# 16 - The Proud Girls

[00:00:10] Speaker A: All right. [00:00:10] Speaker B: Coffee. [00:00:11] Speaker A: All right, we're back. We got Cam Bird, Eli Moroney, Joe Gerbo. There was a bit of a technical difficulty. We were talking pre come. That's right. Is it. [00:00:17] Speaker C: Is it. Wait, hold on. Is it pre come or is it projectulation? [00:00:21] Speaker A: No, ejaculation's different. That's like, when you prematurely eject. That's. No, I don't have that problem. But I met someone I really like, and it's like, when I'm around them, my dick is, like, half hard. Even if I'm, like, smelling this person, it's like half hard. And I. The whole day. It's love, dude. I think so. The whole day I'm like, yeah. And I go to the bathroom and my fucking underwear is covered in cum. [00:00:45] Speaker C: He's like a coffee drip constantly throughout the day. [00:00:49] Speaker B: So many. [00:00:49] Speaker D: Okay, so maybe you have prostate problems. [00:00:51] Speaker A: I don't know. [00:00:52] Speaker B: But this normal. [00:00:52] Speaker A: But I give myself blue balls. That's the problem is that it's like. Because it's constantly flowing. There's. I. By the end of the night, I'm like. If I don't soon, I'm in pain. I'm like. Literally, my nuts are killing me. [00:01:02] Speaker B: But you start coming before you even. [00:01:04] Speaker A: It's. But I'm not. It's just a little dribble, that's all. [00:01:06] Speaker C: But it's coming. [00:01:08] Speaker A: I mean, it's. I hope it's. [00:01:09] Speaker C: There's water going down the slide, but nobody's sliding down. [00:01:12] Speaker A: That's exactly right. The water is this. [00:01:14] Speaker B: I. I don't pre. [00:01:14] Speaker A: You don't precom. I've never My pre. I just am like. [00:01:17] Speaker D: Yeah, I've never. [00:01:17] Speaker B: I've never pre. [00:01:18] Speaker C: I think. But doesn't everybody pre come? It's like. It's the little. It's the. That comes out right before you come. [00:01:23] Speaker B: No, dude, I'm telling you, not right before. [00:01:25] Speaker A: Like, maybe the whole time before. [00:01:26] Speaker D: I mean, you. Yeah, yeah. It's like a little. Not the tiny little orgasm before the big orgasm. [00:01:30] Speaker A: I think we're getting. [00:01:31] Speaker C: We're getting. This is the vernacular. We're getting all mixed up here. [00:01:35] Speaker A: All right. [00:01:35] Speaker D: Does it. Do you get, like, an orgasmic feeling? [00:01:37] Speaker A: No, no, there's no. [00:01:39] Speaker B: It just comes dripping out. [00:01:41] Speaker A: It's just. Yeah, it's like you have a leaker. [00:01:43] Speaker C: It's clear. You guys. You guys all. [00:01:45] Speaker B: I've heard. No, I haven't. I've heard about the clear pre cum before. [00:01:49] Speaker A: Wait. [00:01:50] Speaker B: But I've never experienced it. [00:01:51] Speaker A: So your dick is completely dry before you put it in Dude, I have. [00:01:53] Speaker B: Two states, either cumbed or uncombed. Yeah, there is no medium. [00:01:59] Speaker A: Yeah. And you've had. You've had the drip, dude. [00:02:01] Speaker C: Yeah, of course. [00:02:01] Speaker A: Okay. Yeah. [00:02:02] Speaker B: Wow. We're split by. [00:02:04] Speaker A: This is crazy. [00:02:04] Speaker B: Comers and non. [00:02:05] Speaker A: This is the pre come side. [00:02:06] Speaker D: Is this a Jew thing? No, you're not a Jew. You're a Jew. [00:02:09] Speaker B: I'm a Jew. [00:02:09] Speaker D: And you're. You're. [00:02:10] Speaker A: No, it's not a Jew thing because he's. [00:02:11] Speaker B: No, no, we're split. [00:02:14] Speaker C: You said you have two states. [00:02:15] Speaker B: Yeah, I have two states. Either I'm not coming or I'm coming, and there's no state solution. [00:02:19] Speaker D: I'm also. [00:02:20] Speaker B: I'm also. How hard could it be, you guys? [00:02:23] Speaker A: Two states. I'm either a man or I'm not. That's it. [00:02:27] Speaker B: So, okay, so when you come clear, shit comes out first and then come. There's like a little. There's a seal that needs to be broken. [00:02:33] Speaker A: Yeah, a little bit. Yeah. [00:02:34] Speaker B: And then when you're just always coming, I'm just always. [00:02:37] Speaker A: I have dry, I have dried come on every. Every pair of underwear. When I see Cam drip. [00:02:42] Speaker B: You would. [00:02:43] Speaker D: You're only human. [00:02:44] Speaker B: You're like. You're like an automobile doesn't pass inspection. Just all the streets that. You're like a snail. You can always fucking find you. There's a streaks of C in the street. You're like, Harrison was here. [00:02:58] Speaker C: That's actually how I found my way here. [00:03:01] Speaker B: Oh, look it. [00:03:02] Speaker C: There's a little trail of come. Well, look at this, dude. Imagine. Imagine having to borrow a pair of Harrison's underwear. [00:03:10] Speaker A: I never will. You don't want. If you guys need swim trunks for the beach, don't take them. [00:03:16] Speaker B: Can you do me a favor? Just like, next time you're pre. Coming, can you just let me know? [00:03:20] Speaker A: I'll call you, dude. I will call you and let you know. I promise you. [00:03:23] Speaker B: Call me like. Yeah, Especially if, like, nothing overtly sexual is happening. I want to know. [00:03:27] Speaker A: It's. It's. But it's. This is new. This is real new for this. This is a new thing. Well, I've always pre. Come before sex, like a little bit, but I've never. [00:03:36] Speaker B: Wait, before sex or before you come during sex? [00:03:38] Speaker A: No, before sex. Like before. Like, before I even put it in. It's like, oh, there's a little bit of a. You know, a little. [00:03:43] Speaker B: Is that normal? Is it normal to start coming before any sex has begun? [00:03:48] Speaker C: The only way that I. Yes, I think the. The best way I can, like, describe it is that, like, sometimes if you're. If you're kissing on someone, you know, you're doing something, and then you take your pants off and you see your underwear, there will be, like, a little spot. [00:04:01] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:04:01] Speaker C: And it's just your. It's like. Like how a woman's vagina gets. [00:04:05] Speaker B: I can't wait to read the comments on this video. [00:04:07] Speaker C: I think urethras get a little bit wet. [00:04:09] Speaker B: Well, yeah, they get a little bit wet. So you can get in there. [00:04:11] Speaker A: Yeah. Yes. It depends on. [00:04:13] Speaker C: Some people are wetter than others. [00:04:14] Speaker B: You know, I mean, I get. I get shit. Streaks in my underwear, but I've never had it. [00:04:19] Speaker C: Well, never had. [00:04:20] Speaker B: Just some. [00:04:20] Speaker D: Dude, watch. Dude, watch. [00:04:21] Speaker B: Dude. Wipes. [00:04:22] Speaker C: Yeah, I was gonna say that's a wiping issue. That is. [00:04:24] Speaker A: Yeah, that's. Yeah. [00:04:27] Speaker B: All right, now the tables have turned. Let's not pretend that we don't all sometimes get streaks in our underwear. [00:04:32] Speaker A: All right, Dude, I don't want to. [00:04:33] Speaker C: Play a higher than in a minute. [00:04:35] Speaker B: What? [00:04:35] Speaker A: It's been a minute. [00:04:36] Speaker B: What? [00:04:36] Speaker A: But I also wear black underwear, so. [00:04:38] Speaker B: You have no idea, dude. [00:04:39] Speaker D: When I used to ride dirt bikes, I would often end the day and there'd be a streak in my. [00:04:46] Speaker B: Yeah, that's called being a human being. [00:04:48] Speaker C: That's how you knew it was a good ra. [00:04:51] Speaker A: Why dirt biking? [00:04:53] Speaker D: Well, you're going over bumps because it's sweaty. You're grinding up and down that seat. Yeah. [00:04:58] Speaker A: Dude, is there. Is there a Sibian on your motorbike? Sibian is like a. It's like a saddle with a vibrator. [00:05:04] Speaker B: We have so much to teach each other, you guys. So much to learn from each other. [00:05:08] Speaker C: Wait, why does he know what a Sibian is? [00:05:13] Speaker B: Legendary. [00:05:13] Speaker A: They have. So. Yeah, they always have women on the Sibian. But Hoya, we were also talking about who. Who's tasted. There. Come. [00:05:19] Speaker B: Oh, so, like. All right. [00:05:20] Speaker A: This is so disgusting. [00:05:22] Speaker B: I've never, like, intentionally. I never, like, put it in a Dixie cup and was like, you know, I mean, what. What is this all about? [00:05:29] Speaker A: Me neither. [00:05:29] Speaker B: No, but, you know, we were talking about, you know, when you were a younger. Younger man. Younger boy. And you're like. You have. You're doing something. [00:05:37] Speaker D: Yeah. [00:05:37] Speaker B: And then something happens. [00:05:38] Speaker D: You shoot yourself in the face. [00:05:39] Speaker B: Accidentally shoot yourself in the face. [00:05:40] Speaker A: That's happened. [00:05:41] Speaker D: It's happened. [00:05:42] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:05:42] Speaker A: Yeah. But you said you have a weak shot, right? [00:05:46] Speaker B: That's because he's pre. Have you worn. [00:05:49] Speaker C: I said. I said I have a lazy shot. [00:05:51] Speaker A: Lazy shot. [00:05:52] Speaker C: Because I've never. I've never cummed in my own face. [00:05:54] Speaker D: Oh, bro, you missed out, brother. Dude, I've. I've, like, come above my head. Like, the pillow above. Same. [00:06:00] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:06:01] Speaker A: Do you. [00:06:01] Speaker C: And then do you mark it on the wall? [00:06:03] Speaker A: It's like when you're a kid, when you're like, your mom does the drawings. Like, oh, you're five, eight now, dude. It's sick. [00:06:08] Speaker C: That was me four years ago. There's nothing like me now. [00:06:13] Speaker B: There's nothing like it. And you can only achieve it when you're a younger man. But when you hit the full rainbow. [00:06:18] Speaker A: Oh, no, dude, my shots have gotten. I'm telling you, the edging, dude. The edging. You. You get there, you stop. You get there, you stop by this by hour two of jerking off when I'm in. In it. Just be careful. You're not, like, out of the thing. Yeah. By hour two, I. Dude, I put a dent in my toilet seat once. [00:06:33] Speaker B: What, with your comb? [00:06:35] Speaker A: It was. Dude, it really hit it. Yeah. [00:06:38] Speaker C: I've heard that the more you retain your semen, it's like. It's like wrapping a coil around, like. [00:06:45] Speaker B: Indeed. [00:06:45] Speaker C: And just builds tighter and tighter and tighter. The band gets tighter, and then I would imagine when you release, it's like. [00:06:52] Speaker B: Yeah. Then you can shoot pretty far. Speaking of which, I want to get back to Cam's bedtime routine. [00:06:56] Speaker A: Oh, yeah, please talk to. [00:06:57] Speaker D: I still have questions about this, my bedrock time routine. [00:07:00] Speaker A: All right. [00:07:00] Speaker D: Meditation. [00:07:01] Speaker B: That's good. [00:07:02] Speaker D: Masturbation. [00:07:03] Speaker A: Okay. [00:07:03] Speaker D: And reading MMR. [00:07:05] Speaker A: Dude, we were talking about it yesterday. MMR. [00:07:07] Speaker D: I meditate for 20 minutes, and then I masturbate for 5, 10 minutes to completion. To. Not to completion. [00:07:13] Speaker A: He doesn't finish. [00:07:14] Speaker D: I don't finish. [00:07:15] Speaker B: No, you practice semen retention. [00:07:17] Speaker D: It's just. It's just a discipline practice that I. I'm like a Buddha. I'm like a Buddhist monk now. [00:07:22] Speaker C: Did you. [00:07:22] Speaker A: Did you practice under Andrew Tate? Is that what you. [00:07:26] Speaker B: Where can top G. Where are you when you're doing this? [00:07:30] Speaker D: So I sit down. I have a meditation. [00:07:31] Speaker A: He's on the Q train. [00:07:33] Speaker D: And I have a meditation mat and a pillow. I sit down on the end of the bed on the ground. [00:07:40] Speaker B: So your meditation mat is at the end of the bed with a pillow. Is it always there? [00:07:44] Speaker D: Yeah, I fold it up at the end of the night and put it away after. It's cool. Yeah. [00:07:49] Speaker B: It's just so funny that he has, like, a little masturbation pad. That's where Cam Jack's off. [00:07:55] Speaker D: Just to, you know, just for. It's like longevity, you know, Keep the strength down there, I do. So when I start my meditation, I'll start with doing some kegel exercises as well. [00:08:05] Speaker B: What? [00:08:05] Speaker D: Yeah, man. [00:08:06] Speaker B: Wait, so I do it, though? [00:08:08] Speaker D: Yeah. So you know what a kegel is when you kind of, like, tense? [00:08:10] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:08:10] Speaker B: Yeah, but you're doing, like, basically right. [00:08:12] Speaker D: I'll do, like, 30, like, hard, like. And then I'll do, like, 10, like, holding for, like, five seconds, and then release. And then I do reverse Kegels, where I breathe in, and then you push down, and then I do my meditation. [00:08:26] Speaker B: I'm doing this right now, by the way. [00:08:27] Speaker A: Dude, I wish I was his wife. [00:08:30] Speaker B: Are we allowed to say your wife's name on the pod? [00:08:31] Speaker D: Yeah, of course. [00:08:32] Speaker B: Okay. All right. So Mel knows. Yeah. Mel. What's she doing while you're doing this? [00:08:36] Speaker D: She's usually, like, on a laptop. [00:08:37] Speaker A: Yeah. You're in a studio apartment. [00:08:38] Speaker D: Yeah, she's right there, but I. I have a little. [00:08:41] Speaker B: Does she see you when you do the trick? [00:08:43] Speaker D: She could, but I have. [00:08:44] Speaker C: Sitting on his. [00:08:44] Speaker D: I have a mirror. I have a mirror stand that I turn and I give myself a little barrier. Just have a little bit of progress. Do you watch yourself a lot? [00:08:52] Speaker B: Is the mirror facing you? [00:08:53] Speaker D: No, the mirror is the other way. [00:08:54] Speaker B: Oh, so you're not watching. [00:08:55] Speaker A: Looking into your own eyes is fucking sick. [00:09:00] Speaker C: Just squeeze. [00:09:01] Speaker B: So have you ever been in bed? Have you ever been in bed with Mel? Like, getting ready to go to bed, and then you're like, I need to do my bedtime routine. So you get out of bed and go on the ground, and then. And then edge yourself and stretch your. [00:09:13] Speaker D: Butt and get back every single night, bro. Dude, I can't go to bed now without doing my routine. [00:09:18] Speaker B: So you're in bed and out of bed to do Kegels and Jack. Is this not. This is the funniest thing. [00:09:25] Speaker A: What would you got? [00:09:26] Speaker C: So do you practice semen retention even when you're having sex? Like, you don't fit. Okay. [00:09:31] Speaker D: Never. You. [00:09:32] Speaker C: So you can hold it for a while? [00:09:33] Speaker D: Absolutely. Yeah, I'll hold it. I'll hold it until I have sex. So it could be a week? If it's two weeks, it's like, you. [00:09:38] Speaker C: Almost decide when you're gonna come. [00:09:40] Speaker D: No. Fuck, no. When I'm. When I'm having sex. So usually. So if I haven't had sex for, like, a week, it's pretty quick. [00:09:47] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:09:47] Speaker D: But then the next night, I usually. This is how I usually go. This is kind of my routine. We're normally, like, a week. Right. It'll be a Week. Then, yeah, one night, I'll come pretty quick. The second night, that's where I'm like a ball built up a tolerance a little bit. And then after the second night, I'm a. I'm another weak guy. And that's when I do my retention, my Kegels, my training. [00:10:06] Speaker C: So you go from like one pump chump to two hour power? [00:10:10] Speaker D: Not two hour. God, no. That's way too long. That's like 15, 20 minutes. [00:10:13] Speaker C: That's what I'm saying, dude. I got to do. [00:10:16] Speaker D: Yeah, I don't know. Like, I. Do you guys like doing like a two hour session is all right when. [00:10:22] Speaker B: You shouldn't last that long. [00:10:23] Speaker D: When you're on. When you're high or drunk, that's fine. But if you're just stone cold. [00:10:27] Speaker C: So when you're drunk or went like the, the honeymoon stage with somebody, that's when you're just fucking non stop. That's when it's kind of fun. But I feel like the, you know. [00:10:36] Speaker B: If somebody doesn't come within 30 minutes, you're doing it wrong. [00:10:39] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:10:40] Speaker A: Well, here's the. [00:10:40] Speaker D: Do you guys use toys? [00:10:42] Speaker A: I will if there is. If there's any of my disposal, I'll use them. [00:10:45] Speaker D: Yeah. Pretty regularly. Nearly every time. [00:10:47] Speaker C: Like a Barbie or like, I'm like. [00:10:50] Speaker D: A trained dog, man. You know how like you tell the dog to like get its toys? Like if we're gonna have sex, I go to the cupboard, get a toy out. I'm like, done. Let's go. [00:10:57] Speaker C: Do you crawl into the be. [00:11:00] Speaker B: I thought you were gonna say like. [00:11:01] Speaker C: You have like, the vibrator's just going off your mouth. [00:11:05] Speaker B: I thought you're gonna say you have like a Pavlovian response now. Like a vibrating cell phone. [00:11:09] Speaker C: And you'll be like, oh, Jesus, they have those. They have vibrating butt plugs that you can. [00:11:14] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:11:15] Speaker D: Really, Joe, Tell me about those. [00:11:16] Speaker A: Hold on, let me, Let me just heard. Turn, Jo. Let me turn. Joe's on right