude, something could be off with you. I would never say it out loud, but it registers in my head, like, cha ching.
[01:05:22] Speaker A: Like, so it could go one of two ways. One, you could be totally off, and you're like, yeah, this guy's fucking weird. Like, that person's off. Or it could just be like, that person is having. Has a bill due to the IR's. He has no money to feed his children. And he's panicked and he doesn't want to tell his friends because he's gonna seem like a failure. There's also that, like, he just is, like, great. Those people in that bridge in Baltimore, I don't give a fuck.
[01:05:45] Speaker C: That's great.
[01:05:46] Speaker A: I'm so. That sucks, but I need to pay my fucking electric.
[01:05:49] Speaker B: That's different because they. At least you're acknowledging that. I know I should be acting like this, but I'm in a crazy.
[01:05:52] Speaker A: I'm in a crazy.
What if they don't react that way? I'm saying if they just react like, damn, bro, that's crazy. You want to get fries? Like, if they react like that, it could be that, like, they're thinking inside their head.
[01:06:05] Speaker B: Stress.
[01:06:06] Speaker C: Shit, dude.
[01:06:06] Speaker A: Like, I gotta fucking pay that bill, man. I don't know how I'm gonna do it.
[01:06:09] Speaker C: You know?
[01:06:09] Speaker A: I mean, that.
[01:06:10] Speaker B: This is how I know you're probably not a psychopath, because even that reaction would also tell me, like, okay, I could still tell you you're stressed about something else, but if you react like this, if you, like, make a joke about it a little too quick. Like, a little too quick.
[01:06:21] Speaker A: I do that.
[01:06:21] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:06:22] Speaker B: But it's different, bro. Like this. I don't know, there's just, like. I can't put it into words, dude. I just can't.
[01:06:27] Speaker A: There's this sense of lacking. Of humanity.
[01:06:29] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:06:29] Speaker B: Like, it's the way people generally carry themselves. They give themselves up.
[01:06:33] Speaker A: I get that.
[01:06:34] Speaker B: As a rule. They just always fucking do.
[01:06:36] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:06:36] Speaker B: And, you know, it's tough to even say that with any. With any sense of, like, you know, truth because you don't. You don't really know if you're shitty ideas. It's not falsifiable, but it's better to trust and it's not say that much.
[01:06:48] Speaker A: I get it. I get that. I will say so. And this is gonna sound like a really psycho fucking thing to say or a real sociopathic fucking psycho shit.
And maybe I'm. Maybe I'm really fucked up and I just have a handle on myself. But do you ever see situations of, like, you just look at the situation. You could imagine the moat, like, something like you could. This is so bad to say out loud, but you could see, like, I could totally kill that person right now if I wanted to know.
[01:07:18] Speaker B: Dude, I'm a martial artist.
[01:07:19] Speaker A: Like, no, no, no. I mean, like. Like, brutally murder someone. Not like if he comes at me, I'll fucking voodoo his. Like, you know, karate choppy shit. You don't ever, like, see scenarios in your head, but you're like, I'm not gonna do that because I am well rounded and I know not to do that. But I. There's that weird thing in your head of, like, wow, I could, like, totally strangle you right now.
[01:07:38] Speaker B: No, like, listen, as a human, you know, you.
[01:07:40] Speaker A: You have weird thoughts.
[01:07:42] Speaker C: Yeah, yeah.
[01:07:42] Speaker B: But I know that they're weird thoughts. Like, you know, there's also the same thing of, like, you're driving and you're like, yo, why don't I just, you know what I mean? It just causes your mind. It's like, I don't want to ruin my life. I don't want to ruin other people's lives. And the order, affection, they're terrible. I don't want to do that. But it's just like, you know, I.
[01:07:55] Speaker A: Could drive off this bridge, right?
[01:07:56] Speaker B: The only thing stopping me from doing that is me right now not doing it. There's nothing. I'll stop.
[01:08:01] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:08:01] Speaker B: You know what I mean, though? That's kind of normal. Like, your mind is like, fantasying because.
[01:08:05] Speaker A: You weird, scary movies as a final destination. Like, when I'm driving on the highway, this is not me hurting anybody. I would never hurt anyone. I'd sooner hurt myself than anybody else. But I. When you're driving on the highway and you see, like, that, like, there's a guy with, like, steel pipes driving, and you see, like, the strap is not strapped.
[01:08:22] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:08:23] Speaker A: And you're like, oh, that's gonna come directly into my windshield, splatter my face all over the bag.
And then after that, my car is gonna flip. The guy next to me is gonna get crushed.
[01:08:32] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:08:32] Speaker A: And then we're gonna probably swerve off the bridge, and then we're all, I'll be dead already, but everyone else is gonna drown. Yeah, weird shit like that.
[01:08:39] Speaker C: No. Yeah. Just.
[01:08:40] Speaker B: It's a lot of movies as a kid, man. I have those thoughts for sure. Especially on the road, especially when, like, there's a car towing other cars.
[01:08:46] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:08:46] Speaker B: It's a bunch of car.
[01:08:47] Speaker A: One's gonna fall back 100%.
[01:08:48] Speaker B: It's gonna. Yeah, happen. Especially when you're not thinking about it. You always got to be thinking about it. Just get away from it. Or the plane thing, dude, planes.
[01:08:54] Speaker A: Oh, dude, the plane thing.
[01:08:56] Speaker B: Going over bridges.
[01:08:57] Speaker C: Honestly.
[01:08:57] Speaker B: Going over bridge.
[01:08:58] Speaker A: I don't fucking.
[01:08:59] Speaker B: I want to get the verizon as soon as possible every time.
[01:09:01] Speaker A: I don't like being on there. Well, do you? So what happened in Baltimore? Yeah, dude, the fuck, dude, the video I watched the video, not watching the cars, just fucking make it. I'm like, in my balls were in my sick.
[01:09:13] Speaker B: It's fucking just, like, people missing.