now. [00:11:23] Speaker C: Yes, master. [00:11:25] Speaker A: Yes. All right. No, you're a good. Shut up. [00:11:28] Speaker C: Oh, God. [00:11:29] Speaker A: You're not allowed to come until we say. [00:11:31] Speaker C: Oh, my underwear is filled with pre. Come right now. Oh my God. [00:11:35] Speaker A: And streaks. [00:11:38] Speaker C: And skid marks. [00:11:42] Speaker A: There's no way these mushrooms kicked in yet, but I feel like they have. [00:11:45] Speaker B: We're covering a lot of ground here, dude. [00:11:47] Speaker A: When I was. Dude, I have a pro. I was. I. I feel like we're having the same conversation. But I have a problem where I. I be because I have so much pent up, like rage. I I'm very happy guy. But when it comes to. I wanted to go for as long as I possibly. What, the demons. The demons come out. I become a different, like, the kind nice guy that everyone knows doesn't exist. [00:12:10] Speaker B: Hear that? Lady's dream, man. [00:12:11] Speaker A: No, seriously, I'm not trying to be, like a jerk off here. I'm being dead serious. Like, I was too recently. I'm. And sure there was some alcohol involved, and then, you know, she'll get hers a couple times. In this case, there have been times where they never get theirs, but. And then I will come and I'll go right back in. I'm like. I'm like, I don't want to. It's. It's. It's almost like being in the Freud, like stuck in a Freudian state. [00:12:38] Speaker B: Hard after you came. Yeah, you come and you say school. [00:12:40] Speaker D: Boy, man, that, like, I could do that when I was like, 17, 18. [00:12:43] Speaker A: I'm telling you, I think it's the gym, dude. I'm telling you, I've never been in better shape. And I. I'm like, yeah, yeah, it's. It's crazy. I mean, it's. It's not normal. I don't think. There's no way that that's, like, even healthy. There's something probably wrong with me. [00:12:57] Speaker B: It's not normal. It's exceptional. [00:12:58] Speaker D: Yeah, it's amazing. [00:13:01] Speaker A: It's fun. It's. [00:13:02] Speaker B: If I don't for, like, two months, I can, like, come and then still be hard. [00:13:06] Speaker A: Oh, if I don't for two months, I'll come in 30 seconds. [00:13:08] Speaker B: Yeah, no, but that will come in 30 seconds. But, yeah, no, normally I think, like. [00:13:15] Speaker A: Well, what do you. All right, let me ask you guys this. What's your favorite? Because I'm a very. When it comes to, like, positions, what's your favorite? Let's go around the room, dude, I'm. [00:13:23] Speaker C: Gonna bore you guys. I love missionary. [00:13:28] Speaker A: Me too. Because I want to look at us bunch of softies. [00:13:30] Speaker C: I want to look in a woman's eyes when she's lying to me. To me. [00:13:37] Speaker A: It's like I want to look in their eyes when they don't look good. [00:13:39] Speaker C: And I'm like. [00:13:39] Speaker B: She's like, fake coming and he's doing the Larry David thing. [00:13:43] Speaker A: So what you do, you scream liar in her face. [00:13:49] Speaker C: I. I don't know. Yeah, I've always liked missionary. [00:13:51] Speaker A: And like, when I. [00:13:52] Speaker C: When I watch porn, like, I always end on missionary. I always end on a missionary video. [00:13:56] Speaker A: Wow. [00:13:57] Speaker C: I just like to splay it out. [00:13:58] Speaker A: Like, so you're basically just watching Sesame Street. [00:14:01] Speaker C: That's. [00:14:01] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah, yeah. [00:14:02] Speaker C: I'm basically. [00:14:03] Speaker A: Actually. [00:14:03] Speaker C: What I do is I throw on my. My parents honeymoon video. [00:14:09] Speaker A: All right, that was weird. [00:14:11] Speaker C: Cut it, Jamie. Cut that. [00:14:16] Speaker A: What do you like I'm a doggy. Huh? No. Well, here's the thing. If I don't know you and we don't have a connection, don't even look at me. I don't want to know who you are. [00:14:23] Speaker C: Doggy or bag on the head? [00:14:24] Speaker A: Bag on. It's actually hands around the throat. [00:14:28] Speaker C: No, it's one hand on the throat and one hand covering. [00:14:30] Speaker A: Yeah, don't look at me. No, I like missionary, dude. I love a missionary. I like, also, like. I don't know how else to describe it. Like a girl's on their side. One leg is forward. The other one is kind of. [00:14:43] Speaker C: That's a good one. [00:14:43] Speaker A: Yeah, you can kind of lean over and kiss their face. [00:14:46] Speaker D: I like that. Good leverage on that one. [00:14:47] Speaker A: Yeah, that's a fun one. [00:14:48] Speaker D: Very comfortable as well. [00:14:49] Speaker A: It is. Doggy's fun. But I'll be like, I'll do it for a few. And then I'm like, all right, let's. Let's look at each other again and make each other sick. What about you? Hila. [00:14:56] Speaker B: Classic mesh dude. [00:14:57] Speaker A: Yeah, it's fun, right? [00:14:57] Speaker B: Yeah, classic Tom mesh. [00:14:59] Speaker A: Yeah, it's. It's. If it's with. If it's good sex, then missionaries. The best, I think. [00:15:03] Speaker B: Yeah. But then for porn, I need a facial. We're nothing in the face. [00:15:09] Speaker D: Yeah, I like a bit of face. [00:15:11] Speaker B: We do it together face. [00:15:12] Speaker D: Yeah. [00:15:12] Speaker B: Yeah, we do it together. That's what I like about it. [00:15:14] Speaker A: Okay. [00:15:15] Speaker C: The money shot is one of my least favorite parts of porno. [00:15:18] Speaker A: I'm too old for it. I'm like, nice. [00:15:19] Speaker C: I don't know. I just don't want to see another guy's jizz on a woman that I. [00:15:23] Speaker D: Like to see how the wind. Yeah, I like to see how she receives it. [00:15:27] Speaker B: Yeah, she's a good sport. [00:15:28] Speaker A: Well, when you're getting paid, you should put a smile on. [00:15:30] Speaker B: You know, you don't do that in real life. [00:15:33] Speaker C: At least be cheery. [00:15:34] Speaker A: Yeah. You chose to be. What about you, Cam? What do you got? [00:15:39] Speaker D: I got two. So girl on top. [00:15:41] Speaker A: Oh, that's a good one. [00:15:42] Speaker D: Girl on top facing me. [00:15:43] Speaker C: Yes. [00:15:44] Speaker D: I like to. I like to see the breasts. [00:15:45] Speaker B: I like that too, but I've never finished that one. [00:15:47] Speaker D: And I got a new favorite lately. It's when the girl puts the heels on and bend her over the Kitchen sink. [00:15:54] Speaker A: Oh, that's nice. Do you need the heels on or no? [00:15:57] Speaker D: Well, if she's short, it helps. [00:15:58] Speaker A: It helps. [00:16:00] Speaker B: It's all about counter size, really. [00:16:01] Speaker A: We call it. [00:16:02] Speaker C: We call that the divorced mom. [00:16:06] Speaker B: Really? [00:16:06] Speaker A: I like. I also call it. Now, that is a good one. What about the. The leg? One leg on the kitchen counter. The other one she's standing. [00:16:15] Speaker B: Oh, that's a good one. [00:16:16] Speaker A: That's a fun one. [00:16:17] Speaker B: I like that one. Yeah, you can spread the leg out on something and then reach around. [00:16:21] Speaker A: Yeah, that's a good one. That's a fun one. [00:16:23] Speaker B: Half turn is fun. [00:16:24] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:16:24] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:16:25] Speaker A: And it's nice because it's in the kitchen. And you're like, this shouldn't be done here. [00:16:27] Speaker D: I also like on. When you put them on the kitchen bench. Yeah, they're sitting on the kitchen bench. [00:16:32] Speaker A: Wait, kitchen bench. [00:16:33] Speaker D: You sit them on the kitchen bench. You spread their legs and you wait. [00:16:36] Speaker A: Like a chair. [00:16:37] Speaker D: Kitchen counter. [00:16:37] Speaker A: Oh, the counter. Okay. Oh, that's a good one. I'm so short, though. I. I gotta get. I do struggle, dude. It's hard. [00:16:43] Speaker B: It's real hard. [00:16:44] Speaker C: You guys started talking about counters. [00:16:46] Speaker D: I was like, you need to wear the heels. [00:16:48] Speaker A: I'm the one ing heels. [00:16:53] Speaker C: Imagine he's in the middle of it and he's like, can I actually get those a little? [00:16:58] Speaker B: What about elevation? [00:17:01] Speaker C: Standing on my tippy toes right now. My calves are hurting. [00:17:03] Speaker B: Tippy toes. I bet you guys have done this before. You ever stand on your tippy toes? Because the angle is just not quite right. [00:17:07] Speaker A: Always. [00:17:10] Speaker C: I'm five foot six. [00:17:11] Speaker B: Yeah, that's a fun one. [00:17:12] Speaker A: I like a girl who's my height. Also. That's a problem you need. If you're. Unless you're with a really short girl, It's. It's impossible. You have to. Literally, a shower. You got to be on your tippy toes. There was one girl I dated once. We could not in the shower because she's too tall. She's too big. It was. You couldn't do it. Couldn't do it. [00:17:26] Speaker B: The shower is overrated. [00:17:28] Speaker A: Well, someone's always a little cold. That is so true. [00:17:34] Speaker B: And the. But okay, so what's good about it is I'm never the cold one. Yeah, the water's trickling down my back. You know, that feels good. Anyway. [00:17:40] Speaker A: That's nice. That's nice. Hot water going down the back. [00:17:42] Speaker B: That's nice. [00:17:42] Speaker C: Yeah, it's always nice when, like, you're getting head in the shower and then you look down and she's just getting drenched with Water from your. From your chest and everything you start. [00:17:50] Speaker B: That's so fun. [00:17:52] Speaker A: In our case, that's not water. It's pretty. [00:17:54] Speaker D: In the shower, walking in the shower, it got too hot. And I don't know if for what it was, but I kind of like. I was like, oh, I feel light headed. And I had to like. [00:18:02] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah. [00:18:03] Speaker A: Were you doing drugs? [00:18:05] Speaker D: It's possible. [00:18:08] Speaker A: It wasn't the shower. [00:18:09] Speaker D: Let's do the rounds. How did you lose your virginity, Eli? [00:18:13] Speaker B: In a tent at my. [00:18:15] Speaker A: So Jewish dude. [00:18:17] Speaker B: Yeah, I was in a tent in the woods. [00:18:18] Speaker C: So I was in a tent. [00:18:20] Speaker A: I was camping with my uncle. I was 8. [00:18:25] Speaker B: I went to the. [00:18:26] Speaker C: He said he loved me. [00:18:28] Speaker B: I went to the junior semi of one of my friends. Went to a different school. [00:18:32] Speaker A: What the is a junior semi? [00:18:33] Speaker B: It's like prom for juniors. [00:18:34] Speaker A: Okay. [00:18:34] Speaker D: Okay. We call it a semi formal. [00:18:36] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah, yeah. [00:18:36] Speaker B: And I met this random girl. My buddy slipped a condom into my pocket. I lied to her. I told her I wasn't a virgin. [00:18:43] Speaker A: Oh, smart. Yeah, that's a good move. Okay. [00:18:45] Speaker D: She was like, why did you have to lie to her? [00:18:46] Speaker B: Experience. [00:18:46] Speaker D: Why would she care if you were? [00:18:48] Speaker B: She wouldn't have. [00:18:50] Speaker C: Because it's like when you tell a booker, like, oh, I've been doing comedy for five years. It's like, you're probably going to get booked. [00:18:55] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah, that's a good point. That's a good way to put it. Yeah. [00:18:57] Speaker B: She was a sweet lady. [00:18:58] Speaker D: Until he books you and then he's. [00:18:59] Speaker A: Like, all right, you've been doing comedy for three weeks. Oh, yeah, dude. [00:19:03] Speaker B: The illusion definitely fell apart as soon as we got into it. She was like, she has never done this before. [00:19:08] Speaker C: You're crying. Your underwear is filled with shit stains in your underwear. [00:19:15] Speaker B: Guys, we all get shit stains in your. Wear shit yourself. Everyone gets shit stains. [00:19:21] Speaker A: Fine. [00:19:21] Speaker B: I got shitty underwear. [00:19:23] Speaker A: Okay. No, it's a marker. How'd you lose your. Your virginity? [00:19:25] Speaker C: I lost my virginity. I was a. I was an altar boy when I was 12. No, I lost my virginity. I think it was like, freshman or sophomore year of high school during Christmas break. [00:19:40] Speaker A: Oh, okay. [00:19:41] Speaker C: And, yeah, it was this girl that went to the local public school. I went to private school and she. [00:19:45] Speaker B: Went to public school. Look at us crossing school lines. [00:19:47] Speaker C: Yeah, yeah, yeah. I felt real dirty. [00:19:48] Speaker B: Does that make us, like, cool or not cool school that we went outside of our school system to lose our virginity? [00:19:54] Speaker C: I know. I think it's. I think it's. I think it's fine. I don't know if it's yeah, well. [00:19:58] Speaker D: I only went to an old boys school, so I didn't really have much. [00:20:00] Speaker A: So you lost your virginity there. [00:20:02] Speaker C: You guys have sister schools, right? [00:20:04] Speaker D: Yeah, but you don't necessarily beg your sister. [00:20:06] Speaker B: Dude, it's gross. [00:20:08] Speaker D: What? [00:20:09] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:20:09] Speaker C: What's wrong? [00:20:09] Speaker A: What was the ethnicity? [00:20:13] Speaker C: Italian. She was Italian chick. [00:20:14] Speaker A: What about you, Eli? What was she? Jewish girl. [00:20:16] Speaker B: I have no idea. [00:20:17] Speaker A: You don't know? [00:20:17] Speaker B: No, I think she was Italian. [00:20:19] Speaker A: Italian. Okay, nice. [00:20:20] Speaker C: Were your eyes closed the whole time? [00:20:22] Speaker B: Just white. Just a white girl. That's all I know. [00:20:25] Speaker A: What about you, Kim? [00:20:26] Speaker D: I had a false start and then I had a real time. So false start was at the. At a party. I was hooking up with this girl. It was her party. And then we started having sex on her front lawn. [00:20:39] Speaker A: Oh, nice. [00:20:40] Speaker D: Yeah. And project. There were people walking past and her dad came out, grabbed me by the hair, picked me up and goes, that's awesome. What the do you think you're doing? [00:20:50] Speaker B: That's look like I'm doing, champ. [00:20:53] Speaker A: Looks like I'm here. You got eyes. [00:20:57] Speaker B: That's pretty awesome. [00:20:57] Speaker D: I only like just got the tip in and that. [00:20:59] Speaker A: Well, that counts. Tip counts. Tip counts. It counts. [00:21:03] Speaker C: Any insertion counts? [00:21:05] Speaker D: No, I. I feel like it's ejaculation. Once you come, that's. [00:21:08] Speaker A: You got to complete. No, I. Well, a lot of. [00:21:10] Speaker C: A lot of guys. Yeah. Their first time, they don't come. [00:21:12] Speaker A: No. Not even that. I was going to say half the girls I've been with are now I was saying, dude, I can't even count them because I didn't come a lot of the time. [00:21:24] Speaker D: But did it count? [00:21:25] Speaker B: Your underpads, conversations. [00:21:27] Speaker D: As soon as you walked away, you pre. [00:21:29] Speaker B: Like check mark. Now it's done. [00:21:32] Speaker A: You guys making fun of the pre comers? [00:21:34] Speaker B: We're ridiculing you for precoming. [00:21:36] Speaker C: Okay, wait, wait. He brings up a valid point. [00:21:38] Speaker A: Point. [00:21:38] Speaker C: So there, there have been plenty of times that you haven't come. [00:21:41] Speaker A: Yeah, there have been a bunch of women. Now I gotta cut my whole. I don't have a number. I don't know how many women I've been with. I have no idea. Oh, no. [00:21:48] Speaker B: But like. [00:21:50] Speaker C: Do you also think that like having sex with a condom on doesn't count? [00:21:54] Speaker D: Doesn't count. [00:21:56] Speaker A: All right, I'm back to my regular numbers now. [00:22:00] Speaker C: I can count it on my hand. [00:22:01] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:22:02] Speaker C: 1. [00:22:03] Speaker D: Are you a condom guy? [00:22:05] Speaker C: No. I mean, not unless I. [00:22:08] Speaker A: The real question is, are you gay? Yeah. [00:22:11] Speaker C: Not unless I have to. [00:22:12] Speaker D: Yeah. [00:22:12] Speaker C: But I do have to quote a very. One of my favorite comics Phil Hanley. He has this great joke where he's like, a girl I. I love. Or isn't it the best when a girl. [00:22:23] Speaker A: How does he say this? [00:22:26] Speaker C: When a girl tells me that I don't have to wear a condom, that. [00:22:29] Speaker A: Is just the best way to get. [00:22:32] Speaker C: Me to wear a condom. [00:22:34] Speaker B: Not bad. [00:22:35] Speaker A: Oh, shut your eyes. [00:22:37] Speaker B: I wear condoms like, I pay my taxes, you know, like, only because other people told me to. [00:22:42] Speaker A: Yeah, that's. That's a good. Really? [00:22:44] Speaker C: I thought you were gonna say. [00:22:45] Speaker A: That's very funny. [00:22:46] Speaker B: That's on the thing. It's recorded now. [00:22:47] Speaker A: Yeah, you'll hear it. [00:22:48] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:22:49] Speaker A: Okay, so then. Okay, you had the false start. [00:22:51] Speaker D: Yeah. Then the second time was. Was a. Was with the girlfriend. We. [00:22:56] Speaker A: How old were you? [00:22:57] Speaker D: Sixteen. [00:22:57] Speaker A: Okay, sick. [00:22:58] Speaker D: We took a boat over to an island, and it was at her auntie's house, and her auntie goes off to the bowls club, and we have sex in her auntie's bed. Now, this girl, turns out, was a squirter. [00:23:11] Speaker C: Was a squirter. [00:23:12] Speaker D: Full squirter. [00:23:13] Speaker A: How old is she? How old was she? [00:23:14] Speaker D: Same, same. [00:23:15] Speaker A: And did she know she was a squirt? [00:23:17] Speaker D: No, it was her first time as well. But when we finished, there was a pool of wet, like, one meter in diameter. That's three feet for you losers. [00:23:25] Speaker A: Thank you. [00:23:25] Speaker B: And thank you for that, Cam. [00:23:26] Speaker A: And, yeah, I was about to ask. [00:23:29] Speaker D: And it was in her auntie's bed, and it was drenched, and I was like, what the do we do with this? We start getting the hair dry on it. We're like, couldn't. Couldn't do anything. So I just pulled the doona back over and just went into our room and left it. [00:23:42] Speaker A: And did you ever hear from the aisle? [00:23:43] Speaker D: Never heard. Her auntie never said boo the next day. [00:23:45] Speaker B: It would have been hilarious if you got caught twice in a row. That would have been super fun. [00:23:49] Speaker D: She wakes me up. She's like, what? [00:23:51] Speaker B: Why does this always happen? [00:23:55] Speaker A: So. Wow. You. [00:23:56] Speaker D: It was Precom. [00:23:59] Speaker B: Ain't no such thing, brother. Precom's a lie, dude. [00:24:02] Speaker A: You guys bro free comes. [00:24:03] Speaker B: Not even real, dude. Start spreading this rumor. Preco's not real. [00:24:08] Speaker D: Joe. [00:24:09] Speaker A: Joe went already. [00:24:09] Speaker D: Oh, sorry. [00:24:14] Speaker A: So we got. So what. Okay, 16. What do we got here? [00:24:16] Speaker B: I think I was 15. [00:24:17] Speaker A: 15. [00:24:17] Speaker C: That was 15. [00:24:18] Speaker A: 15. That's solid. Those are solid. Those are like the huge. You guys know this? [00:24:23] Speaker C: Oh, that's right. [00:24:24] Speaker A: You guys, 12. Were you 12? [00:24:26] Speaker B: Really? [00:24:27] Speaker A: I was. [00:24:27] Speaker B: You were 12 in that story? [00:24:28] Speaker A: Oh, yeah, 12. She was 16 and I was 12. And I'm trying to figure this out on stage. I've been trying to figure this out, but it's not funny because it's just a child molestation joke. But yeah, she. Here's the thing. This girl. This girl. I've spoken about this before. This girl came over. She was my sister's friend. She came over one year when I was 11 and jerked me off in my living room. [00:24:49] Speaker C: Such a saint. [00:24:50] Speaker A: Yeah, in my living room. My parents. This is like 7pm and there was a blanket over me. And she was just kind of like resting her head on my lap and I was like, what the is going on? [00:24:59] Speaker B: I've seen this scenario on pornhub. [00:25:01] Speaker A: Legit, dude. [00:25:01] Speaker B: Your parents at home, dude. [00:25:03] Speaker A: Here's the. Here's where it gets really sick. And this is probably why I got issues sometimes sexually, which I'll get into later. But I'm sitting there and she's like arresting her head here. And there's a blanket over here, but her head's on top of the blanket. And she like starts. She goes for it and she starts fucking jerking me off. And this, I guess at 7pm everyone's there and my parents are in. Come into the living room at some point, and she doesn't stop. And I'm getting jerked off in front of my mom and my dad. [00:25:28] Speaker D: Did I see it? [00:25:29] Speaker A: My dad saw. My dad looks at me, goes, harrison, he goes, you good? He goes, you want to maybe. Why don't you get up? And he was fucking with me. I think he was kind of happy. He's like, all right, you know he likes pussy. I didn't really have a choice. If I like pussy, I could have loved cock. And it really wasn't. I didn't have a choice. Here I was held Cox Leagues. She's jerking me off. And then eventually everyone goes to bed again. And then later that night, she starts jerking me off, like in the living room again, where no one's. Everyone's asleep. And I felt like I was about to come. And I stopped. I said, what the fuck is going on? This is before. I didn't really even jerk off, you know, I didn't know. [00:26:06] Speaker B: First calm, dude, this. [00:26:07] Speaker A: I almost did. And I stopped her. I was like, I don't know what's about to happen. Year. Fast forward a year later. My sister, sweet 16, she's invited and this girl's troubled, and she's not exactly hot, but she's. She. She had. You would love her. She had giant tits. Giant. And then she comes over. The sweet sweet 16 happens. We go home. And she's staying over the weekend, and she's. We're in, like, the other area of my house, and she's doing the same thing. And she looks at me, she goes, so, what do you want to do? I was like, I don't know. And she goes, do you want me to blow you or do you want to? And I'm looking at her and I'm like, what is this language that this woman is speaking? I don't even know. And I looked at her and I go, I. Whatever you want. Like, I don't know. And I never said what I wanted. And she's like. She just gets up and she goes, okay, let's go. And she goes up to my bedroom and I go to the bathroom because. And I look at myself in the mirror. Like, I remember it like it was yesterday. And I go, oh, my God. Like, I think this is about to happen. We go upstairs. I had trouble getting it up at first, and then eventually it happened and we're doing it. I was her. My sister was in her room and sleeping, and I'm banging some chicken. All I could think about the entire time was, my friends are never gonna believe. And I went to. Yeah. And my dad found out shortly after, and he was like. Shook my hand. It was different. It was different time, dude. It was different time. It was like, all right, good for you. You know, you're a man. [00:27:23] Speaker B: I really wish that you had your first orgasm. Like, not alone. That would make. That would be such a unique thing. [00:27:29] Speaker A: I mean, technically. I mean, no, I've. Since that. Between that year that went past, I'm sure I jerked off in between. I figured it out. But yeah, dude, it was. I. I fucking. As I got older, when I was younger, it was like a really cool to lose. Like, oh, that's how I lost it. As I got older, I'm like, I fucking wish it wasn't that way. You know, I had a therapist who convinced me in la. He was like, you were molested? I was like, no, I wasn't. I was just cool. And he goes, no, no, you were. Every session he reminded me I was molested. And then after, I was like, this guy, like, what the fuck is he trying to do to me? [00:27:57] Speaker C: Does he want me to be molested? [00:27:58] Speaker D: Yeah, he's just jealous. [00:27:59] Speaker A: Yeah. He's like, I want to molest. Yeah. But yeah, that was more. I fucking. That went dark. My bad, guys. [00:28:06] Speaker B: No, no, it was. Interesting story. [00:28:08] Speaker C: No, it's cool, man. Just, you know, maybe don't. [00:28:10] Speaker B: Molestation Light, I'd say maybe didn't get. [00:28:13] Speaker C: Raped when you were younger? [00:28:15] Speaker A: I don't know. It's. It's. You ever had a situation where you were with maybe were you guys having had issues, like where there was an adult that kind of creeped you out? [00:28:24] Speaker B: Trying to think? I'm thinking about it really genuinely. [00:28:26] Speaker A: Yeah. I don't know. [00:28:29] Speaker B: I'll let you know if anything comes to mind. I'm sure there have been. There have been creepy. [00:28:31] Speaker A: Or if not that, maybe some, like, horrifyingly ugly girl, like, forced you to her. [00:28:36] Speaker B: Oh, yeah, sure. You know, someone who drinks. [00:28:38] Speaker A: Like, I didn't put up much of a fight, but yeah, yeah, yeah. [00:28:41] Speaker B: I mean, yeah, totally. Like, I would get, like, drunk in college and then like, blackout and then like, come to and I'd be like, inside, like a ugly girl. And I'd be like, oh, no, what happened here? [00:28:51] Speaker C: Can you get molested as an adult? Because, I mean, I don't know. [00:28:54] Speaker B: I don't think it counts. [00:28:55] Speaker C: But that would be really funny though, to like, hook up with an ugly girl and then the next day be like, guys, I think I was molested last night. [00:29:04] Speaker A: A woman can get molested, but men, as an adult, can you? [00:29:08] Speaker B: I'll tell you a weird one. When I was in college, I passed out at like, a dorm party, okay. And I woke up and there was cake all over my genitals. [00:29:21] Speaker A: Dude, that was just you making a mess. [00:29:23] Speaker C: Well, I had you walking pied you. [00:29:26] Speaker B: I had no idea what happened. But here's the kicker is I woke up cake all over my genitals. At first, it's funny. And I'm like, oh, haha. [00:29:33] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:29:33] Speaker C: Got cake on my dick. [00:29:34] Speaker B: I got cake on my dick. What happened here? And then my mom calls me and I forgot we were supposed to get brunch that morning. [00:29:40] Speaker A: Oh, no. [00:29:41] Speaker B: So my mom. [00:29:41] Speaker A: Oh. [00:29:42] Speaker B: And also I was drawn all over. [00:29:43] Speaker A: Oh, boy. [00:29:44] Speaker B: So I had like, dicks on my forehead and cake. [00:29:46] Speaker A: Like, mom, I ate already. I had cake for breakfast. Yeah. [00:29:49] Speaker B: So I'd been drawn all over. So, like, my friend whose house I was in was very nice and let me, like, shower and everything. And I was like, dude. And before I left, I was like, who rubbed cake all over my fucking nuts? [00:29:59] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:30:00] Speaker B: And he was like, I have no idea. And I was like. And I was like, I bet it was those cute girls. We were talking. I bet they rubbed cake on my nuts. Dude. [00:30:08] Speaker C: Couldn't get enough of me. [00:30:10] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:30:10] Speaker B: And then, you know, I go have brunch with my mom on My way back, I found this kid we were hanging off. His name was. I shouldn't say his name. It was a kid who was like, obviously, like, you guys are gonna know exactly where this is going. But it was a kid who was like, not out yet. Oh, like a not out gay kid. [00:30:25] Speaker A: Yeah. Closeted homosexual. Yeah. [00:30:26] Speaker B: And I found him passed out in. [00:30:27] Speaker A: The dorm room hallway with cake on his face. [00:30:31] Speaker C: He had his cake and ate it, too. [00:30:33] Speaker B: Anyway, long story short, he rubbed the cake on my dick. [00:30:38] Speaker C: Yeah. Just the way you tell that story, it's like you had cake on your dick and then dicks all over your face. It's like you went to gay prison for a night, got all tatted up. [00:30:48] Speaker B: That's the closest thing I ever came into. [00:30:50] Speaker D: If he wants. You dig? Why? [00:30:51] Speaker A: Maybe he was hungry. [00:30:52] Speaker B: Well, it was like so, like, smeared too. [00:30:54] Speaker C: I don't have any forks. Eli's heart. [00:30:58] Speaker B: It is a little disturbing, isn't it? [00:31:00] Speaker D: Yeah. [00:31:00] Speaker B: I think that's the closest I ever came to molestation. [00:31:02] Speaker A: I think you were. [00:31:03] Speaker B: I think it was probably molested. [00:31:04] Speaker A: Yeah. The guy maybe liked my dick. [00:31:08] Speaker C: He will convince you that you were molested. [00:31:10] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:31:10] Speaker B: Yeah. Well, what are you gonna do? Hope he's well, you know. [00:31:13] Speaker A: Yeah. Good for him. Yeah. Whenever you're out there, probably working it. [00:31:15] Speaker B: Hope you have a nice relationship with another man now and you don't have to rub cake on their dick. [00:31:20] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:31:21] Speaker B: I hope you just hope it all worked out. [00:31:23] Speaker A: I feel like you. I don't know about molesting. I don't think you've ever been less. I feel like you have been in situations where you've been like, either someone's mom or had a real opportunity to like an older woman. Came like you came home from, like, in your friends. No, no. You come off like that guy, you're. [00:31:38] Speaker C: A MILF for sure. [00:31:39] Speaker D: Never a mil. [00:31:40] Speaker A: Never. [00:31:41] Speaker D: Nah. [00:31:41] Speaker A: Why? [00:31:42] Speaker C: Too old. [00:31:43] Speaker D: I haven't had the opportunity. [00:31:44] Speaker A: Oh, I gotta call my mom. You want to get her over here? [00:31:48] Speaker D: I'm sure I could have. I just. Yeah, no, I'm trying to think. If I've had any really negative experiences, nothing's coming to my mind now. [00:31:54] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:31:55] Speaker D: Yeah. [00:31:57] Speaker B: Joseph, what are we even sharing right now? [00:32:00] Speaker A: Molesting or like, now mill fucking? [00:32:02] Speaker C: I guess just like you have an. [00:32:03] Speaker A: Opportunity where your friend's mom came on to you. [00:32:06] Speaker C: No, no, I was a. I was. I was a late bloomer. I mean, I don't think I even got good looking until I hit, like, 29. So. [00:32:14] Speaker A: Last year. Yeah. [00:32:15] Speaker B: What was going on with your two Years ago. [00:32:18] Speaker A: I don't know, man. [00:32:18] Speaker C: I just. I'm a late bloomer. [00:32:20] Speaker A: I don't know. [00:32:21] Speaker B: You're right. [00:32:22] Speaker C: No, I don't think I ever. I don't think I ever got molested. But also, that is like, the best way to convince somebody that you were molest. [00:32:29] Speaker A: Like. No, I never been. Me. [00:32:32] Speaker C: I've blocked it out. If I have been molested, I blocked it out of my memory. [00:32:36] Speaker A: That's a. It's a. It's a weird thing that, the blocking. You guys remember your childhood? Yeah, like, vividly. Like, I. There. I don't remember anything from like, six or five and younger. I have no recollection. [00:32:47] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:32:48] Speaker A: Craziest thing, I feel like I have. [00:32:49] Speaker C: I. There's a couple of, like, my first memory. I remember being like 4 years old and telling a woman, like, I'm 4. And then you came online. [00:32:57] Speaker A: Is that what. [00:32:58] Speaker B: Seriously, is that when you came online? Like, what, like your first. First memory? [00:33:01] Speaker C: My fur? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like. Like when I awakened. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was probably that or I remember watching Rugrats in my family living room. [00:33:11] Speaker A: And then, I don't know, then going to. [00:33:14] Speaker C: Yeah, these aren't good memories. [00:33:16] Speaker D: I can remember a lot of things. I got a very good memory. I've had very, very early. [00:33:19] Speaker C: You know what? I can remember the first time we did cocaine. [00:33:22] Speaker D: Nice. [00:33:23] Speaker A: Awesome. [00:33:24] Speaker B: I don't remember that. [00:33:25] Speaker A: I remember vividly. [00:33:25] Speaker B: I don't remember the first time I did cocaine. [00:33:27] Speaker D: God, it was so bad when I first started doing it because I didn't know anything about it. And it, like, looking back now, in. [00:33:33] Speaker B: Hindsight, it was scared rubbish, bad cocaine. [00:33:35] Speaker D: And you know, when you're like 21, 22, you're just getting crap. [00:33:40] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:33:41] Speaker D: But at the time it was still. [00:33:42] Speaker B: Because who's really to say if you remember the first time you did cocaine, if the first time you accidentally did. [00:33:46] Speaker D: Meth, Like, I mean, I've done that. [00:33:48] Speaker C: As well, but that was that Molly for sure. Definitely. [00:33:52] Speaker A: Taking Steve Irwin, the crystal meth hunter. [00:33:57] Speaker B: What was he gonna say? [00:33:57] Speaker C: Oh, you guys, he was railing gators for sure. [00:34:02] Speaker B: I heard this Louis CK joke the other night about, like, the. His first memory that just made me laugh so much. [00:34:08] Speaker D: And it was. [00:34:09] Speaker B: He came online in the middle of shitting his pants. [00:34:13] Speaker D: What do you mean? [00:34:14] Speaker B: Came online like his first. Like, you were in the. You're in the haze. You're in the haze of early childhood. [00:34:19] Speaker A: Yes. [00:34:19] Speaker B: And then suddenly, like, he just logged. [00:34:21] Speaker C: On to the Internet. [00:34:22] Speaker D: Yeah. [00:34:22] Speaker B: Your autonomy, like, starts. And for him, it was like half the Shit was in his pants and the other half was in his butthole still. And the dilation of his butthole is. [00:34:32] Speaker A: What woke him up. Wow. [00:34:34] Speaker B: Holy shit. [00:34:36] Speaker D: I remember my. [00:34:37] Speaker C: I'm alive. [00:34:37] Speaker D: My earliest memory is. Is. Is kind of similar. I. Well, I. Not. Not in the same. But I. I remember going to the toilet. It's like I just started going to the toilet on my own. And I can remember I used to get mum to, like, check if I'd wiped it properly. And I can remember I remember going, mom, check. And I'd sit there, like, let bed over ass cheeks. I did that too. [00:34:58] Speaker C: And my mom would always look and be like, yeah, you're good, Joe. [00:35:03] Speaker B: Good moms, dude. Shout out to the moms. Yeah, they put up with a lot. [00:35:05] Speaker C: That's fucking hilarious. I thought I was the only one. [00:35:09] Speaker B: Can you trust a child to wipe? [00:35:14] Speaker C: My underpants