[01:09:16] Speaker A: Here's the thing. You imagine you're like, yo, fuck, my life sucks right now. Whatever, whatever, whatever. In that position, like, that's the last. Last thing you would ever think would happen to you. And it's like, it could happen. So, like, enjoy, appreciate things a little more, which I don't do very well. There are a lot of times I'm like, fuck everything. And, you know, I could have been on that bridge very much. Like, you know, it just. It goes to show you, like, you never, like, the most odd of things can happen.
[01:09:44] Speaker B: No, that's why. So, like, this is, like, a twisted logic, but I just. I do it anyway.
[01:09:47] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:09:47] Speaker B: I assume that every person on that bridge probably wasn't thinking like, yo, what if this bridge collapses?
[01:09:53] Speaker A: No, no. They're driving home, they're pissed at their work at 130 in the morning.
[01:09:55] Speaker B: That's why I make it a point. Every time I'm on a bridge, I'm thinking, this shit's gonna collapse. I need to get the fuck off it. Like, I'm all the time, every bridge, every plane. I'm thinking worst case scenario, just so I could, like, organize myself in some way to reduce the odds. I die. It's probably pointless, but I do it without fail. I don't say it out loud. I don't scare the people I'm with.
[01:10:12] Speaker A: But no, of course, every time.
[01:10:13] Speaker B: Tell you right now, I don't have.
[01:10:15] Speaker A: It every time on the bridge. But there are moments. I'm like, I like to get the fuck off this thing with the plane. It bothers me more because I'm like, I have no control of an exit strategy. And an exit strategy at 30,000ft is bullshit. Everyone's dying. I'm like, I know that already.
[01:10:28] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:10:29] Speaker A: I'm like, this is going to be pointless. But I do always pick the aisle seat because I'm like, if for chance I make it, I want to be the first one out of this fucking plans, plans.
[01:10:38] Speaker B: Fucked up subjects I just read a little bit about. Remember MH 370?
[01:10:41] Speaker A: Oh, the malaysian fight? He's kidding me. Of course I'm missing.
[01:10:43] Speaker B: They still don't know where it is.
[01:10:44] Speaker A: Did you watch the documentary on Netflix?
[01:10:46] Speaker C: No.
[01:10:46] Speaker B: I should, though.
[01:10:47] Speaker C: But I.
[01:10:47] Speaker B: Maybe I read, like, an article about it. But one article I read recently was like, yo, they found out that the flight captain, maybe the co captain, like, he. There was evidence that he made plans to do this for a while. Like, a lot of weird things were happening surrounding the flight where it's like, oh, this motherfucker fucker planned it. He planned to just kill everybody and himself.
[01:11:05] Speaker A: Well, that's the other thing about you never know what someone will do. Like, yo, that's when knowing that there's another human being who he may be going through a divorce, he may be having, you know, he may be drunk. He may want to kill himself desperately. And today, maybe the fucking day, more than a mechanical issue. Well, I mean, unless I'm on a Boeing airplane because those things are fucked now, those max nines, apparently. Yeah, but that always I listen to the voice and I'm like. And he's like, all right, we're gonna be traveling at 30,000ft and we're gonna get you there nice and smooth and safe and, you know, it's gonna be nice and sunny in California and we'll see you soon. Like, that to me is like, okay, he's got a grip. He seems to have a grip. But then again, he may fucking not. It's the guys who are like, okay, this is your, like, I just try to listen to the tone of the voice and I'm like, this guy doesn't sound okay. This guy sounds like his wife is fucking the gym trainer.
[01:11:54] Speaker B: You should also have those thoughts when, like, you're meeting a new doctor or nurse or, or someone's in charge of your well being. Like, shit's crazy, bro. People have emotional humans. We go through emotional shit. We have issues.
[01:12:03] Speaker A: Yes, yes. But they're gonna kill me slowly and I won't know it.
[01:12:06] Speaker C: You know?
[01:12:06] Speaker A: I mean, this guy's gonna just fucking decide to go, you know what? We're making a pit stop in the Rocky Mountains. I'm gonna fucking kill us all. And that, to me, is not okay because you're just, you're, you're in a fucking steel box of doom fucking bogs. I'm gonna be taking a plane in two weeks.
[01:12:22] Speaker C: Oh, yeah, you are.
[01:12:22] Speaker A: You know, like, oh, I hate flying. And when I was hours. When I don't fly for a long time, I get scared again. When I'm doing it on a regular basis, I kind of just get numbed out to it.
[01:12:32] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:12:33] Speaker A: But the other thing is the best remedy, and I don't like to do this as much anymore because I'm older, is get wasted.
[01:12:39] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:12:39] Speaker A: Like if I have a couple shots before the flight and then a couple when I'm on, I'm laying there, fucking take this thing out a little more nervous, actually. No, I'm like, I'm drunk on the plane.
[01:12:49] Speaker B: I get a little more, like, worked up. It's. I love drinking before a flight, though, because you meet people at the bar that are always, like, interested down the chat.
[01:12:56] Speaker C: Strange.
[01:12:57] Speaker A: Not strange, but just like, just different people.
[01:12:59] Speaker B: Yeah, I met a few flights ago, I met this chick, older lady.
[01:13:03] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:13:04] Speaker B: Who, like, hugged me at the end. I just listened to her story. She told me about how, like, her.
[01:13:07] Speaker A: You probably saved her life.
[01:13:08] Speaker B: I don't know, she's like, not, she wasn't like, she was already pretty well adjusted. She just said that her, her best friend was murdered by. By the husband and she was going to New York to, like, visit the family on the e on the anniversary of the birthday or the death or some shit. And it's just like, crazy, cuz, like, I just. I never drink before a flight. I just wanted to on a whim and like, yeah, dude, just heard the story and it's like, fuck, bro, you just don't know what people are going through.
[01:13:31] Speaker A: Well, and that's the thing, though. They're like, sometimes people need to unload and it's the straight a stranger is the best person to unload on. Like, I tell people, like, when I meet girls a lot, I'm like, you could tell me whatever. I'm like, I don't know you. Like, this is the greatest thing. We could just go our separate ways after this.
[01:13:45] Speaker B: And what's the craziest shit you've ever been told?