are always clean, dude. Can I ask you this? Because this is something that I do, and I don't think these guys do it. When you're in the shower, do you spread your cheeks and, like, let the water. [00:35:23] Speaker D: Oh, yeah. [00:35:24] Speaker C: Thank you. [00:35:24] Speaker A: Wait a minute. [00:35:25] Speaker B: Great question, great question. [00:35:27] Speaker A: Hold up. What do you mean you spread it and let the water run down? [00:35:30] Speaker B: Exactly what it means. [00:35:30] Speaker C: I. So what I'll do is I'll take the bar soap and I'll get it on my, like, cheeks. Yeah, I take my hand and you. [00:35:36] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah, yeah. [00:35:38] Speaker C: And then I turn around and it's the gayest thing that I do. And I go like this a little. [00:35:42] Speaker B: Bit and then let it all drain out. [00:35:44] Speaker A: No, I don't do that. [00:35:45] Speaker C: I do perennial. [00:35:46] Speaker B: You get the karate chop up in there. [00:35:49] Speaker C: I do like a. Yeah, you gotta. [00:35:51] Speaker B: Get the karate chop. You do credit card. [00:35:52] Speaker D: Yeah. You gotta give it a claim back in. [00:35:56] Speaker A: In what? [00:35:58] Speaker B: Yeah, I miss what? [00:35:58] Speaker C: You just got to push the hemorrhoids back in. [00:36:01] Speaker A: That's how it works. That's cold, dude. [00:36:04] Speaker C: What do you do with your genital warts? [00:36:06] Speaker A: Where are your wife's toys when you're doing this? [00:36:10] Speaker B: They're in the shower rack right next to the shampoo. [00:36:13] Speaker A: All right, let me get the bu. [00:36:15] Speaker D: I used to. I used to get bad hemorrhoids, so that was a part of my process. I have to, like, push back in. [00:36:20] Speaker B: Pop it back in. [00:36:22] Speaker D: This is when I was blue. [00:36:23] Speaker B: How did the hemorrhoids begin? I'll do it. [00:36:29] Speaker A: That's. [00:36:29] Speaker B: That's a pity. [00:36:30] Speaker D: Have any of you? Have any of you. [00:36:33] Speaker C: I'm coming right now. [00:36:35] Speaker B: They're always coming, dude. Yeah, that side of the couch. How many three meters? Is that how wide the puddle was? [00:36:41] Speaker C: Oh, my God. [00:36:42] Speaker B: You're going for seven over there. Did you expect anything else? [00:36:46] Speaker D: Have any of you guys ever had a back injury? [00:36:48] Speaker B: Yeah, dude, all the time. [00:36:49] Speaker A: Throwing my back out a bunch. [00:36:50] Speaker D: Yeah, I'm currently dealing with one. [00:36:52] Speaker B: Oh, I got you. Lower back. [00:36:54] Speaker D: Lower back. But now it's starting to go to my neck. My bed. My lower back seems to be a little better. [00:36:58] Speaker A: What about acupuncture? You think about that? [00:37:00] Speaker D: I don't know. Yeah, whatever you guys do. Do for it. [00:37:02] Speaker C: You. There are yoga wheels that you can get and just lie on it. [00:37:06] Speaker A: Yeah. Open up. [00:37:07] Speaker C: Or you can. There's, like, yoga poses that you can do, like, where you get on a. Yep, yoga's great. You get down on the ground and you basically get on your. Your hands and knees and then you push out. It's. That'll. [00:37:16] Speaker B: I gotta stretch. That will fix it. Yeah. You have to lay on your back and it's hard to describe. I can show you. But it will fix it. I guarantee it. Because I've had so many lower back injuries. [00:37:26] Speaker D: Yeah. Brutal, isn't it? It's so debilitating. [00:37:29] Speaker B: It sucks. [00:37:30] Speaker D: Yeah. [00:37:31] Speaker B: I did it most recently when I was trying to move a frozen. I got it when it came out, my back went out. And then I, like, watched Disenchantment all day until I called my friend who was in medical school, and I was like, dude, I can't move. And he gave me the stretch and it works. Yeah. [00:37:49] Speaker D: Thank you. [00:37:50] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:37:50] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:37:51] Speaker C: I feel like if you do yoga, like, or you do stretching, right? [00:37:55] Speaker D: Yeah. [00:37:55] Speaker A: Yeah. You like yoga? [00:37:56] Speaker D: Yeah, I like yoga, but I haven't done it for a long time. [00:37:58] Speaker A: You should. [00:37:58] Speaker C: You should get back. [00:37:59] Speaker A: I'd love to go if you want to go to, like, a. I haven't been done it in a couple years. If you want to, like, do a class or something, I'd be down. [00:38:03] Speaker D: Yeah, I love yoga. [00:38:05] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:38:05] Speaker D: Yeah. I used to surprise. [00:38:06] Speaker B: This happens to you because usually, like, because you're in good shape. You run? [00:38:09] Speaker D: Yeah, I. I don't run anymore. [00:38:11] Speaker A: Running your backup, you stopped? [00:38:13] Speaker D: I've stopped. [00:38:13] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:38:14] Speaker D: I. I just go to the gym now. [00:38:15] Speaker A: Let's lift those weights, baby. [00:38:18] Speaker B: Well, strengthening the back will help you not. [00:38:20] Speaker D: Well, that's how I did it doing deadlifts. I think I went too heavy because I was doing deadlifts. I'm like, I'm feeling strong. I'm feeling strong. And then last week I upped the weight, dude, and I didn't feel it. It wasn't till the next day I. [00:38:34] Speaker C: Was like, oh, deadlifts are. They're so, like, they're great for strength and all, but, like, most people don't need to do deadlifts. Like, why, why do us, like, the four of us here, why do we need to be able to lift like 300 pounds from the ground? No reason at all. [00:38:51] Speaker A: I don't even. I don't live heavy regardless. And my thing for lower back is the back extensions, dude. I take a 25 pound weight, I hold them to my chest, just do back extensions. It keeps my. [00:39:00] Speaker D: Well, like on your. [00:39:01] Speaker C: On the bent, like the thing where they have decline. [00:39:03] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah. Where they, where you put your thighs and you're like leaning forward and like. [00:39:06] Speaker D: You lock your legs in the thing. [00:39:08] Speaker A: Yeah, that, that's too. [00:39:10] Speaker C: Like, if you work out your core, that's good for your back. [00:39:12] Speaker B: Yeah, Right. [00:39:12] Speaker A: Balancing it out. [00:39:14] Speaker B: I just started deadlifting, but I'm not doing £300. [00:39:17] Speaker D: No. [00:39:18] Speaker A: I don't know. [00:39:18] Speaker C: Deadlifts, to me are just. It's the easiest way to get hurt, especially if you don't. [00:39:21] Speaker B: Oh, dude, I can feel that. Like, yeah, if you have bad form, you can be like, oh, that'll so. [00:39:26] Speaker D: Hard to know because you think you got good form. You're like, all right, I've got everything straight. But I'll. [00:39:29] Speaker C: If nobody's ever showed you how to do it before, then you shouldn't be doing it. [00:39:33] Speaker A: Dude, it's like comedy. Like, oh, I think I got that five minutes down. And you're like, oh, no, I don't. I don't know what the I'm doing. It's. It's the same thing. You. You have to be working out for very long, and you also have to. The more you build the muscles, the more that you'll start to feel okay. Like, you know how you have to maneuver. You know what I'm talking about? You feel, okay, that's firing, that's perfect. And then if you don't feel it, you're like, okay, my form's bad right now. It's a constant adjustment. [00:39:56] Speaker C: Well, and then. But then you'll feel it in the wrong way too. [00:39:59] Speaker A: That's true. [00:40:00] Speaker C: You know, you're like, oh, okay, I've gone too far. [00:40:02] Speaker A: Yeah, it's. [00:40:03] Speaker C: It's better to start low and high reps and then work your way up. But like, I don't know, just deadlifts, to me, it's definitely like a hurt myself deadlifting before. I'm like, why am I doing this? [00:40:14] Speaker D: Yeah. [00:40:14] Speaker C: There's no reason at all. [00:40:15] Speaker B: I spend. Because I'm, like, new to it. I spend, like a good, like, I don't know, like, 40 seconds before each lift, like, thinking about and getting my form right. Yeah. I mean, like, I'll go down and I'll be like, nope, nope. Just push the shoulders down and like, straighten back. Back out. [00:40:27] Speaker A: But out. Yeah. [00:40:28] Speaker B: Like, I'll do that for a while before. [00:40:30] Speaker C: Yeah. And you got to start with no weight on the bar, so that way you get the motion down. [00:40:33] Speaker A: Yeah, that's right. [00:40:34] Speaker D: All right, I got a question, guys. So I just saw this. This article about this Australian guy that got bitten by a snake on his finger. And he panicked, and he didn't want the poison to spread through his body, so we cut his finger off, and it turns out that the snake wasn't poisonous. Now, Eli, what would you do with that situation? Would you cut the finger off or would you just. If you were two hours away from. From a hospital on a farm, and you knew, although you knew that there was a possibility you could die if you didn't do something, what would you do? [00:41:09] Speaker B: You have cell service, right? [00:41:12] Speaker D: Let's assume you don't. [00:41:13] Speaker A: Oh, that changed. I was gonna say Google. [00:41:15] Speaker B: Yeah, Yeah. I just try to get to the hospital. Probably wouldn't cut my own finger off. [00:41:20] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:41:20] Speaker B: If you die on the way. God's plan for you, brother. [00:41:24] Speaker A: I don't know, man. I have a. What if you bit you on the cock? Let's say you're down to cut your finger up. You bit you on the cock. At that point, I go, time to die. [00:41:32] Speaker D: Yeah. [00:41:33] Speaker B: Snake bites Harrison. [00:41:34] Speaker C: I would. Yeah, I would give it up to the snake, I think. [00:41:36] Speaker B: It's hard to find. [00:41:39] Speaker C: Good for you, man. Needle in a haystack. [00:41:42] Speaker A: The snake will bite my. My dick and go, ugh. Pre come. [00:41:46] Speaker B: I was trying so hard to get there. [00:41:48] Speaker C: Dude, the snake. [00:41:49] Speaker A: The snake. [00:41:50] Speaker C: The snake is looking up. He's like. Is pre come venomous? [00:41:54] Speaker D: This cuts his own head off. [00:41:58] Speaker B: I'm gay. No, I was going to say, you can't get a grip. Slips right off. Harrison's fine. [00:42:04] Speaker C: I knew it was a gay little thing. [00:42:07] Speaker A: Why don't you try harder next time? [00:42:10] Speaker B: Preup saved my life. So it'll never happen, cuz it's not real. [00:42:16] Speaker C: That's how Harrison would get rid of his own Preum. [00:42:18] Speaker B: Doesn't exist. [00:42:19] Speaker A: That would be. [00:42:19] Speaker C: Harrison's antidote to venom is just drink his own Pre. [00:42:23] Speaker A: Like, this has got to work. I mean, two hours away. The hospital's not There, I'm gonna drink my own comet. Like, whatever's got to be done, dude. [00:42:31] Speaker B: If Harrison's lost in the desert, he's gonna be losing so many fluids unnecessarily. I'll be walking around pre coming and he's gonna be like, guys, I'm dehydrated. Harrison, it's been two hours. [00:42:40] Speaker C: All right, wait, here, here's something. Here's something to think about. Have you guys seen the movie 147 Hours? [00:42:46] Speaker A: Or the one where they get 2700 with 127 Hours? Yeah, I never saw it. [00:42:49] Speaker C: It's a true story, right? So the guy, he falls into like this cavern and a boulder pinches his arm against the wall of whatever, you know, the mountain. And so his left arm is completely fucked. [00:43:04] Speaker A: He's got his right arm. [00:43:06] Speaker C: Would you not. Would your first instinct not to be like, I'm gonna get one more in? I think I would. [00:43:14] Speaker A: I would. [00:43:15] Speaker C: Because I wouldn't have the balls. That might be the last thing I do. Because I would not have the ball. [00:43:19] Speaker B: Jerk off, arm stuck in the rock. That's a crazy. [00:43:21] Speaker C: No, that's your left arm. Your left arm is stuck. So let's just. Okay, let's just assume it's your bad arm. Your bad arm is actually. It might be better if it's your good arm because then you can see. [00:43:30] Speaker B: If it's your good arm. There's a stronger case to be made for. No, sorry. If it's your bad arm. No, if it's your good arm. So like, I'm a lefty if my left hand stuck in the. Nevermind. It doesn't make any sense. [00:43:39] Speaker C: No, no, no. I think, I think I know where you're going. [00:43:41] Speaker D: What do you mean? You mean one, one last wank before you die? [00:43:45] Speaker C: Yeah, yeah, yeah. [00:43:46] Speaker A: So. [00:43:46] Speaker D: So you're saying you wouldn't cut your own arm off? [00:43:48] Speaker C: Definitely. [00:43:49] Speaker A: I think, I think at some point the survival kicks in and you go. [00:43:51] Speaker B: Yeah, I think at some point. Like, I wouldn't. [00:43:54] Speaker C: I wouldn't know how to. [00:43:55] Speaker A: I mean, I'm sure you start cutting, buddy. [00:43:57] Speaker B: She'll figure it out. [00:43:57] Speaker A: Dude. [00:43:58] Speaker C: The guy, he breaks his arm and then he just starts cutting in and then that he hits the nerve. [00:44:02] Speaker D: You'll figure it out. There was a guy in Australia last week, he. He jumped in these rapids in like New South Wales and his leg got stuck between two rocks. And this was an old guy's in like his 60s. They couldn't free his leg for 48 hours. He was in the water. They just Couldn't. [00:44:18] Speaker A: Free leg. [00:44:19] Speaker D: Yeah. [00:44:19] Speaker A: Okay. [00:44:19] Speaker D: And they ended up having to chop his leg off underneath the water and then airlift him out. [00:44:24] Speaker A: So is it salt water? [00:44:25] Speaker D: This is fresh water. [00:44:26] Speaker A: Oh, okay. That's good. [00:44:27] Speaker B: I love that you're so tapped into, like, Australian disasters. [00:44:31] Speaker D: It's a wild place, man. [00:44:33] Speaker C: It really is, dude. [00:44:34] Speaker A: To get your leg cut, imagine making it to 16. You're like, are you? [00:44:37] Speaker D: Yeah. [00:44:38] Speaker B: You got most of your life, two legs, dude. That's pretty good. [00:44:40] Speaker A: Yeah, I know that. But then you got to spend like, yo, at least if you lose a limb young, you can figure out how to live with it long. 60 years old. [00:44:46] Speaker B: If you use a leg. Yeah. [00:44:49] Speaker C: Worry about approaching women with a peg leg. [00:44:51] Speaker A: Yeah. But then what if your wife goes, ugh, you amputee fuck. Get away from me. [00:44:55] Speaker C: Then she would be right. [00:44:59] Speaker D: It would be horrible to look down at one of your limbs and seen it missing. I think that would be very. [00:45:03] Speaker C: People get those phantom feelings, you know, they get their leg amputated, and then they can still feel an itch in their toe. [00:45:09] Speaker D: Yeah, it's awful. [00:45:10] Speaker B: I was listening. You guys ever listen to the Therapy Gecko podcast? [00:45:12] Speaker A: The fuck is that? [00:45:14] Speaker B: It's like random people just, like, calling with their problems. [00:45:16] Speaker A: Oh, that's cool. [00:45:16] Speaker B: And there was. [00:45:17] Speaker A: This is a real therapist, though, I thought. [00:45:19] Speaker C: I thought it was, like, the guy. [00:45:20] Speaker B: He's not a real therapist giving people therap. He paints himself like a gecko and just talks to people about their problems. [00:45:25] Speaker A: I've seen that. Yes. [00:45:27] Speaker B: No degree at all. But there was one where someone called in, like, a week after blowing off their arm with a firework. [00:45:33] Speaker D: Oh, I've been seeing heaps of those. [00:45:35] Speaker A: Lately on my algorithm. [00:45:36] Speaker D: These guys, they're holding on to fireworks. They're letting, like, letting them off in their hands, and then they're like, oh, my hand. It's blown off. I'm like, what do you think was gonna fucking happen, you dickhead? [00:45:45] Speaker A: Yeah. July 4th. It's huge. Everyone gets. And someone loses all the X rays. [00:45:50] Speaker D: Of these just mingled flange. [00:45:52] Speaker A: Yeah. I was. I saw a funny meme that was like, don't play with fireworks. Like, the kid. Like, it was like an adult talking to a kid. Like, don't play with fireworks. Let the adults who've been drinking all day do it. [00:46:04] Speaker B: You ever do, like, a Roman candle. [00:46:06] Speaker A: Fight with your friends, dude, I've never done fireworks. I've never held a fight. I've watched them. I've never fucking held them. I don't do that shit. [00:46:11] Speaker B: I think it's crazy. Me and my friends used to shoot Roman candles at each other and try to hit him with baseball bats. [00:46:15] Speaker A: That's not smart. That's New Hampshire shit, dude. [00:46:17] Speaker B: That was pretty fun, though. [00:46:17] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:46:18] Speaker B: First you do dizzy bat. So you spin around, like, oh, yeah. And 23 times. And then everyone, like, shoots Roman candles at you. [00:46:23] Speaker A: That's kind of true. [00:46:24] Speaker D: I don't know. I don't. I. Somebody I got taught very early to. You got to watch your eyes. Like, dad. Mom and dad always watch your eyes. Don't. [00:46:31] Speaker B: I was wearing sunglasses for this. [00:46:32] Speaker D: Okay. [00:46:33] Speaker B: But I don't think it would have helped me if a Roman candle. [00:46:34] Speaker A: Honestly, dude, my idea of fun is just. Is. Is. Is just like, dude, I don't. I don't do. I don't want to do much else. I want to, like, have a drink with a hot girl, and, like, that's fun, you know? Yeah. Fireworks were never my thing. [00:46:47] Speaker B: What are we doing here? You guys could be drinking with hot girls even. [00:46:50] Speaker C: Even. Even at 12. That was your idea. [00:46:52] Speaker D: Fun. [00:46:52] Speaker C: You're like. [00:46:53] Speaker A: I mean, yeah, it's like, you guys. You fucking want to hang out with each other. [00:46:57] Speaker D: But while in the news this week, I don't know if you guys been following the Epstein case. [00:47:02] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:47:02] Speaker D: Did you follow this, Eli? [00:47:04] Speaker B: The last I saw. No list. [00:47:05] Speaker D: No list. [00:47:06] Speaker B: No list. [00:47:07] Speaker D: Did you see the video of the jail? [00:47:09] Speaker A: He's like, I hope my name's not on there. [00:47:10] Speaker D: There is a. There is a minute of footage missing. [00:47:13] Speaker B: Yeah, I know I did. Missing. I've been trying to write a joke about it. [00:47:16] Speaker D: Okay? So my theory is. My theory is a minute is not enough to send someone in to kill him and then come out. So my theory is it's more than enough he left that he's actually escaped. [00:47:27] Speaker B: So when I read the newscam, the first thing I did was look at my watch, and it's a minute and two seconds. And I just waited for a minute and two seconds and tried to think, like, if I had the keys, like, could I go in there, hang Jeffrey Epstein, and get out in a minute and two seconds? I think you could, dude. I think you could. [00:47:42] Speaker A: It's possible. Someone who's a trained killer. It could happen. Joe, dear, I don't think he's. I think he may still be alive. [00:47:48] Speaker B: Let's. Let's do a little reenactment. [00:47:51] Speaker A: Okay. [00:47:51] Speaker B: Yeah, let's do a little thing. All right. So, Joe, you're gonna time us? [00:47:55] Speaker A: Yep. Okay. [00:47:57] Speaker D: I'm gonna. [00:47:57] Speaker B: I'll. [00:47:57] Speaker D: Tom. I got my phone here. [00:47:58] Speaker B: You. Well, Joe's, gotta watch. All right, you'll be. Jeffrey Epstein will be killers. You're not gonna put up any fight. [00:48:04] Speaker D: All right. [00:48:05] Speaker B: All right. [00:48:05] Speaker A: Okay. I'm gonna swatch the coffee. [00:48:07] Speaker B: All right. Yeah, well, coffee's empty. [00:48:08] Speaker A: Okay. All right. Minute. [00:48:09] Speaker B: Minute. Two. [00:48:10] Speaker A: All right. [00:48:13] Speaker B: Well, it's not a long walk. [00:48:14] Speaker A: Yeah. It's a short sell. All right. [00:48:20] Speaker D: All right, all right. I'm a dirty Jew. My name. [00:48:30] Speaker A: Right now. He's okay. [00:48:32] Speaker B: And we force them up and we do something. We hang him. He's struggling. We get the. Out of there. [00:48:35] Speaker A: It's. It's. [00:48:39] Speaker C: That was like 20 seconds. [00:48:41] Speaker A: Yeah, I think it's possible. I think it's very possible. I think it's. You know, and it's probably not one guy either. It's probably like. [00:48:49] Speaker B: I bet it was like two guys. [00:48:50] Speaker A: Yeah, it's got to be. [00:48:51] Speaker D: All right. [00:48:52] Speaker A: It's. I don't know. I don't know. I mean, look, we'll never know. [00:48:55] Speaker B: Okay? So we have to acknowledge what they said. They said that. And it seems like a really flimsy excuse to me, but they said that the. The camera resets every night at midnight. So the missing gap is like between 11:58 and midnight. And they're like, every day is missing that bit. And then they were like. They were like, we'll release the other days just to prove it. I don't know if they did or not. [00:49:17] Speaker D: Okay. Do you think there is no list, though? [00:49:19] Speaker A: There's a list. [00:49:20] Speaker B: There's a list. Trump's on the list. That's why it's not coming out. [00:49:22] Speaker D: Yeah, yeah. Okay. We all agree with that. [00:49:23] Speaker B: Yeah, Yeah. [00:49:25] Speaker A: I mean, why wouldn't he be? Everybody was there fucking pictures of them together. Everyone. This guy was. Even if you're not a child molester, this guy was a person of stature, you understand? Like, he. If they didn't go to the island, they went to his house. This guy was somebody. [00:49:38] Speaker B: And for what reason also. [00:49:40] Speaker A: Yeah, the way he just. [00:49:41] Speaker B: Super rich dude. [00:49:42] Speaker A: And the way he got rich was Ponzi schemes. No, I think that was made off. [00:49:46] Speaker B: No, he did something like. [00:49:47] Speaker A: No. Yeah, yeah. He got money from the Victoria's Secret guy. Leslie Wexler. [00:49:51] Speaker D: That's right. [00:49:51] Speaker B: That was later. But he met. He got his start in Wall Street. Jeffrey Epstein managing a pond Ponzi scheme. [00:49:56] Speaker A: Dude, it. The whole thing is just insane. [00:49:58] Speaker D: Apparently he. A lot of people are theorizing that he was like a spy for. For Israel. [00:50:04] Speaker A: I've heard that he was a spy for Israel. [00:50:05] Speaker D: Yeah. [00:50:06] Speaker A: Really? [00:50:06] Speaker D: Yeah, I've heard That theory. [00:50:08] Speaker B: I didn't. Not for Israel specifically, but I've heard that he was like, a foreign agent. [00:50:12] Speaker A: Anyways, either way. Have you ever passed by his house? [00:50:15] Speaker D: No. [00:50:16] Speaker A: On the Upper east side. [00:50:17] Speaker B: I don't know which one it is. [00:50:18] Speaker A: Oh, I know which one it is. Show me something still smells of baby. No, it's. I've passed by the house. It's insane. [00:50:26] Speaker B: Yeah, it is. [00:50:27] Speaker A: So dope. Gigantic. It's a fucking apartment building. [00:50:31] Speaker D: Wow. [00:50:31] Speaker C: Do you think that the. [00:50:32] Speaker A: The. [00:50:32] Speaker C: The prices, like, quadrupled since. [00:50:35] Speaker A: No, I probably fucking tanked. [00:50:37] Speaker C: Think so? [00:50:37] Speaker A: I don't think anyone wants to live in a house where kids were getting fucked. [00:50:39] Speaker D: What happened to his assets? He didn't have children. [00:50:43] Speaker C: Times are tough. [00:50:45] Speaker B: I don't know what happened to his assets. [00:50:46] Speaker A: That's a good. [00:50:46] Speaker B: Well, I think they were probably all seized by the government. Government. [00:50:49] Speaker A: This is just one of those things where it's like another thing. Like, the government can make you look like. And go like, oh. Every day there's a minute missing from this video. It's like, we don't. What do you think we're so stupid. You think we. You can't do this. Everyone. Yeah. There's nothing we can do about it. [00:51:01] Speaker B: But they were too stupid to, like, you know, remove a time stamp. [00:51:05] Speaker A: They don't even need to. But they don't even need to be that careful because no one will ever know. [00:51:08] Speaker D: Yeah. [00:51:09] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:51:09] Speaker A: We could be so flimsy about the reality. [00:51:12] Speaker B: The government sucks at covering up conspiracy conspiracies, dude. I mean, yeah, jfk, they've always been really shitty at it. [00:51:18] Speaker D: Did they end up releasing the JFK files? [00:51:20] Speaker A: No. [00:51:20] Speaker B: Nope. [00:51:21] Speaker C: That was a hoax. [00:51:22] Speaker A: No, he said he was going to. I think there was some files. Yeah. [00:51:25] Speaker C: Something. [00:51:25] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah. Some was released, but I don't think. [00:51:27] Speaker B: All it was redacted. Everything important was redacted. [00:51:29] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:51:30] Speaker B: So there's like. We didn't learn anything new. [00:51:31] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:51:31] Speaker D: But even still, this has been sitting in a file for what, 40, 50 years? How much could. How much could that have just been with this whole time? Even. You don't know. [00:51:40] Speaker A: Even if point. It's like, you can release the files. You can release everything. And it's like, we don't know what. [00:51:44] Speaker D: Actually is it to make a fake file and give you that and. [00:51:46] Speaker A: Exactly. [00:51:47] Speaker D: Yeah. [00:51:48] Speaker A: So that's the thing, dude. I mean, the JFK one is the most insane. You ever watch the Godfather Part two? [00:51:53] Speaker D: No. [00:51:54] Speaker A: Oh, dude. It's all. It's basically about how the mob got together to get, like, the JFK got in because of the mob. That's how he ended up president. And then he fucked them and went after them. Because his brother was. His brother was like the district attorney. [00:52:09] Speaker B: Yeah. What was his name? Rfk. Was that rfk? The original? [00:52:12] Speaker A: Yeah, the R. Yeah, the OG Bobby Kennedy. And then they eventually killed. That's like. It was CIA mob. It was so tied up. But like the fact that the mob was able to get a guy in to be like this guy, we're gonna get him elected as president. It's just. It's so insane, dude. I'm obsessed with it. I love the jersey. [00:52:29] Speaker D: I love the whole mafia past you guys have especially. It's so cool, dude. [00:52:34] Speaker B: That's pretty cool. [00:52:35] Speaker D: Yeah. Cartels are not nearly as cool as a mar. [00:52:37] Speaker A: It's not as interesting. Cartels are pretty sick because they like you're dealing with a country that has is mayhem going on anyway. To be able to operate criminally in a country that's like civilized and get away with it, that is insane. [00:52:48] Speaker C: Well, yeah. Cartels are a lot more ruthless. Like the Mafia. I feel like they had rules, you. [00:52:53] Speaker A: Know, they don't kill wicked children. [00:52:55] Speaker C: Principles. If they did, it was like they. [00:52:59] Speaker B: Were going to mafia. They're all like legit business. You wouldn't shoot them. [00:53:02] Speaker A: Yeah. You take care of their family after that. Yeah. There was, There was. You know, who doesn't have any. There's so like now it's not the Sicilian Mafia. That's like the, the, the. The top dog. It's the Calabrian Mafia. And they are so inter Calabria in Italy. [00:53:18] Speaker B: Like, that's a different Italy. [00:53:19] Speaker A: Calabrese. Yeah, it's. It's also trash Guineas. Yeah. Basically. That's what my family's from. Yeah. And they are ruthless. Like they will murder everybody. [00:53:29] Speaker B: You got to be to compete. That's what I think in the modern world, dude. [00:53:31] Speaker A: Right. [00:53:32] Speaker B: These. The cartels have stepped up the game. [00:53:34] Speaker A: That's. Dude, I. I don't even know if I should talk about it, but my mother has a friend whose brother was the connection between Colombia and Sicily. He was the top dog of trafficking cocaine and he just got out of prison. The dude and his. My mom's friend free the boy. My mom's friend, she had to go to jail too do. Like there was a ton of. Dude. If there's a book, he wrote a book while he was in jail. This guy doesn't speak English, but he was the direct connection Pablo Escobar to Sicily. Like the. This giant drug trade. [00:54:08] Speaker B: That's pretty Cool. [00:54:09] Speaker A: It's the coolest. [00:54:10] Speaker D: How long did he go away for? [00:54:11] Speaker A: Oh like 50 years, dude. He's an old man now. He's living in like Florida with like a pizza shop or some. It's a crazy. [00:54:18] Speaker D: These guys put money away for a rainy day. Like jerk. And they go out and. [00:54:21] Speaker C: Yeah, they have, they have. I feel like they have contingency plan. [00:54:24] Speaker D: That would have to. [00:54:25] Speaker A: You have to. I mean, Frank Lucas, you watch American Gangster. [00:54:27] Speaker D: Yeah. [00:54:27] Speaker A: Like they all like have money put away. It's. [00:54:29] Speaker B: If it doesn't start being in a mafia. And maybe this is just like the Jew in me, but if I were in a mafia, I would make them pay into like a fund so we could pay for each other's like legal department, you know what I mean? [00:54:40] Speaker A: Well, you know. [00:54:40] Speaker B: Do you know the legal defense fund? [00:54:42] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:54:42] Speaker B: And if one of us gets busted, we'll fucking. [00:54:44] Speaker A: That. [00:54:44] Speaker C: That's not Jewish. That's very commie of you. [00:54:46] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:54:47] Speaker D: So did Frank Lucas put money away? [00:54:50] Speaker A: I think he did, but I think it may have gotten seized. That's the other thing. If you have cat, it's all got to be cash. [00:54:53] Speaker D: Yeah. [00:54:53] Speaker A: Even if you put it away, it's the government I guess finds it. [00:54:56] Speaker C: Well, there's that. There's that scene in American Gangster where Prank castles I or whatever. Frank Lucas, he's like, I'll never, I'll never rat. [00:55:04] Speaker A: I'll never rat. [00:55:05] Speaker C: And then they do something. They like tell him something. I forget what it was like, either they seized his money or they're like, you're going away for life or whatever. And then he immediately is like, the next scene is just a cut to him like putting pictures on a whiteboard. And yeah. [00:55:19] Speaker A: He was a crazy. [00:55:20] Speaker B: I feel like the cartels in Mexico are just like what would have happened if the wild west never stopped, you. [00:55:25] Speaker A: Know, that's, that's a good point. Yeah, I like that. But would they be as successful if they didn't bring drugs into this country? Because they're. We're our biggest. [00:55:31] Speaker B: We got the money. [00:55:32] Speaker A: Yeah. So if we didn't exist, the cartel wouldn't be as powerful as it is. [00:55:37] Speaker D: They're not making money off selling drugs in Mexico. [00:55:39] Speaker A: No, no one's into drug. They want the white kids in America. [00:55:42] Speaker B: The Mexicans are good, hard working people. [00:55:44] Speaker D: Yeah, they are. [00:55:46] Speaker B: Yeah. I'm not making a joke at all. I just don't. [00:55:51] Speaker A: Our white asses, they build those tunnels to get the drugs in. Yeah, yeah. [00:55:56] Speaker B: They're hardworking people. [00:55:57] Speaker D: Buy cocaine in Mexico. It's like, $10. [00:55:59] Speaker A: It's so cocaine in Costa Rica. I. So I got off the plane. I was there for a bachelor party. I get off the plane, and this dude goes, ah, cocaina. Who wants coca? And I was like, oh, right here. And we get on a bus to go to, like, we. We rented out this spot, like, this place, and we get on a bus, and, dude, I'm not kidding you. We were on the top of a mountain, and I'm like, where the are we? There was a bodega, like, a deli on this mountain, and a guy gets on the bus, and he just whips out a pile of cocaine. And we bought 35 grams of fresh Costa Rican cocaine. And it was, like, $400. It was so cheap. It's. [00:56:42] Speaker C: Was it in a brick? [00:56:44] Speaker A: No, it wasn't in a brick, but I tasted it, and my whole face, I was like, whatever this guy's got, I'm like, we're taking it. [00:56:51] Speaker C: See that? That's. I. I like. I try not to do blow, but if I was in. If I was in Mexico and somebody came out with, like, the purest cocaine I've ever seen, I'd be like, yeah, you cannot. [00:57:03] Speaker A: Right? It's like going to Italy and not having the best red wine. Like. [00:57:06] Speaker C: Yeah, it's like fine cheese. [00:57:08] Speaker A: Exactly. You got to have it. [00:57:09] Speaker B: Get it from. That's farm. The table coat. That's what that is. [00:57:12] Speaker A: So you're sober, Cam. Let's say you were in Colombia right now, right? You're sober, and you saw a brick, like, of the purest cocaine. You're telling me right now you wouldn't do a little 100%? [00:57:21] Speaker D: I would try. [00:57:21] Speaker A: Yeah. You have to. [00:57:22] Speaker D: I've done so much of it. [00:57:24] Speaker A: No, but I mean, right now. [00:57:25] Speaker D: Yeah, of course. [00:57:25] Speaker A: Okay. Yeah, yeah. [00:57:26] Speaker D: Like, yeah, I'm way too curious to. [00:57:28] Speaker A: You have to. [00:57:29] Speaker D: Yeah, you got it. [00:57:30] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:57:31] Speaker D: Yeah. [00:57:31] Speaker B: The new thing on my Instagram feed is, like, just people making cocaine in Colombia. [00:57:36] Speaker A: You have the most. [00:57:38] Speaker C: It's crazy. It's crazy. I try not to open the memes you send because I don't want my algorithm them to get. [00:57:43] Speaker A: No. [00:57:43] Speaker B: Join me. It's fun. I'm getting a lot of. Like, I'm getting. They make, like, tourism videos for Colombia. They're like, you know, they're. They're made by the cartel or whatever, but it's just, like, people, like, grinding up leaves, and they're like, come to Colombia. [00:57:54] Speaker D: You can do cocaine tours where you go and make the cocaine for a day. Oh, what? [00:58:00] Speaker C: That's. [00:58:01] Speaker A: Dope dude, are we going on a trip? [00:58:03] Speaker C: Yeah, there's a whole, there's fun for the whole family. [00:58:06] Speaker D: Tourism. [00:58:07] Speaker B: What is that? [00:58:07] Speaker D: Like when the, you go out, you, you, you crush the leaves up, you refine it. They