[01:13:47] Speaker A: Ah, there was a situation, I'm trying to think, where someone dealt with, like, families, like, touching them. And I was told that, and I'm like, damn, that's. That's wild. Like, that's wild.
The worst thing, it's like, the people that you're supposed to trust, you just can't. It fucks up every relationship after that.
[01:14:08] Speaker C: Yeah, totally.
[01:14:09] Speaker A: But, like, shit like that, I'm like, I literally say, like, you're in a bad relationship or like, you just broken up. Like, a lot of times where I find out, like, someone's like, yeah, I just got out of relationship. If I know, I'm like, we're probably not gonna be together or we're just strangers and this is not a date. I'll be like, tell me about it. And I just. I want to hear everything because it's like, yo, most of the time, people are dying to just say it. Dying. And I'm literally. What am I gonna say? Like, you're an idiot. No big. Oh, shit. Okay, keep going.
[01:14:35] Speaker C: What do you think?
[01:14:35] Speaker A: You know? And it just. It's really great. And then I could do the same if I want to. You're not gonna judge me? Um, it depends if I have something on my mind like that. I mean, I was. My uncle didn't touch me, so I don't have that to tell.
[01:14:48] Speaker B: So just the family touching the person, that's. What do they do? Like, can you get more specific or. No, it's too crazy. Okay.
[01:14:54] Speaker A: The thing is, I stayed friends with certain people. Like, then that becomes a different thing.
But when you're expecting to just be strangers, the thing is, if you end up keeping that friendship, it's like, wow, you. I trust you. Like, you got, you know, a lot of my shit, and it becomes a pretty cool, quick bond, which is what I felt like.
[01:15:14] Speaker B: A stranger first could become a pretty.
[01:15:16] Speaker A: Close friend if you just happen to keep in touch. It's like, oh, wow. Like, you know the most intimate things about me that most of my friends don't even know.
[01:15:22] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:15:22] Speaker B: I mean, it also, like, turn you on to. Why? Because, like, you find out a lot about a person with how they treat fucked up shit, you know?
[01:15:28] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:15:28] Speaker B: That if. How they treat it, how they talk about it, like, turns you on to just being a friend or whatever.
[01:15:32] Speaker C: Yeah, that's that.
[01:15:33] Speaker B: A friend for life.
[01:15:33] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:15:34] Speaker B: Like, I feel you, bro.
[01:15:35] Speaker A: Exactly.
[01:15:35] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:15:35] Speaker B: Weird world. It's pretty cool.
[01:15:37] Speaker C: Very weird world. Yeah.
[01:15:38] Speaker B: That's why I love. That's why I love psychiatry, because if my job is basically to, like, I'm not a psychiatrist, but being in the field of psychiatry, just hear the most personal stories of people.
[01:15:46] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:15:46] Speaker B: And that's how you really see someone's humanity. Like, when they're telling you the most fucked up shit that's happened to them. Like, it's very raw, and it's hard to fake to the point where someone's faking it, you're gonna feel it. Like, it's very hard to fake raw shit, you know, like, really intense stuff.
[01:16:00] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:16:00] Speaker B: And I just think it's a gift to be able to, like, see the innards of people's minds, like, kind of.
[01:16:05] Speaker A: On a daily basis with acting. Like, when I did, there were certain roles that I did where I connected with people. Like, they told me the most intimate. I was like, yo, if we just get down to the raw shit, we'll be. Our performance will be better up there. Like, it'll be more real if you.
[01:16:18] Speaker B: Share personal details, everything.
[01:16:20] Speaker A: Like, yeah, we've. I've done exercises. Like, there's this thing called, like 36.
[01:16:24] Speaker B: Questions asked to fall in love with.
[01:16:25] Speaker A: To fall in love or some shit. And, yo, we knew the most intimate. I've done this with a couple people. The most intimate fucking details of our lives. And when you're up there, you don't fake the emotions. They come a lot more naturally. It's fucking dangerous because if you have relationships outside of that job because it's such an emotional job, you could destroy potentially a great relationship at home because your mind is saying, I think I love this person. And actually it's like, no, you don't. You just.
[01:16:51] Speaker B: Yeah, weird.
[01:16:52] Speaker A: Maybe you do, but most of the time it's like, no, this is. And you have to remember it's work. But you learn a lot, dude. What?
[01:16:59] Speaker B: You're like a performance artist and you have to perform with other people. And sometimes you have to perform like you're in love or like you're in lust. Like, if you're, like, for example, like, if you're married to, like, a professional dancer and she's a professional, I don't know, like some intimate spanish type of dance.
[01:17:13] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:17:14] Speaker B: You have to watch her go compete with her partner and they do some pretty sexual shit.
[01:17:18] Speaker A: I've had to make out with people on stage when I had a significant other. And I'm sure that was not easy for them to watch. Dudes do not. Women and men. Yeah, men that they didn't care about.
I mean, the guy had a huge cock.
No, it's hard, dude. But the thing is, is that you can tell if you're watching someone whether it's on stage or film.
[01:17:39] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:17:39] Speaker B: Whether it's real or not.
[01:17:40] Speaker A: If it's, like, stiff. I mean, maybe because also, like, when you're watching movies, like, from Hollywood, like, their professionals is different. Like they.
[01:17:46] Speaker B: But something. Those couples fall in love.
[01:17:48] Speaker A: No, like, that's it.
[01:17:49] Speaker C: That's.
[01:17:49] Speaker A: That's the dangerous part.
[01:17:51] Speaker B: Like, you have, like, a couple that actually falls in love on set and then a couples who just kind of took whatever.
[01:17:56] Speaker C: Just.
[01:17:56] Speaker B: Can you think of any, like Angelina.
[01:17:58] Speaker A: Jolie and Brad Pitt.
[01:17:59] Speaker B: So they really love after that movie.
[01:18:01] Speaker A: It was during it.
[01:18:01] Speaker B: Yeah, it was during it, yeah. So you think that in that movie was much more natural. That movie was amazing. That was a pretty natural.
[01:18:06] Speaker A: Those scenes, like, where they're fucking, like in the kitchen and everything. So I'm like, yo, damn. They like that.
[01:18:10] Speaker C: There's.
[01:18:10] Speaker A: This is a lot. Yeah. And it also could be that they're great actors, but, like, with amateur actors, like, people, like, when you watch them, like, when I was in school, you can tell, like, this person's not comfortable with the other person, which my job, I was always like, yo, you're gonna. We are gonna have drinks, we're gonna hang out, we're gonna be friends. We're gonna tell each other shit that we don't want to tell anybody. So when we get there, we're gonna really be intimate. Like, it's gonna. You could see the difference.
[01:18:35] Speaker B: So any, like, actor examples were like, they really weren't in love, but they're just doing it for the movie. Anything come to mind where it looks a little more stiffer?
[01:18:42] Speaker A: Trying to think, like, no shot.
It's hard with film because you can always cut. You can always cut to a scene where he's touching her leg and then cut her face.
[01:18:50] Speaker B: It's much more surgical.
[01:18:51] Speaker A: Yeah, whereas, like, in a play, you'd have more of an idea.
[01:18:55] Speaker B: Word, word. I'm a fucking play guy recently, by the way.
[01:18:57] Speaker C: Dude.
[01:18:57] Speaker A: Oh, dude, we saw the Iceman cometh.
No, no, no. We didn't see ice makeup. We saw waiting for Godot.
[01:19:04] Speaker B: We saw waiting for Godot.
[01:19:06] Speaker A: Gotta go.
[01:19:07] Speaker B: Amazing. I also saw doubt with live shriver and.
[01:19:10] Speaker A: And. Yes, yes. Supposed to be very good.
[01:19:13] Speaker B: Amazing.
[01:19:13] Speaker A: He's amazing. That he's amazing.
[01:19:15] Speaker B: He's fucking. Yeah, amazing. The whole play was amazing. Yeah, like fucking amazing.
[01:19:21] Speaker A: Who'd you go with?
[01:19:22] Speaker B: I went with my girl.
[01:19:23] Speaker A: Oh. How'd she like it?
[01:19:25] Speaker B: She loved it as well. Yeah, we both liked it.
[01:19:28] Speaker C: She's.
[01:19:28] Speaker B: She's more. It's interesting cuz she's like a performer herself. Not by trade, but you know, she just.
[01:19:32] Speaker A: I know.
[01:19:33] Speaker B: Dancing like shit, so she saw it and like, more, like, more technical. Like she commented on the set design or some shit or something.
[01:19:40] Speaker A: No, I get that.
[01:19:41] Speaker B: Where for me, I'm just looking at the performance like these motherfuckers killed it.
[01:19:43] Speaker C: Yeah. Damn.
[01:19:44] Speaker B: You guys gave me chills constantly.
[01:19:45] Speaker A: But when you take a second to look back and you go, Sam, someone fucking built this goddamn house inside this fucking building.
[01:19:50] Speaker B: I don't think it was really cool things that were happening, like. Like very smooth transitions and the set was clearly very expensive. Like, the floor was fucking moving in. The tickets, that's Broadway represented that. Yeah, but it was fucking sick. What I loved about it was that it was called doubt. And not only is doubt like the main plot, but, like, doubt, you leave doubting what you just watched.
[01:20:11] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:20:12] Speaker B: Leave doubting your own feelings.
[01:20:13] Speaker A: Like you close a movie, I think doubt is it.
[01:20:15] Speaker B: No.
[01:20:16] Speaker A: Well, Meryl Streep was on Broadway for doubt also.
[01:20:19] Speaker B: I think it's a longtime player.
[01:20:20] Speaker C: Is it? Yeah, it's.
[01:20:22] Speaker B: Maybe it's adapted from something else, I don't know. But my point, though, is that it's so good because, like, bro, you start off very sure of some shit.
[01:20:29] Speaker A: Yeah, very sure.
[01:20:30] Speaker B: You're, like, foregone conclusion.
[01:20:32] Speaker A: Doubt?
[01:20:32] Speaker C: What? Doubt.
[01:20:32] Speaker B: Am I doubting? And then something happened. You're like, whoa, okay, that's ambiguous. Then it ends, and you're like, fuck, yeah.
[01:20:38] Speaker C: Now.
[01:20:38] Speaker B: I don't know. Like, doubt is, like, suffused through the fucking play. It was amazing.
[01:20:41] Speaker A: Well, any great work will make you think about it after you leave. Like, that's the most important thing. Whether you hate it or love it. It's not important. You can hate it, but you're thinking about it. You can love it, but you're thinking about it. You cannot be sure, but you're. If you're thinking about it, that's all that fucking matters. Everything else is like, I went to.
[01:20:56] Speaker B: Watch interstellar when it came out in the theaters.
[01:20:58] Speaker C: Oh.
[01:20:58] Speaker A: You know, I only watched it recently for the first time.
[01:21:00] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:21:01] Speaker B: How'd you feel at the end?
[01:21:01] Speaker A: Holy shit, dude. Like, first of all, I was like, this man. Christopher Nolan is a fucking nut. The fact that you could think this shit up, it's like, what are you talking about? Like, I don't understand anything that's going on here. But I understood it, but I didn't. Like, my mind couldn't. You know what I mean?
[01:21:14] Speaker B: You wouldn't wrap your head around a little bit. It was like. So.
[01:21:17] Speaker A: It's so bizarre. It's like wrapping your head around the fact that, like, the universe. Like, it's like, wait, what? I can't.
[01:21:22] Speaker B: And the fact that, like, they're different. Like, time, like, time parallel universe shit.
[01:21:27] Speaker A: Like, this is happening somewhere else, but there's a plane crashing through here. Like, it's. Anything that could be happening is happening.
[01:21:32] Speaker B: Yeah, it's.
[01:21:34] Speaker A: Yeah, it's interstellar. I was.
When he goes to visit the daughter when she's, like, 90 years old, I was like, what the fuck, for me.
[01:21:45] Speaker B: Was when he was in the bookcase.
[01:21:47] Speaker A: Like, in an apparel, screaming, yeah.