give you two bags at the end of the day. Two grams. [00:58:14] Speaker A: Oh, my God. [00:58:15] Speaker D: Yeah, there's like. [00:58:16] Speaker A: It's like medieval times. [00:58:17] Speaker B: Dude, that's so cool. [00:58:18] Speaker C: They give you, they give you a little to go bag. [00:58:20] Speaker D: Yeah, you get two of them. [00:58:21] Speaker B: Like, what's the thing where people used to like, drop out of college and go to New Zealand to work on a farm? [00:58:24] Speaker A: Oh, the Peace Corps. [00:58:26] Speaker B: That's not Peace Corps. [00:58:27] Speaker A: There's another thing. I know what you're talking, but it's. [00:58:29] Speaker B: Like that for coke. [00:58:30] Speaker D: It's great. [00:58:30] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:58:30] Speaker B: Yeah, I love that. [00:58:31] Speaker A: I'd love to work on a coke farm. [00:58:32] Speaker D: I would love to. [00:58:33] Speaker A: I would love to see how it's made. [00:58:34] Speaker D: I often wonder why we don't make like, make our own cocaine in these countries. Like, why isn't there, why isn't there farms growing their own coca leaves? [00:58:44] Speaker B: We can't grow the cocoa leaf. [00:58:45] Speaker D: Surely we can figure out now how to grow the coca leaves. [00:58:48] Speaker B: Or we could repurpose some of the abandoned buildings in New York City. Vertical farming. Cocoa leaves. [00:58:54] Speaker A: Why? [00:58:54] Speaker D: Okay, that's another question. I, I've often thought about vertical farming. Why haven't we done vertical farming? [00:58:59] Speaker B: We should be doing vertical farming. [00:59:00] Speaker D: Like, why isn't there city towers that do vertical farming? [00:59:02] Speaker B: That's a great question. [00:59:05] Speaker A: I'm fucking high as shit. Yeah, the mushrooms hit. [00:59:10] Speaker B: Look at us talking about liberal. [00:59:11] Speaker D: You know, I think it makes. Makes sense. [00:59:13] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:59:13] Speaker D: No, we should be like, you're not, you're not traveling far with the, with the produce. [00:59:17] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:59:18] Speaker A: I got a question. [00:59:19] Speaker B: Cheaper. [00:59:19] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:59:19] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:59:20] Speaker A: You guys believe. I had a conversation with someone recently about this. Do you guys think the farmers market, like, when you go there, you don't think they're just buying strawberries from the supermarket and just like repackaging them? [00:59:29] Speaker B: What a great question. [00:59:30] Speaker C: I do see a lot of Driscolls out. [00:59:31] Speaker A: Yeah. I'm like, yo, like, where'd you get this? Like, I, the person I was talking to looked at the person like, where did these eggs come from? And they were like. And it was. They couldn't really get answer. [00:59:41] Speaker B: I'll tell you what, I don't know if that's true, but I'm like to believe it from now on and I'm going to tell other people. [00:59:45] Speaker A: Well, I don't believe. Oh, it's like they said Michigan or something, and I'm like. I'm like, wait, what the. You can't get eggs closer. Like, what's going on here? I don't know. In Michigan, the fruits are good, but. [00:59:54] Speaker D: Yeah, I don't know. Do you guys ever get the fruit from the, like, the guys on the side of the road, the little Mexican dudes? [01:00:00] Speaker A: No, they suck. They buy those from store. [01:00:02] Speaker D: It's cheap. [01:00:03] Speaker A: It's cheap, but it's not ripe half the time. [01:00:05] Speaker D: Well, I find it goes off in two days. You got to, like. You got to deal with it in, like, a day or two. Otherwise, it's gone. But it's. It's cheap. [01:00:11] Speaker B: Can I grab a water? [01:00:12] Speaker A: Yeah, do your thing. You just got to grab a cup. [01:00:14] Speaker B: Yeah. [01:00:15] Speaker A: What time is it? How long we've been going? [01:00:17] Speaker C: It is 105. [01:00:19] Speaker A: Oh, sick. Only an hour. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know, dude. Just those farmers markets, like, they're. Prices are jacked up. [01:00:27] Speaker D: I think that they can be cheaper, but it's cheaper than the supermarkets. [01:00:32] Speaker A: You think so? [01:00:32] Speaker D: I do, yeah. [01:00:33] Speaker A: But do you think they're also getting it from a farm? [01:00:35] Speaker D: I think they're getting it all from the same. The same place. So how. How fruit normally works? It normally goes to, like, a market. A big market. [01:00:41] Speaker A: Yes. [01:00:42] Speaker D: Where all this. All the suppliers come in and buy from. So all the shopping centers would have buyers. Yeah, all the farmers markets that have buyers, they buy from the same place. They package it, they take it with themselves, and then they resell it. Okay, so it's. It's all coming from the same place. It's just what's in season? [01:00:56] Speaker A: Oh, my God. [01:00:57] Speaker D: Yeah. [01:00:58] Speaker B: It's almost heirloom tomato season, dude. [01:01:00] Speaker A: Tomato season in Jersey. Eat the best tomatoes. You ever had a Jersey tomato. Oh, on the side of a road, like a farm stand. [01:01:06] Speaker C: I want to get. You know what I want to get? I want to get, like, a mason jar of, like, homemade tomato sauce. [01:01:11] Speaker A: Oh, dude, you. Can. I make. I've made my own tomato sauce. I got cans. [01:01:14] Speaker C: Yeah, like, from tomatoes? [01:01:16] Speaker A: Yeah, real, dude. It's. It's. [01:01:19] Speaker D: Can you guys say tomato? [01:01:21] Speaker A: Tomato. [01:01:22] Speaker C: Tomato. Tomato. [01:01:23] Speaker D: There we go. [01:01:23] Speaker B: Do you say tomato? [01:01:26] Speaker C: Well, this is America, Cam. [01:01:27] Speaker A: Okay? Start assimilating adjusted. Before we call ice society. [01:01:33] Speaker B: Can you guys say I make tomato sauce? I think we should have a tomato sauce off, dude. [01:01:36] Speaker A: I've been wanting to, like, have a really good red sauce pasta. We should do that together. Yeah. Yeah. [01:01:41] Speaker C: I'm a pretty decent cook. [01:01:42] Speaker A: Yeah, I could do chicken parm. That's about It. [01:01:45] Speaker C: That's pretty good. [01:01:46] Speaker A: Yeah. And eggs. Yeah. Right? You're gonna throw up once you go. [01:01:50] Speaker D: It's not just burping. [01:01:51] Speaker A: We should have had another shot. [01:01:52] Speaker C: I love to cook pasta. [01:01:54] Speaker A: Should we know to do another shot to kill? [01:01:57] Speaker C: I could do it. Dude, I am vibrating right now. [01:01:59] Speaker A: I'm super fucked up. Yeah, yeah, yeah. [01:02:02] Speaker C: I like to. I like to cook pasta. I like to cook. [01:02:05] Speaker A: How do you like it? Al dente. Well, hard, right? [01:02:07] Speaker C: No, no. Al dente. [01:02:09] Speaker A: Yeah, it's hard. That's like. It's why it's like, not super soft, but, like, it's almost like a bit. [01:02:12] Speaker C: Of a. I always fuck it up. I find a way to fuck it up. But. Yeah, because you gotta, like. You gotta. What? I. What I didn't realize for the longest time is, like, when you bring water to a boil and then you put the pasta in, you turn the watt. You turn the heat down a little bit. [01:02:25] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:02:25] Speaker C: So that way you're not pressed for time and. Yeah, but. [01:02:29] Speaker D: Gotta salt the water as well. [01:02:30] Speaker C: Yeah, you got salt, olive oil. [01:02:32] Speaker B: Gotta use the pasta water sauce. [01:02:34] Speaker A: Yes, you do. You need to. Otherwise it sticks together. [01:02:36] Speaker C: Yeah, well. And that. It helps the sauce hold on to the. The noodles. Hold onto the sauce. [01:02:42] Speaker A: That's what precum is. Pasta water. Yes. [01:02:45] Speaker B: Is that like, to describe the consistency and viscosity of it? [01:02:48] Speaker A: No, it's still a little creamier than pasta water, but pasta water, that's what I was. [01:02:55] Speaker C: Ever seen pre. [01:02:56] Speaker B: I don't think it exists. I don't think it's real. [01:02:58] Speaker C: Dude, a little too much salt in here, dude. [01:03:01] Speaker A: That's just. [01:03:01] Speaker C: Also, why does your pasta taste like cigarettes, dude? [01:03:06] Speaker A: You guys, I'm feeling very sentimental right now. Yeah. [01:03:11] Speaker B: Yeah. [01:03:11] Speaker A: Well, you want to talk about love? Maybe you want to talk about love. What about you, Joe? How much? Dude, I'm up right now. [01:03:22] Speaker C: Dude, I. I just clenched my jaw and I felt every single muscle in my mout. [01:03:28] Speaker A: We didn't even have that many mushrooms. No. I think we need to get Eli more fucked up. Should we have a shot of tequila? [01:03:32] Speaker C: I'll just do a shot of tequila. [01:03:33] Speaker A: All right. Just one person. Want to grab it and just like. I'll grab a glass. [01:03:35] Speaker B: I was gonna say. Do we take a sponsor break? [01:03:37] Speaker C: Yeah, yeah, we can do a sponsor break. Thank you. [01:03:39] Speaker B: Kids, let's. We don't have any sponsors, do we? [01:03:42] Speaker A: No, not yet. The reposado. Yeah, those three cups. Yeah, just. Just a shot each. Not. [01:03:50] Speaker B: Not. [01:03:50] Speaker A: Don't go too crazy. You look like you're a bartender in Florida. [01:03:54] Speaker B: But you could be a bartender. [01:03:55] Speaker A: You're only there hiding out because ye for trafficking coke. Dude, you. You. I feel like you have the kind of life cam that's like a Johnny Depp and blow. Like, you know, like, where he's just like. You've had a wild life Cam. [01:04:09] Speaker C: I don't want you to take offense to this, but you look like if you got invited to Epstein's island, you would go just. Just for. Just to check it out. [01:04:17] Speaker A: I hate to say it. I would love to see it. [01:04:20] Speaker B: I went to the island just because you thought it was gonna be a nice island time. [01:04:22] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:04:23] Speaker B: And you had, like, no idea. Yeah. You're just like flip flops and bathing suits. I'm gonna relax, get a tan. [01:04:28] Speaker A: Wait a second. [01:04:29] Speaker B: What are all these young girls doing? [01:04:31] Speaker A: They're all drugged out and don't know where they are. Like, what's going on right now. [01:04:35] Speaker C: Would you guys go to woodstock99 knowing everything you know about us? Would you if you could go 100% Woodstock 99? [01:04:44] Speaker A: Yeah. What people? [01:04:45] Speaker C: Not a tragedy. No, no. It's just, like, so well maintained. Or like, it was so poorly maintained. [01:04:50] Speaker B: During Limp Bizkit set. I would have not stayed for Limp Bizkit. [01:04:53] Speaker C: Oh, I would have not been in the fucking pit. [01:04:55] Speaker A: I would have been. [01:04:56] Speaker C: I would have broke stuff. [01:04:57] Speaker A: Dude, Cam did not give us a shot. This is way more than a shot. [01:05:00] Speaker B: Yeah. [01:05:00] Speaker A: Oh, my God. [01:05:02] Speaker C: Cheers. [01:05:02] Speaker A: So Limp Bizkit, you'd be there for. [01:05:05] Speaker B: Well, Limp Bizkit was the one that went wrong. [01:05:08] Speaker A: What was it, Roland? Jesus. [01:05:10] Speaker C: No, it's break stuff. [01:05:11] Speaker B: It was break stuff. They did break stuff, but the audience went nuts. And, like, some women got raped and. Yeah, there's a documentary. You can watch it. [01:05:17] Speaker C: I don't think it was during Limp Bizkit set, though. It was. It was at night during the raves women were getting. [01:05:22] Speaker D: You're right. [01:05:22] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:05:23] Speaker B: Yeah. [01:05:23] Speaker C: And you know what? [01:05:23] Speaker D: The. [01:05:24] Speaker C: It's fucked up. But, like, there's this one part in the. The Netflix documentary where the guy that was running would stalk 99. He goes to. To justify how's the camera. The, like, the fucking rape. He was like, there was a hundred thousand people there over three days. I mean, like, in a village with 100,000 people, three rapes isn't that bad. [01:05:47] Speaker A: Who was doing this interview? Your father? [01:05:49] Speaker C: Larry David? [01:05:51] Speaker D: Sorry, I wouldn't go to it. [01:05:52] Speaker B: I would have been at Woodside. It. I'm disgusting, dude. I'm a dirty. [01:05:54] Speaker A: I mean, knowing what I know, I don't want to be associated with people getting raped, honestly. [01:05:58] Speaker B: Well, I mean, to, you know, this guy's point, you probably wouldn't be. You'd be just as surprised if there's. [01:06:02] Speaker A: A hundred thousand people. I maybe wouldn't even know that someone was. [01:06:04] Speaker B: You wouldn't even know it. [01:06:05] Speaker C: I wouldn't know. Yeah, yeah. I mean, think of all the times that you've been to, like, Brooklyn Mirage or, you know, any. Any given festival, and you're like, somebody's getting fingered in the bathroom. They don't want it. [01:06:15] Speaker B: I think the problems at Woodstock 99 that affected it. [01:06:18] Speaker C: Didn't want it or didn't know if someone's getting. [01:06:22] Speaker B: Harrison has trouble with this contest. [01:06:24] Speaker A: I need to. I need to make phone calls and apologize. [01:06:29] Speaker B: The problems that affected everyone at woodstock 99 were the bathroom overflows. [01:06:33] Speaker A: That was gross. [01:06:33] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah. So that would have affected everybody. [01:06:35] Speaker C: Okay, well, there was. There was. There was poop in the water. In the drinking water? [01:06:39] Speaker B: Yeah, there was poop in the drinking water. Yes. [01:06:41] Speaker C: So this was very gross. Right? Like, there were. There was. Were people. Everyone stock 99 that were going home with, like, lesions on them. [01:06:50] Speaker D: But they. But they weren't. Then they didn't even have enough water for the people to buy. And then they were jacking up the price, selling bottles of water for, like, 15 in 1999. [01:07:00] Speaker C: Where was on Donnie about that? [01:07:04] Speaker B: Dude, water's expensive at a festival. [01:07:06] Speaker A: Dude. Any festival water's expensive. Dude, water's expensive. From the deli now it's $4. [01:07:09] Speaker B: Yeah, I can see how that was a big deal in the 90s, but life is more now. [01:07:12] Speaker A: Now it's like, if you told me $20 for a bottle of water and I'm high on ecstasy, I will pay 40. [01:07:16] Speaker C: It really is like, have you seen. [01:07:18] Speaker A: Spaceballs when I was really young? [01:07:21] Speaker C: Okay. You know how they. They, like, bottle air. [01:07:23] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:07:24] Speaker C: Oxygen. [01:07:25] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:07:25] Speaker C: That's what bottled water is. It's like, we all need it. And they're like, why don't we sell this? [01:07:29] Speaker B: Dude, Older people remember a time before bottled water? [01:07:31] Speaker A: My dad, you know, you want to hear the. The most old school shit? When my dad's. When we sold the house because we went broken, he goes, we. He had a massive water bill that he never paid he. For. For the entire time I was living there, the 23 years, he goes, I not paying the water because I refuse because I didn't have to pay for water growing up. Water. And then when we sold the house, he had a massive water bill that he never paid. He just refused. Like, I'M not doing it. [01:07:55] Speaker B: So he never paid it. [01:07:56] Speaker A: I think he had to at some point because he, you know. You know. But when growing up, he's like, nope, I don't pay that bill. [01:08:01] Speaker D: We should not have to pay for water and we shouldn't have to pay for electricity. Electricity, Electricity, energy, water. It's. [01:08:07] Speaker A: Yeah, but getting electricity together to, like, where we need it, it takes work. [01:08:11] Speaker D: Come out of taxes. It shouldn't come out of you, I guess. [01:08:13] Speaker A: Taxes. Yeah. [01:08:14] Speaker D: I'm a. I think a little bit of socialism in society should be. Is a good thing. [01:08:18] Speaker B: Go back to your. [01:08:19] Speaker A: Out of my house. [01:08:23] Speaker C: Get that out of here. [01:08:25] Speaker D: You know, Cuba, it's a socialist country. Yeah. [01:08:27] Speaker A: They're delirious. [01:08:28] Speaker C: Doing great. [01:08:28] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:08:29] Speaker C: You know, they have a clean bill of health. Historically, one of the best. [01:08:34] Speaker D: Didn't bloody put all your tariffs and embargoes on them. Yeah, we kind of did that. But do you know. Do you know Cuba per capita has the highest number of doctors out of any country in the world? [01:08:44] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:08:45] Speaker C: Because anybody can be a doctor. [01:08:48] Speaker D: I guess a vet is classified as a human doctor. [01:08:50] Speaker A: I still think this 1950s Chevy Bel Air is a good car, bro. [01:08:53] Speaker D: I didn't have any choice. I couldn't import anything else. [01:08:55] Speaker A: Whatever. [01:08:56] Speaker C: I had a buddy that went to Cuba and he was like, dude, it's so communist here. And I'm like, what do you mean? He's like, like all. Like everything. It's a shanty town. And then all of the nice buildings are government owned. Like, that is. [01:09:08] Speaker A: It's