[01:21:49] Speaker B: He's wishing he could. No, but, no, dude, it's not your universe. Different.
[01:21:52] Speaker A: No, like, you had to be there. Like, you saved everybody.
[01:21:54] Speaker B: I brought that up because, like, dude, in the movie theater at the end of it, movies over, the lights, gone.
[01:21:59] Speaker A: Here, fucking needle drop, right, dude.
[01:22:00] Speaker B: But, yeah, dude, nobody gets up right away. Like, this is a fucking theater full of people.
[01:22:04] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:22:05] Speaker B: Big bro. Like, we're all just, like, standing there, like, what the fuck did I just experience? What is life? What is happening?
[01:22:12] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:22:13] Speaker B: What am I? What I'm. Would you.
[01:22:14] Speaker C: Who are you?
[01:22:15] Speaker B: Like, everything is just, like, bewildering.
[01:22:16] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:22:17] Speaker B: Crazy shit, dude. He was so human.
[01:22:19] Speaker A: Oh, dude.
[01:22:20] Speaker C: It's.
[01:22:20] Speaker A: It's a natural. Great work. What's his face. Marlon Brando in his documentary said, like, the goal is to, like, get, like, you're sitting there watching a movie. You're eating the popcorn.
[01:22:30] Speaker C: Eating it. You're eating it. That.
[01:22:32] Speaker A: To have that, like.
Like, to stop that automatic. Like, when you do that, you stop the popcorn on the way to the mouth.
[01:22:38] Speaker C: Yeah, dude.
[01:22:40] Speaker A: That's when you're like, you've done that. Something is happening at a human level where you're like, holy fuck. Makes you stop and think it's crazy.
[01:22:49] Speaker B: Shit, dude, live for that shit.
[01:22:51] Speaker C: Crazy.
[01:22:51] Speaker B: That's why. Oh, that's why I'm going to make a point of my life to watch more plays than movies because plays will do that shit to you. But movies are kind of, like, kind of hit or miss, you know, because it's just so orchestrated for you. It.
[01:23:03] Speaker A: There's also shitty plays.
[01:23:04] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:23:04] Speaker B: I mean, thank. I haven't picked one yet. I think that's the one I was.
[01:23:07] Speaker A: In was pretty bad.
[01:23:08] Speaker B: The the gay one.
Don't I know it.
[01:23:12] Speaker A: That one is pretty bad.
[01:23:13] Speaker B: Fucking know it.
[01:23:14] Speaker A: But see, now with comedy, I.
The feeling where your abdomen hurts when you walk out. Like, it doesn't do the same thing of, like, sitting there going like, what is life? Like, what are we doing? What are we. But you go, oh, my God. I didn't think of that totally normal thing in that most bizarre way.
[01:23:33] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:23:33] Speaker A: Then I like it because as I get older, life keeps, like, hitting me in the nuts with a little hammer sometimes. And I'm like, I just want to feel good.
[01:23:41] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:23:41] Speaker A: You know? Because sometimes the day to day is just so hard, and I. Rather than feeling like, wow, I felt human, I just go, I want to laugh my ass off because that's what I need right now.
[01:23:52] Speaker B: Got that tonight, papa.
[01:23:53] Speaker A: And I can't wait. Tonight, if I can mention.
[01:23:55] Speaker B: Can I say the story? Remember the story I have about the play, the gameplay with the girl?
[01:23:59] Speaker C: Yeah, yeah. Okay.
[01:24:00] Speaker B: First, though, for the audience to know, this is a bad move for a first date. So first date, this girl from school. Like, yo, I'm gonna take her to my boys play. Yeah, it's my boy. He's fucking leading. Like, it's gonna look cool. I'm gonna say, what up after? And I know the actor. I know the actor. But also, you know, it's like, whatever. It's like, I was aware that it was a gay plan. So I'm gonna look like, you know, like I'm open minded and I'm cool and yada yada, because I, like, I genuinely am. I free love and all that. But the play was just much more homo erotic than I anticipated.
[01:24:25] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:24:26] Speaker B: And the girl was thusly creeped out.
[01:24:28] Speaker A: Yeah, she was a little bit.
[01:24:29] Speaker C: Look.
[01:24:29] Speaker B: Creeped out.
[01:24:29] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:24:30] Speaker B: Like, to the point where, like, you know, mid play, I'm like, all right, let me try to make a move here. Put my hand on her thigh. And the girl shooed me away, like, shoot me away, bro.
I had no idea this shit would backfire. So.
[01:24:44] Speaker A: Fucking told you that. If you would have told me that it was a first date, I would have. So it said to you, Joseph, Joseph, don't fucking do this. Don't do this. You will ruin it. Yo. Because it made you.
Let me understand.
You brought her in there. She probably sat there for the first.
For the first ten minutes. And she was going like. It starts off gay as fuck.
Just shy of a bukkake. And she's sitting there going like, all right.
[01:25:19] Speaker C: Okay.
[01:25:19] Speaker A: Like, all right, ten minutes, 20 minutes, 30 minutes. It's just getting progressively gayer. And the storyline is not lined up racialistic, dude. And she's probably thinking to herself, this sick wants to get. Wants me to watch him fuck a guy. That's what he wants. And now he's putting his fucking filthy gay hand on my leg.
[01:25:39] Speaker B: Yeah, like, getting turned on by the.
[01:25:42] Speaker A: Maybe you thought that she'd get turned on by. Yeah, I know some girls who saw me and they were like, that was kind of hot.
[01:25:47] Speaker B: Yeah.
[01:25:47] Speaker A: Which is shocking.
[01:25:48] Speaker B: Somewhere we totally turned off by mean.
[01:25:51] Speaker A: Well, case in point.
[01:25:52] Speaker B: Fucking clearly. I mean, Jesus Christ, I can't believe she is like, oil. It would be. Became old and water, bro. And meanwhile, like, you know, the reason I started the day was because, like, she was giving me some crazy signs, bro. Like, we were doing, like, procedures, like in nursing school. And like, she would. She was like, tough, facetiming your mom, like, this guy I'm doing procedures with. And like, I was like, no doubt. So I can't lose here. I'm fucking killing it. She was rushing.