not good. [01:09:09] Speaker C: Yeah. I don't like that. I like it. [01:09:12] Speaker D: Yeah. [01:09:13] Speaker B: Are we. Are we allowed to go to Cuba right now? [01:09:15] Speaker A: Yeah, I think so. I think we're allowed to fly that. Who. Who did that? Was it Barack? [01:09:19] Speaker B: Yeah, Barack. [01:09:19] Speaker A: I think it was a normalized relationship. [01:09:21] Speaker B: But I thought Trump was going to bring it back to the no go. Yeah. [01:09:25] Speaker A: I don't know. I have no. I. I want to see it, but I'm like, I'm not, like, rushing to go there. [01:09:28] Speaker B: I would totally go to Cuba. [01:09:29] Speaker D: I've heard it's been too. I've heard it's a bit of a shithole. [01:09:31] Speaker A: Yeah. I mean, yeah, for people that have. [01:09:33] Speaker D: Traveled, like, there's some nice places. But Sonia went there recently. She said it was, like, really lovely some places, but other places are not. [01:09:39] Speaker C: Yeah. [01:09:39] Speaker B: It's a communist country, just like every other country did. [01:09:41] Speaker D: Yeah, that's like Central and South America in a nutshell. [01:09:44] Speaker A: Yeah, but you're not gonna see a shit. I mean, the Bronx maybe Was a shanty town years ago. [01:09:47] Speaker B: You ever go to the middle. You ever go to the middle of this country? [01:09:50] Speaker A: Yeah, I've been to Oklahoma. I really liked it. [01:09:52] Speaker B: Oklahoma. [01:09:53] Speaker A: Tulsa was great. [01:09:53] Speaker B: What about, like, Appalachia or something? We got some shanty towns. [01:09:57] Speaker A: I'm scared as a Jew. Like, there's certain places like that. People don't understand this. Okay. I'm white, straight guy, and you can't tell that I'm Jewish. But there are certain places where I go and I am. I'm genuinely like, if they find out I'm Jewish, they'll fucking kill me. [01:10:09] Speaker D: Really? [01:10:10] Speaker A: Dude. In Tulsa, a guy delivered my coffee. He had a swastika tattooed on the back of his skull. Nicest guy ever gave me the coffee, turned around, and I went, oh, my God. I said, I. I don't belong here like this. [01:10:22] Speaker B: Well, again, this is why I. I struggle with the. The rise in anti Semitism narrative, because as a Jew in the United States, you always have the option to just not be Jewish. If you don't. [01:10:32] Speaker A: Yeah, you could. [01:10:32] Speaker B: You could just turn it off. You can just be like, nah. [01:10:34] Speaker A: Yeah. I mean, I lie all the time. Yeah. As to the. The Jews who asked me if I'm Jewish just because I don't want to. [01:10:40] Speaker D: Pray on the subway in World War II, would the. Did the Jews ever just lie that they. And just say they were not Jews? [01:10:45] Speaker B: They would. [01:10:46] Speaker A: They would pull their pants down a lot of the time and see if they were snipped. That was nice. Yeah. They would see, Germans are unsnipped. It was common. [01:10:54] Speaker C: They would, like, take the measurements of their skull. Their fucking lot of shit. [01:10:58] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:10:58] Speaker B: Yeah. You can't lie to a German. [01:10:59] Speaker A: The thing is, they're going to figure it out, Cam. At the time, but it wasn't like they just were like, all right, concentration camps. It started out with, like, all right, we're gonna all put you in one section in one neighborhood. You guys cool with that? And it was like, all right, I guess we'll do that. The government's telling us to go. It's like, we're all Jewish. Like, there's no reason to lie. They're not gonna kill us. And then they're in a ghetto. And then they go from the ghetto, and they're like, they're going to. At that point, everyone knows you're Jewish because you're in the ghetto. All right, we have you all in one place. You can't lie anymore. And now we'll ship you off to a concentration camp three years later. That was the thing. It didn't happen that rapidly. Like, where we. Like, why. Why would we need to lie? They just want to put us over here. [01:11:33] Speaker B: It took a couple years, though. [01:11:34] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:11:34] Speaker B: Like Gaza, Like Gaza. [01:11:36] Speaker A: Like the Mexicans don't do this. I hate mushrooms. I don't want to talk about Gaza. We need to just turn it into. [01:11:45] Speaker D: A casino and put a few Trump towels in there. [01:11:48] Speaker B: What did he call it? The. What was the. He used the expression of like the something. The Riviera of the funny. [01:11:55] Speaker A: What a great way to market, dude. [01:11:57] Speaker B: Jeez. [01:11:57] Speaker A: Jesus Christ. A king at that. [01:11:58] Speaker D: I mean, that's some beautiful waterfront. [01:12:00] Speaker B: Yeah. [01:12:00] Speaker A: Oh, in Israel, dude. It's great. [01:12:02] Speaker D: Yeah. [01:12:02] Speaker A: I've never been. [01:12:03] Speaker B: I've never been. You never did birthright? [01:12:05] Speaker A: No, I missed the boat. [01:12:06] Speaker B: Yeah. [01:12:06] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:12:08] Speaker B: I think we're too. [01:12:09] Speaker A: We probably could. [01:12:09] Speaker B: Well, the thing is, I think this might be the last year we're the same age. [01:12:12] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:12:13] Speaker C: I don't know if right now this. [01:12:14] Speaker B: Is the last year we can do it, but, like, we're gonna be the old guys. [01:12:18] Speaker A: That'll be dope. [01:12:19] Speaker D: Apparently it's gonna be that dope. [01:12:23] Speaker B: And they're all gonna be. And we're gonna be like the dad. [01:12:26] Speaker A: I gotta go lay down. [01:12:28] Speaker B: I don't think it's gonna be cool, dude. [01:12:29] Speaker D: Yeah, that's true. [01:12:30] Speaker A: What cowards. What happened? [01:12:33] Speaker C: He was saying that the, like the number of people on birthright has dropped significantly. And I'm like, yeah, cuz. Cuz everything that's going on there right. [01:12:40] Speaker B: Now, that wasn't even part of it. [01:12:41] Speaker A: Maybe the safest time to go. Honestly, probably a lot of times Israel, they say, like, when there's a war going on, it's. They say it's like the safest time because it's like, yo. They. They just. I mean, they also have the Iron Dome and they just go, like, we're already ready. [01:12:53] Speaker B: Like, we go over there, watch the fireworks show. Yeah, check it out, bro. [01:12:57] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:12:59] Speaker C: I did see a video of Caitlyn Jenner in a bunker in Israel. [01:13:03] Speaker B: Being like, we sent Caitlyn Jenner. [01:13:05] Speaker C: She was over there hanging out. And then she was in a bunker while. While Iran was sending bombs and missiles. [01:13:11] Speaker B: She was on the Israel side. [01:13:12] Speaker A: Yeah, she's big. [01:13:13] Speaker C: She was in Israel. I don't think she would do well in Iran. [01:13:16] Speaker D: Do you reckon? Do you reckon it's kind of exciting? Reckon it's kind of exciting because. [01:13:21] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:13:21] Speaker D: Let me put into context. My grandmother lived through World War II in England when they were getting bombed. [01:13:25] Speaker A: By the Germans and I. [01:13:27] Speaker D: And I asked her heaps of times. I was like, what was it like? You know, was it. Was it scary? And she said it was the most exciting time to be alive. [01:13:34] Speaker B: That's cool. [01:13:34] Speaker C: Dude, women are crazy. [01:13:37] Speaker D: World War II, I love this. Everyone lives like, it was last day to be alive. [01:13:42] Speaker A: Well, there's a beauty in that. There's a real beauty in knowing, like, yo, we may die today. We really better fucking enjoy it. [01:13:46] Speaker C: Yeah, yeah, but. But women back then also had the freedom of not having to go to war. [01:13:51] Speaker B: That's true. [01:13:51] Speaker C: Like, the guys, like, as a. If you. [01:13:54] Speaker A: It was the best. Men just did everything. I didn't have to do a fucking thing. [01:13:59] Speaker C: Like, if you were. If you were in the ages of like, 18 to 25, in the early 1940s, dude, it was probably so fucking scary because every day you're thinking, like, I'm going to get plucked. Yeah, I'm going to have to go fight. I'm going to have to go storm the beaches. [01:14:11] Speaker A: I will say, though, as an American, like, if it happened now or, like, if. If we Knew, like, in 1941 when we went to war, it would you. I would be like, yo, sign me up. Sign. [01:14:21] Speaker B: You're too old. You're too old. [01:14:23] Speaker A: I was 18, though. If I was 18, 20, even. If I am, too. At that point, they needed everybody. [01:14:27] Speaker B: Yeah. [01:14:27] Speaker A: I would be like, yo, I'm going, this is a good cause. This is for a good reason. [01:14:31] Speaker B: I would have helped in the war effort. [01:14:32] Speaker A: Yeah. Like, but now. I say now, like, dude, think of twice. I mean, if we were bombed, I. [01:14:37] Speaker D: Would never go to war now. Because now it just feels like it's all just motivated by money. It's just dumb decisions. [01:14:42] Speaker B: You know what? Sick dude? Drone warfare. Speaking of my Instagram. [01:14:47] Speaker A: Attacks. Yeah, it's pretty dope. [01:14:48] Speaker C: Drones. [01:14:49] Speaker B: They also have suicide drones now. Have you seen those? [01:14:51] Speaker A: What do you mean, suicide? [01:14:52] Speaker B: They fly them into people and they blow up. [01:14:54] Speaker A: They're like, oh, but it's not a person that's doing it. It's not real suicide. You're just blowing up the computer. [01:14:58] Speaker B: No, like, they're like, it's a kamikaze drone. Yeah. No, but they're so cheap, dude. [01:15:08] Speaker C: Did you take shrooms? [01:15:09] Speaker A: Cam? [01:15:10] Speaker B: All right, so they launch kamikaze drones at people, right? And they have a camera on them so you can watch, like, Russians be like, oh, fuck. And, like, try to get away. [01:15:20] Speaker A: That's cool. [01:15:21] Speaker D: Imagine once AI starts getting more consciousness, and then it's like, gets to, like, it's a suicide drone. It gets close, he's like, nah, I want to live in, like, a little drone territory. [01:15:32] Speaker C: They lied to me. I want to have sex. [01:15:36] Speaker B: The Russians have dialed in. Like, I think it's an EMP now, where they, like, it's like an electronic pulse, and it knocks the drones out of the sky. [01:15:42] Speaker A: No way. [01:15:42] Speaker B: Yeah. So the Ukrainian solution for this is they've tied their drones on, like, copper wire leashes that are really long. [01:15:47] Speaker A: Justin's dad would love that. [01:15:51] Speaker C: What do you think he's doing right now? I'm supporting the cause. [01:15:56] Speaker A: That's crazy, dude. [01:15:57] Speaker B: That wild. [01:15:57] Speaker A: That's fucking crazy. I don't know, man. This drone war is streaming. It's there. That's. That's the crazy. We're watching the revolution will be televised time. That is the most wild thing. And this. This AI, Dude, I am freaked out. I'm freaked out. I feel like we're just digging our own grave right now. And it's like, kids and then the new generation, they don't even want to fuck. They have no desire to fuck. It's like with the AI is here, it's like we're already turning ourselves into robots. [01:16:24] Speaker B: Yeah. [01:16:25] Speaker D: Do you think the world's heading in a good place or a bad place place? [01:16:27] Speaker C: Bad. [01:16:28] Speaker A: Bad. I don't like it. [01:16:29] Speaker B: I think it's gonna get good after a while, but it's gonna be for the rest of our lives. [01:16:33] Speaker A: I think we got really screwed. I think we came at a weird time. [01:16:35] Speaker B: We did. [01:16:36] Speaker D: Yeah, we did. [01:16:37] Speaker C: I don't think that human beings sit. [01:16:38] Speaker A: On the couch, drinking and doing mushrooms, like, yeah, what else are we supposed to do? It's a fun time. [01:16:45] Speaker D: We don't know what we're doing. Yeah, we certainly don't know what we're doing. [01:16:47] Speaker C: I just don't think human beings know how to, like, handle technology. [01:16:51] Speaker A: I think we think we do. That's the problem. Yeah. [01:16:53] Speaker B: I think we're gonna learn a lot after we demolish our current society. The survivors are gonna be like, we need this better. [01:16:59] Speaker C: What are you, Ultron. [01:17:01] Speaker D: Do you think there'll ever be a revolution in any of our Western countries? [01:17:05] Speaker B: I don't know if it's possible anymore. [01:17:06] Speaker A: I don't know if it is either. [01:17:08] Speaker C: Yeah. [01:17:08] Speaker A: With the drone and everything. Imagine us trying to, like, take up arms, like, all right, we'll blow up that part of the city. [01:17:12] Speaker D: You certainly don't. You certainly couldn't outpower, like, modern ind. Modern militaries now. [01:17:17] Speaker C: There's definitely a contingency of people in the United States that Think they're like, there's a revolution. [01:17:23] Speaker A: If it was fought with like, like a, like the old war, like with just guns. And we would do. There's more guns in this country that belong to citizens than the entire army. I feel like. [01:17:32] Speaker B: Can you talk about how we would realistically topple the United States government? Or is that not a good. [01:17:36] Speaker A: No, I love that. [01:17:39] Speaker B: I don't have a plan or anything. I just think. [01:17:40] Speaker A: I don't want to take down the government. I like this government. It's just. They have. [01:17:43] Speaker B: But if you had to. All right, we don't. No one wants to take down the. [01:17:45] Speaker A: I like democracy. I should say. [01:17:46] Speaker B: Yeah, but if we were going to take it down. [01:17:48] Speaker A: If we were, I mean, how would you do? Storm the Capitol? [01:17:52] Speaker B: That didn't work. [01:17:53] Speaker A: That didn't work at all. [01:17:54] Speaker B: Killing the president wouldn't work because they just replace them. [01:17:57] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:17:58] Speaker D: I think the only way you could do it is just be non compliant. Like everyone. Everyone would have to band together. [01:18:03] Speaker A: Yeah. And we'd also need guns. [01:18:05] Speaker D: Yes. Literally stop going to work. [01:18:06] Speaker A: You also. [01:18:07] Speaker D: That would be the quickest way to get the attention of everyone. [01:18:09] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:18:10] Speaker D: Just go. No, we're not doing anything. You can, you can put tanks down the street in military, but we're not going to work. [01:18:15] Speaker C: Well, not just that, but also you'd have to get rid of the phones. [01:18:18] Speaker A: You'd have to go completely have to go off the grid. [01:18:20] Speaker C: Like it would have to be a full guerrilla warfare or you'd have to. [01:18:24] Speaker A: Learn how to code and then take it out. Like the people do. Like shut down the grid. Like anonymous hackers. Yeah. [01:18:29] Speaker B: You need to either have like, oh, dude, you know, China's got everything held hostage. Speaking of which. What do you mean, dude, they're in all the infrastructure code in where? [01:18:38] Speaker A: In China? [01:18:38] Speaker B: No, here. [01:18:39] Speaker A: What? [01:18:39] Speaker B: Yeah, I swear to God. They're in like they, they. They've infiltrated the code that controls like our water systems, our electricity system. [01:18:46] Speaker A: What are they doing? [01:18:47] Speaker B: Nothing. Right now. [01:18:48] Speaker D: All the technology comes out of China. That's why. [01:18:50] Speaker B: But the point is China, China could turn off the electricity in this country with a click of a button. [01:18:56] Speaker A: That would suck. [01:18:57] Speaker B: And we can't do about it. [01:18:59] Speaker A: You know what I do at that point? [01:19:00] Speaker B: What? [01:19:01] Speaker A: Mmr. Just meditate and refucking. That's it. Just repeat. [01:19:07] Speaker B: Cam's unaffected. Drops right to the ground. [01:19:10] Speaker A: Starts clenching his at that point. [01:19:18] Speaker B: I love you, bud. [01:19:21] Speaker A: I'm pretty lit. [01:19:23] Speaker B: Yeah. [01:19:24] Speaker A: What do you got? Yeah, let's do the beach. I do want. I want to have one I want a question. When Joe gets back, though, I want to know what we can name this because this would be fun to do again. I mean, this is very Joe Rogan of, like, Protect our Parks. I don't want to do that. But, like, what would be the name? Is this Precom? [01:19:39] Speaker B: Is this the name of the episode? [01:19:40] Speaker A: Well, every episode will. Now, if we. When we do four of us together, we'll be that, you know, stealing it from the. The great. The great Joe Rogan. [01:19:48] Speaker B: What does he do? [01:19:49] Speaker A: He does protect our parks. Like, when it's Mark Norman, Shane Gillis, Ari Shafir. [01:19:53] Speaker D: What about Protect our Precom? [01:19:55] Speaker A: No, that's a good one. [01:19:56] Speaker B: I don't want to do a Rogan knockoff name. [01:19:59] Speaker A: It's not a knockoff. Yeah, okay. Yeah, I know what you mean. The orgy is this. Maybe this is, like, gorgy. I don't know. [01:20:07] Speaker B: It'll come to us. We'll come to us. [01:20:08] Speaker A: I'm gonna have to come up with something because I gotta release this this week. [01:20:10] Speaker B: It'll