No, I don't even know.
[01:26:15] Speaker A: She probably walked into her house at night and one mom, you will not fucking believe where this guy took.
He took me to a show where men were fucking on stage, basically.
[01:26:27] Speaker B: It wasn't short of a gate. It was like a soft queer.
[01:26:29] Speaker A: I wish I could have seen her face. Her face was probably like this.
[01:26:32] Speaker B: Like, it was uneasy. I bet. I don't know. I was having too much fun. I didn't even look at it.
[01:26:36] Speaker A: Yeah, you were jerking off.
[01:26:39] Speaker B: I don't know what the hell her face was like. I just know that the vibe was tense, bro. Vibe was you.
[01:26:45] Speaker A: I could feel it from the stage. I remember every day I had to do it. I was like, this is the worst. It fucked me up mentally for a while where I'm like, yo, I don't want to. I didn't want to act anymore. I'm like, this sucks. Yeah, man. It was. It was so, like, it fucked you up.
[01:26:59] Speaker B: Like, generally. Like, it made you generally, because it.
[01:27:01] Speaker A: Was like the first big show out of school, and I'm like, this is gonna be great. And it was such a terrible experience because I'm like, as I kept doing it and the more I was already sucked in, I couldn't quit at that point. I was like, this is just not a good show.
[01:27:15] Speaker C: It's just.
[01:27:15] Speaker A: It's just. Just this guy wants to watch men make out the whole time.
[01:27:19] Speaker C: Yeah. Like, it.
[01:27:19] Speaker A: There was no point to it. So there was no lesson in the show, like, at all. There was no resolution. There was no. The acting was. My acting was terrible because I just didn't care. Yeah, I was phoning it in. I.
[01:27:30] Speaker B: By the time I went to go see. Did you already have a few shows on the rebels?
[01:27:33] Speaker A: I maybe had one or two. I would say it was only, like a five or six show run.
[01:27:37] Speaker B: Were you, like, done with it?
[01:27:37] Speaker A: But I was. Yeah, I was done with it before it even started.
[01:27:40] Speaker B: Really?
[01:27:40] Speaker A: Yeah, because rehearsing showed you, like, even rehearsing it. I was like, this is so. Holy shit. Like, this is the guy. The director wasn't directing. I was. I was fed up, dude. And it made me just lose a lot of faith in. In myself.
[01:27:53] Speaker B: The director wasn't directing.
[01:27:54] Speaker A: He just wasn't directing the angles. That was great. That was great. You guys are great. And I was like, do you have any notes? No, just keep doing what you doing. I'm like, no, I need some.
[01:28:02] Speaker B: We're loving it. Roll over.
[01:28:03] Speaker A: Like, I came twice.
[01:28:05] Speaker B: More time. More time.
[01:28:06] Speaker C: Yeah, just.
[01:28:07] Speaker A: Just maybe, maybe suck on his cock. I'm like, it was so bizarre.
[01:28:12] Speaker B: Oh, my God. That's tough, dude. Because it was a lot of making out you had to do.
[01:28:15] Speaker A: It was so much, dude. If it was like, for the, like, brokeback Mountain was gay as fuck, but it was such a great story.
[01:28:21] Speaker B: It was emotionally gay. Like, it was a lot to it.
[01:28:23] Speaker A: There was a story that was like, okay, amazing. If you give me broke my mountain, I'll do it any day. But this was just give me two.
[01:28:30] Speaker B: Guys done double for I'll be a cocktail boy.
[01:28:34] Speaker A: But like, this was just shit, dude. It was total shit. And then I kind of that. I started making the films afterwards, which are fucking sick.
[01:28:43] Speaker B: You should all go watch them, by the way. Absolutely.
[01:28:45] Speaker A: Pretty good. You know, I sit back and I think about it sometimes. What time is it, by the way?
[01:28:48] Speaker C: I don't know. Check.
[01:28:48] Speaker A: You have to shower.
[01:28:49] Speaker B: No, no, I already. That's already done.
[01:28:50] Speaker C: I'm.
[01:28:51] Speaker B: I'm chilling. I'm just wanna get. You want to get food before.
[01:28:54] Speaker A: No, we can get a quick bite. We'll cut this in five.
[01:28:56] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:28:57] Speaker A: 835 right now.
[01:28:58] Speaker B: How long we going for? An hour.
[01:28:59] Speaker A: Over. Yeah, flew by.
[01:29:01] Speaker C: Um.
[01:29:01] Speaker A: Felt good, though.
[01:29:02] Speaker B: Yeah, very natural. Very, very natural.
[01:29:04] Speaker A: But yeah. Dude, I don't know, man. It just. Everything became so heavy and then COVID happened and like, I just like doing comedy more. Like, I just. I like it way before COVID Right? Before COVID It was in 2019.
[01:29:17] Speaker B: Like December.
[01:29:18] Speaker A: Earlier was like October.
[01:29:20] Speaker B: Okay, fine. I started my first semester of school. Yeah, so, yeah, it was probably okay. Okay. Okay.
[01:29:26] Speaker A: But yeah, dude. And then I started doing comedy like a couple months after that, and I stopped for a while and started again. Stop for a while. Like every fucking thing in my life.
[01:29:33] Speaker B: This comment I get, you know, every time I watch kill Tony, dude, amazing. I get so excited for you. Did you watch a recent episode?
[01:29:39] Speaker A: No, I didn't.
[01:29:39] Speaker C: I've been.
[01:29:40] Speaker A: I've been slacking because I've been writing one.
[01:29:41] Speaker B: Dude, it's a musty episode. Cuz I don't know. I'm the kind of kill Tony fan. I hate when bad comedians come up. I love when the good comedians come.
[01:29:48] Speaker A: I like when that ones come on some grace.
[01:29:50] Speaker B: Be cringe. I hate bad comedy. Bro back.
[01:29:52] Speaker A: Yeah, but then Tony rips them.
[01:29:53] Speaker B: No, but it's fun when he rips them. There's still a whole minute of garbage have to get through and I hate but something.
[01:29:58] Speaker A: You know what? For me, it. Sometimes it goes like. Because I'm such a harsh critic of myself.
[01:30:02] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:30:03] Speaker A: I watch and I go, oh, God, I'm not the worst. Like, this is bad. This is really bad. Like, I'm not great, but this really sucks. Not some shit, which is not nice.
[01:30:11] Speaker B: But, but, dude, those motherfuckers always talk about like, yo, I went on to show once and everything. You know, our doorstar, dude.
[01:30:17] Speaker A: I. I fucking, I had tickets to go in July, and then the shit hit the fan with my life.
[01:30:22] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:30:22] Speaker A: And I had tickets, but I couldn't afford to get out there.
[01:30:24] Speaker B: And would you invite me if you want to go watch?
[01:30:27] Speaker A: I would be definitely. I'd be like, yeah, come. It's 1 minute. You know, I have. I definitely have a minute. I got more than a minute. I got like five.
[01:30:33] Speaker B: You have to, like, take a chance that they're not gonna hit you up. That's the thing. It's like, put your name.
[01:30:36] Speaker A: Well, that's the thing. I would just have to trip. I would have to. What I would do is I'd have to book a trip to Austin. Like, okay, this is vacation. And then Monday night, go there to sit in the club to watch. It's like, okay, we're gonna have a good time tonight. Put my name in and maybe they won't call me. Maybe they will. That's the thing. I would do it, but I think I have some stuff that I think is funny.
[01:30:57] Speaker C: Yes.
[01:30:57] Speaker B: I'm sure you have ready that you would do up there.
[01:30:58] Speaker C: Yeah, I have.
[01:30:59] Speaker A: I'm. I'm probably gonna go up this week. I have a, I've been writing so much. I'm back in the groove of, like, where's the funny? Because for a while I was like, nothing's funny. Everything sucks.
And there's some, some. I'm fucking. The thing is I'm gross. I like gross shit, right? I, and I don't come off that way. Like, if you meet me, like, if a girl met me and like, oh, you do comedy. Like, I'd love to see it. And I'd be like, no, no, no, you don't. You don't want to see it because it's, it's all gross shit about eating ass and jerking off and, and, you know, doing drugs. It's not like what you'd think.
[01:31:34] Speaker C: It.
[01:31:35] Speaker A: It's more, I think, like bro humor.
[01:31:37] Speaker B: Yeah, definitely.
[01:31:38] Speaker A: But if you're like a girl that can hang and like, well, dude, right.
[01:31:40] Speaker B: Now the bro humorous are killing it right now. Like the biggest comedians in the world right now. Shane jealous.
[01:31:45] Speaker A: Killing guys on Tony.
[01:31:47] Speaker B: Yeah, Rogan's. Anybody who Rogan co signs yes touches once everybody's blowing up. Those are all bro people, dude. Especially Shane jealous and changes he's on.
[01:31:56] Speaker A: And they fired him before, which is amazing.
[01:31:57] Speaker B: He's a quintessential bro. And that shit's taken off.
[01:32:00] Speaker A: Well, that's the thing. I love that kind of humor. And, like, I'm writing jokes.
[01:32:03] Speaker B: Harrison, the moment, the zeitgeist of history.
[01:32:05] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:32:06] Speaker B: Right now, I think that, like, this.
[01:32:08] Speaker A: Is the time to jump in for.
[01:32:10] Speaker B: Not for anybody, but for someone with your style. I think that there's something to be said here. You know, you're not irrelevant. Like, your style of humor is not irrelevant. It's topical. It's. It's there.
[01:32:18] Speaker C: Dude.
[01:32:18] Speaker B: It kind of fits with. There's someone just. In evaluating art. In evaluating art, I tried try to buy art, I think is going to get bigger in price. And what I. What I learned is the, um. That art is subjective.
[01:32:30] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:32:30] Speaker B: History is objective.
[01:32:32] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:32:32] Speaker B: So, right. Good. Art fits into history in such a way.
[01:32:35] Speaker C: Yes.
[01:32:35] Speaker A: You show up at the right time, in the right place and the person. And when. When this part, the world needs to hear this kind of thing right now.
[01:32:42] Speaker B: Yeah.
[01:32:43] Speaker A: I personally think that maybe, you know, obviously. Yeah, sure. I believe that. Because of me.
[01:32:48] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:32:48] Speaker A: But I. I do think so. I think it's like, yo, if it was a couple years ago, it'd be like, no, no, this is not the time for this. But maybe a couple years ago was when I needed to really start to get. Get the wheels going where people would shit. Like, dude, I have. I'll say it here because I. No one's coming to fucking see me. Like, I have a joke that it's so. California created this thing called Ebony Alert. It's basically the same thing as Amber Alert, but instead of gets kidnapped. Yeah, exactly. But instead of locating the missing kids, they locate the missing fathers.
I left an integral part.
Sorry. No, I wasn't for.
[01:33:24] Speaker B: I thought you were straight up telling me.
[01:33:26] Speaker A: The joke is they created this thing called Ebony Ler. It's the same thing as Amber Alert for black people. But instead of locating the missing kids, it's to locate the missing fathers. Like that, to me, it's a fucking cheap, gross joke. But I'm like, I think it's funny. And it's like, if I think it's funny, maybe someone else will, and maybe someone will think I'm a racist, which I'm not, but whatever. Like, I'm gonna go and tell the joke I could hit, you know? There's another one of, like, I have this terrible problem where I go out, I meet a girl, I take them home, and. And I can't get it up. Like, it's a big fucking problem with me. I'm one of these guys that needs a fucking connection. I just do. There's a word for it. It's, um.
No, it's. It's called gay.
[01:34:02] Speaker C: That's.
[01:34:03] Speaker A: That's the punchline. That's the punchline. The punchline. It's gay. Oh, gay. It's fucking gay is what it is. That's.
[01:34:09] Speaker B: I'm like, fuck the.
[01:34:10] Speaker A: No, it. No, it shows that we are both idiots.
So there's shit like that. And I'm like, you know what? I don't. I want people to feel good. I want people to laugh. New York's a tough place to do jokes like that, but it's.
[01:34:23] Speaker B: Is it? Dude, I went to an.
[01:34:25] Speaker C: It's half. Half.
[01:34:26] Speaker B: It's like, it's getting. I want to say it's getting better. Maybe I'm just, I love New York so much. I'm.
[01:34:29] Speaker A: You go to Bushwick and tell those jokes to probably be. You're insensitive.
[01:34:32] Speaker B: Don't go to Brooklyn.
[01:34:33] Speaker A: I would want to, though.
[01:34:34] Speaker B: Maybe hit the city.
[01:34:35] Speaker A: Here's the thing, though. I want to go to those places too, because it's like, yo, if I can deal with those people hating me, yeah, I could deal with the people.
[01:34:42] Speaker B: So maybe I'm not a fucking artist for me. But Tony has said, like, you could go to a club where the people just suck, audience just sucks, and then you think you suck because they suck. So it could be, like, giving you an inaccurate gauge of what's funny.
[01:34:56] Speaker C: Yes.
[01:34:56] Speaker A: But at this point in my life, and, like, how I'm pursuing it, like, I have to assume that I'm not that funny. I can't be like, oh, it was the audience. Like, no, no, I'm not good enough yet for me to blame.
[01:35:06] Speaker B: You got to know your audience too, right?
[01:35:07] Speaker A: Like, here's the thing. Rogan had said, like, when you go to open, because when you're doing, like, shows I'm doing, I do open mics. So it's all comedians there. No one's sitting there. Like, I paid for a ticket.
[01:35:17] Speaker C: Laugh.
[01:35:17] Speaker A: You know, it's like they're, like, sitting there, like they're waiting for their time. They're not really listening. And if you hear, like, and I had this a lot in LA, you'd get like a. Huh? Like just one of those. You're like a pity.
[01:35:28] Speaker C: Laugh. I'm good.
[01:35:29] Speaker A: No, it's not pity.
[01:35:29] Speaker B: It's real.
[01:35:30] Speaker A: It's a good thing because it's like, okay, the other comedians who are busy in their own heads waiting for their time to go up who aren't actually listening. If they go like, huh. That's the equivalent to an actual laugh from someone who's there really listening to a. You understand. I'm saying if you just get like a. Hmm. Or like a light, something, just someone. Okay, I'm on the right path.
[01:35:49] Speaker B: It hits someone. So it could probably hit other people.
[01:35:51] Speaker A: It hit a comedian who's not really listening, who's trying to think of his. Waiting for his turn to go up.
[01:35:55] Speaker B: Right.
[01:35:56] Speaker A: So it'll hit someone who's actually paying.
[01:35:57] Speaker B: Attention, someone who's, like, less invested.
[01:35:59] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:36:00] Speaker B: So, yeah.
[01:36:00] Speaker A: And someone who's actually telling jokes.
[01:36:02] Speaker C: Right.
[01:36:02] Speaker A: You know, someone who understands the. The sort of, like, how the pudding is made.
[01:36:05] Speaker C: Right.
[01:36:06] Speaker A: So that's when you go like, okay, I'm on to something here. It may not be constructed the right way, but it may. I may be on some.
[01:36:12] Speaker B: It's a thread worth going down. I see.
[01:36:13] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:36:14] Speaker A: And someone had once told me it was really nice. The fucking dude really made my day. He had said to me, he's like, how long you've been writing jokes? I'm like, like, if you add up all the time, maybe six months, maybe eight. And he said, he's like, because you have a good presence. He's like, you. You're good at joke writing. I was like, and this guy is a really nice guy.
[01:36:32] Speaker C: A little.
[01:36:33] Speaker A: Little odd, but I was like, thank you, man. Like, I. Little shit like that. Like, yo, when you're back, we're going full circle. Like, you. Your presence has an effect on somebody else in their day.
[01:36:44] Speaker B: Like, how you approach them, even in littlest ways.
[01:36:47] Speaker C: Most.
[01:36:47] Speaker B: I take that from when I was doing homeless outreach.
[01:36:49] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:36:49] Speaker B: Some of these homeless people, they have never even been asked in decades. Like, hey, how was your day? How are you doing today? They don't even get looked at, which are neutral.
[01:36:58] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:36:58] Speaker B: There is a people. Invisible people. So, like, when you like, just to me, that, like, that opened up, like, a world of possibility for world that you're in.
[01:37:05] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:37:05] Speaker B: Like, if. If people in, like, the bottom ring of society, like, they don't even get a, hey, how you doing?
[01:37:10] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:37:11] Speaker B: And when you give them a, hey, how you doing? You just brighten their day. Maybe the week, maybe the rest of.
[01:37:14] Speaker A: Their life, or maybe they'll stab you.
[01:37:19] Speaker B: Hasn't happened, dude. You'd be surprised at how safe I felt doing homeless outreach and how safe, like, even, like, you should, there's. There's a healthy dose of fear you should have. You never know. But on the whole, like, when you get used to it, you get used to it. Like, you start knowing the clients on the street, and you're just like, it's my boy. It's Rick.
[01:37:36] Speaker A: Yeah.
[01:37:36] Speaker B: It's almost fucked up situation, but he's.
[01:37:39] Speaker A: It's crack at Daryl.
[01:37:41] Speaker B: Yeah. He needs a little help, man.
[01:37:42] Speaker A: You remember crack it there?
[01:37:43] Speaker B: Of course I do.
[01:37:44] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:37:44] Speaker A: Cracking salesman.
[01:37:45] Speaker B: Yeah.
The most dedicated crack.
[01:37:48] Speaker A: Daryl the crack smoking salesman.
[01:37:49] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:37:51] Speaker A: Anyway, I think it's time to go. Let's go to the comedy show.
[01:37:54] Speaker C: All right.
[01:37:55] Speaker A: Thank you, guys. Thank you, fuckers. Appreciate it. We're back. I don't know how often I'll be doing it, but I'm going to try to keep it on a regular schedule. Thank you, guys. Peace.