come to us. [01:20:12] Speaker A: All right. [01:20:13] Speaker B: I believe. Have faith in the system. [01:20:15] Speaker A: All right. [01:20:15] Speaker B: Have faith. [01:20:16] Speaker A: What do you think, Cam? You look like you're brewing. [01:20:19] Speaker D: I'm just trying to figure out if this smells like Como shit. [01:20:26] Speaker A: That Mike is the one with the shit. [01:20:28] Speaker B: I told you I have the come mic. How many times do I have to go over this? [01:20:32] Speaker A: The ones that Joe and I have are brand new. All right, Joe, what do you think we should name? I'm trying to, because we're going to cut this in a second. You look so high, dude. What do you think we should name this podcast? Because I got to release it this week. Yeah. So that whenever we do this for all four of us, like. Like how. Protect our parks for crew called. [01:20:52] Speaker B: What do we call our crew? [01:20:53] Speaker A: Yeah, what is it? [01:20:54] Speaker C: Pre com. [01:20:55] Speaker B: Like a warriors, like gang name? [01:20:58] Speaker A: What was, like, the basic theme of this one? [01:20:59] Speaker B: Do we know There's a lot of nut. We're talking a lot about nut. [01:21:03] Speaker A: What? I don't know. [01:21:04] Speaker B: You tried to talk about love. [01:21:05] Speaker A: Yeah. That was big. [01:21:06] Speaker B: We transitioned immediately to the fall of the US Government. [01:21:10] Speaker C: I feel like. [01:21:11] Speaker B: I feel like this is Sandinistas. You have. [01:21:13] Speaker C: I. I think that you've branded the podcast so well, because chaos and clarity, it just. It really. This is the chaos part of it. [01:21:21] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:21:21] Speaker C: And then there's the clarity, which is like you having one on one or you having sort of like the monologue. [01:21:27] Speaker B: We're bringing the chaos. [01:21:28] Speaker C: This is the chaos. [01:21:29] Speaker D: Yeah. [01:21:29] Speaker A: So then this is. It's this. Do we just call this the Chaos Crew? I don't. Chaos Crew. I like that. Yeah, that's kind of gay, but I do it. [01:21:36] Speaker B: I. [01:21:36] Speaker A: You don't like it? [01:21:37] Speaker B: No, no, no, I love it. [01:21:38] Speaker D: We'll see. [01:21:38] Speaker B: It's great. [01:21:39] Speaker C: We could call. Why don't we call ourselves the Proud Boys? [01:21:42] Speaker A: Oh, that would be dope. Or the Proud Girls, maybe. Yeah, I like that. [01:21:47] Speaker B: The Proud, Proud Girls. [01:21:48] Speaker A: Okay, that's good. [01:21:50] Speaker C: Proud Girls. Proud Girls. [01:21:53] Speaker A: Episode 1 Sugar Spice Everything Thing 1, 2, 3, 4, 5. [01:21:57] Speaker C: God, I love you, Harrison. [01:22:01] Speaker A: The Proud Girls. All right. [01:22:02] Speaker B: Sugar, Spice Everything. Nice. [01:22:04] Speaker A: I love this. [01:22:05] Speaker D: Mmr. [01:22:05] Speaker A: Mmr. That's another good one. Mmr. [01:22:08] Speaker C: I feel like. No, no, if you're going to go that way, it's like sugar Spice everything. Nice. And then I'm Mojo Jojo, the evil monkey. [01:22:14] Speaker B: Oh, yeah. That is good, actually. [01:22:16] Speaker A: Just everything. You think that's what he was trying? All right, whatever we're getting, he was definitely a pedophile. 100%. [01:22:21] Speaker B: Why are we stopping the podcast? I just got drunk. [01:22:23] Speaker A: I'm down to keep going. [01:22:24] Speaker C: I mean, what about. But the beef? [01:22:27] Speaker A: 15 minutes. [01:22:27] Speaker B: I do like. [01:22:28] Speaker A: What time is it? [01:22:29] Speaker C: 1:30 now. [01:22:30] Speaker A: All right, five minutes and then we're done. [01:22:32] Speaker D: What do you want to talk about then? [01:22:33] Speaker A: I don't know, Just. Eli's up now. Should we talk about, like, our relationship statuses or. No. [01:22:38] Speaker B: Oh, God, no. [01:22:38] Speaker A: Eli, you don't want to. [01:22:39] Speaker B: Actually, no, we can. We can. [01:22:40] Speaker A: I'm curious. [01:22:41] Speaker B: How you feeling, dude? Every day is up and down. Honestly. [01:22:44] Speaker A: Up and down. Yeah. Yeah. A little bit of a roller coaster. [01:22:46] Speaker B: A little bit of a roller coaster. But no, I feel. I feel good about where I'm at. [01:22:51] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:22:51] Speaker B: Overall. [01:22:51] Speaker A: Okay, good. [01:22:52] Speaker B: Yeah. The life I'm leading right now. [01:22:55] Speaker C: Yeah. [01:22:55] Speaker A: How is your life, dude? [01:22:56] Speaker B: It's so weird and fun. [01:22:57] Speaker A: What are you doing? [01:22:58] Speaker B: I like. All right, so yesterday I did a set at the stand. [01:23:03] Speaker A: Okay. [01:23:04] Speaker B: And then I went to St. Mark's yeah. Saw camper a bit. [01:23:07] Speaker A: Okay. [01:23:07] Speaker B: And then I walked back to the stand, did another set at a show which fucking. I killed, dude. It went so well. [01:23:15] Speaker A: Nice. [01:23:15] Speaker B: And then I walked to go see Lizzie's show at Soho Playhouse. And on my way there, I went through Washington Square park and I played three homeless dudes at chess, and I beat all three of them. I was undefeated in Washington Square park yesterday. [01:23:29] Speaker A: That's hard because those guys are good. [01:23:30] Speaker B: I'm better. Did you take any money? [01:23:33] Speaker C: Did you take any money from them? [01:23:34] Speaker A: No. [01:23:35] Speaker B: The first game, I didn't have any money. So the first Game I played, I was like, hey, dude, I don't have any money. Can I still play? And he was like, normally I charge, but yeah, whatever. And then I whooped his ass. [01:23:42] Speaker D: How quick? [01:23:43] Speaker B: I think we played like a 20 move game. So like. Like not like a pretty dominant game. And then his buddy saw I was like, do me. So then I played him and I beat him. And that game got to an end game, so it was more competitive. [01:23:55] Speaker A: What were the ethnicity of these gentlemen? [01:23:57] Speaker B: White, Black. Black. [01:23:58] Speaker A: And you beat the white guy? [01:23:59] Speaker B: Beat the white guy first, yeah. [01:24:01] Speaker A: Really? And then you beat the black guys. [01:24:02] Speaker B: And I'd be two black guys. [01:24:03] Speaker A: I was expecting it the other way around. [01:24:06] Speaker B: The white guy, he was like a prison white, though. [01:24:07] Speaker A: Oh, Aryan brotherhood. [01:24:09] Speaker B: Well, just like, you know, the grimy, you know, no sleeves, older, missing a couple teeth. Yeah, good dude. Prison white. [01:24:16] Speaker A: Crack. [01:24:17] Speaker B: Crackhead energy. Not. Not terrible. [01:24:19] Speaker C: But. But in. In, like the chat, like the park chests, hierarchy, you definitely went like, up a level. [01:24:26] Speaker B: Yeah. [01:24:27] Speaker C: And then, like, there is black dudes in the park. [01:24:30] Speaker B: Yeah. [01:24:30] Speaker C: That play chess all day. That's like fucking. [01:24:33] Speaker A: They're no joke. [01:24:33] Speaker B: Yeah, well, there is a. There is a hierarchy. [01:24:36] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:24:36] Speaker B: And I didn't make it to the top echelon because I had to keep moving. I had to go to the show. [01:24:41] Speaker A: Who's the final boss? [01:24:42] Speaker B: I don't know. But he's like, if you work your way around the circle, I think you eventually find him. Which I will do at some point. [01:24:48] Speaker A: Yeah, but. [01:24:49] Speaker B: So I beat three dudes at chess and I went and watched the show. [01:24:53] Speaker A: Okay. And then where's the weirdness? Like, what kind of weird life you. [01:24:57] Speaker B: Live in playing chess of homeless people? [01:24:58] Speaker A: I mean, that, I guess. I don't know. In New York, that seems so normal. [01:25:01] Speaker B: Yeah, I guess so. And then I got. [01:25:02] Speaker C: Yeah, I feel like you're just kind of soaking in the culture. [01:25:04] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:25:05] Speaker B: Yeah, I know, but I'm just having fun. [01:25:06] Speaker A: Fun. That's good. That's best. Dude. When you're just like. You don't know what's. Like, you're kind of in limbo in a certain way emotionally and then. But you're just living your life and you're taking things as they come. I think that's the best part. You just. There's a sense of it, like, when things are going, like, obviously sometimes things go wrong and you don't want it, but there's a sense of. Of real empowerment, of like, I don't know what's gonna happen tomorrow. I don't know how I'm Gonna feel. And right now I feel good at times. I feel bad at times. But. But, hey, like, there's. There's an excitement as much as there is a sadness. Does that make any sense? [01:25:37] Speaker B: Yeah. No, it does. And just, like, living it. Living through it. [01:25:39] Speaker A: Yeah. You just go, all right, I'm gonna work through these emotions and. [01:25:41] Speaker B: Yeah. [01:25:42] Speaker A: And we'll see where we end. [01:25:43] Speaker C: Honestly, Very freeing. [01:25:44] Speaker A: It is. [01:25:44] Speaker B: It took me a lot to get here. [01:25:46] Speaker A: It does. Like. [01:25:47] Speaker B: Or to get to New York City. I mean. [01:25:48] Speaker A: Oh. [01:25:49] Speaker B: To physically get here and start doing comedy. [01:25:52] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:25:52] Speaker B: Took me a lot. [01:25:53] Speaker A: I believe it. [01:25:54] Speaker B: And there was, like, a. There's a lot of sacrifice. [01:25:55] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:25:56] Speaker B: You know, but now I'm here and I'm doing it. I'm doing what I always wanted to be doing. And, like, it's fucking weird and fun. [01:26:02] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:26:03] Speaker B: And, like, my job doesn't matter. It's hilarious. [01:26:05] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:26:05] Speaker B: Like, I just go to work and do nothing all day for it. That's insane. [01:26:09] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:26:10] Speaker B: And then I go do comedy and get drunk at night. This is a weird lifestyle. [01:26:14] Speaker A: It's. [01:26:14] Speaker B: But it's the one I want. [01:26:15] Speaker C: It's definitely alternative. [01:26:16] Speaker B: Yeah. It's the one I wanted, so I'm glad that I get to live it. Yeah. [01:26:21] Speaker A: I got a question for all you now, because I'm the only one here from New York. Like, you were talking about sacrifice. Like, you guys all had to. Really. I'm very fortunate. I didn't have to sacrifice shit. You guys came here and had to fucking figure this shit out. And, like, what is. What are some of the things you had to give up, Cam. [01:26:40] Speaker D: Well, my. My life is completely different now. [01:26:42] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:26:43] Speaker D: I don't do anything that's the same. [01:26:44] Speaker A: Yeah. So how do you feel about that? [01:26:46] Speaker D: Yeah, I miss. I miss my old life. [01:26:48] Speaker A: You do? [01:26:48] Speaker D: Yeah. I miss. [01:26:49] Speaker A: Like, this sucks. [01:26:53] Speaker C: I would go back. [01:26:55] Speaker A: Like, I can't afford to go back. That's the problem. [01:26:57] Speaker B: What not to. I read this book recently called Fraction of a Hole, and it was based in Australia, and it was the funniest book I've ever read. [01:27:05] Speaker D: That's awesome. [01:27:05] Speaker B: I'm gonna give it to you later. [01:27:06] Speaker D: Okay. I love that. No, but I love New York. I love what I'm doing. I'm finally. I have no doubt in my mind that I'm following, like, a true path, which is cool. I don't know where it's going to go, which is also cool. [01:27:17] Speaker A: It's exciting. [01:27:17] Speaker D: None of us know what's going to happen or how successful we're going to be or how well we're going to develop, and the unknown and moving into the unknown is, like, kind of a really cool thing to start accepting at this stage of life. So I'm stoked. I'm happy. I do really miss home. I miss my family. Like, on the weekend, I had, like, missed calls from one of my sisters and then her husband and then one of her. One of her friends because they're all trying to call me. And I messaged him the next day. I was like, what's going on? I miss your calls. And they're like, oh, no. We just. We just all want to just, like, see your face and hear your voice. [01:27:49] Speaker B: Do we need to invent teleportation? [01:27:51] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:27:52] Speaker B: It's insane. [01:27:52] Speaker D: I miss. I miss my family a lot. [01:27:54] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:27:54] Speaker D: Yeah. [01:27:54] Speaker A: But it can't be easy, man. [01:27:56] Speaker C: Yeah, you're another world away. [01:27:57] Speaker D: Yeah. [01:27:57] Speaker A: Yeah, you're. You came the furthest. I mean, you are literally around the other side of the globe. Yeah, that's it, dude. It takes balls, man. It takes balls. What about. What about you, Joe? How. How fucking different is your life? What'd you have to give up? [01:28:11] Speaker C: I mean, definitely the. The immediacy of having your family there. It's tough, but I think comfort, just, like. Because if I kept living in Arizona, like, I could have a very comfortable life, you know? But moving out here, it's like. It's so rough. Like. Yeah. First you have to downgrade in, like, just your. Your living quarters. And then. Yeah. Wrapping your mind around, like, okay, I'm gonna. I'm gonna work paycheck to paycheck and then try to do this thing that. That there really is no promise that it's all going to work out. So it's like that the ambiguity of your future is either very daunting or very exciting. And some days it's very scary, and other days it's like, oh, this is awesome. [01:28:53] Speaker B: How much do you miss yards, by the way? [01:28:55] Speaker C: Yards? So much, dude. I. I miss. I miss pissing outside. [01:29:01] Speaker B: Oh, dude, like, pissing outside so much and. [01:29:04] Speaker C: And not having to worry about people walking around. [01:29:07] Speaker B: It was so much better in New Hampshire due to piss outside. You could just fucking whatever you were doing, dude, you were not far away. [01:29:11] Speaker C: Yeah. [01:29:12] Speaker B: From a piss spot. [01:29:13] Speaker C: There's always a tree, right? [01:29:14] Speaker B: There's always a tree. [01:29:15] Speaker C: Like, here in New York, like, you have to really go in, like, a back alleyway to get, like, some privacy. And even then, it's like. [01:29:20] Speaker A: Or you could just pretend that you're on heroin and piss and no one's gonna Stop you if you want those guys. Yeah, you just lean over. [01:29:26] Speaker B: Yesterday when I was getting on the train, this kid, like, I was sitting in the benches and this kid walked like too close by me. And that was the first time I was like, oh, fuck. Like, what the fuck's up with this guy? And then he peed also. It was like I was on my way to the stand. So it was like 1pm oh, middle of the day. Yeah. And he peed like behind one of the subway trash cans. [01:29:45] Speaker A: Okay. [01:29:46] Speaker B: And because he like walked in front of me and his whole. Anyways, at 1pm I was like, just watching him do it. [01:29:51] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:29:52] Speaker B: Like not being subtle about it. I was just like looking at him. I was like, that's fucking crazy. And then, dude, he turned around and made direct eye contact contact with me and held it as he peed. [01:30:00] Speaker D: He was like, that's hot. [01:30:04] Speaker B: It was honestly terrifying. I was like, this kid's gonna shake me. [01:30:07] Speaker C: That's a guy that doesn't pre come. [01:30:08] Speaker B: To add to it. To add to it. On his way out, he asked someone else for directions. [01:30:12] Speaker C: Nice. Like a totally normal person with in hand. [01:30:15] Speaker B: He was just like, hey, how do I get to the F train from here? [01:30:17] Speaker A: I mean, dude is up with people growing up in this city. It's like when you gotta go, you gotta go, man. If sometimes happens, you just like. My dad watched a Dude, you watch dude, the UPS park. The truck gets out of the truck, goes into wherever he's going, and a homeless dude runs inside the truck and takes a out. And my dad watched in real time the UPS driver go walk in the truck. And he goes, oh, what the. That is. That's New York, bro. That is the most New York ever. [01:30:55] Speaker C: Dude, have you ever seen the video? The guy, some guy was. Was like. He's a janitor in the subway station. He's like carrying around a mop bucket. And he looks away for one second and then this homeless guy just starts squatting over. And the guy goes, no, no. And the homeless guy goes, yeah, yeah. And he just takes a. [01:31:12] Speaker A: In the mucket. That's a good one. Famous though. I know that dude. I see him all the time. That homeless dude, everyone knows who he is, is. He's a nut, but he's hysterical. He's all over the Internet. That's awesome. I had someone from Chicago send me a video of this guy. And I'm like, I know who this is, dude. [01:31:24] Speaker C: If you can make it in New York, you can make it anywhere. [01:31:26] Speaker B: That's right. [01:31:27] Speaker C: Even the Homeless people. [01:31:28] Speaker A: Speaking of homeless, whatever happened to Danny, the homeless magician? [01:31:31] Speaker B: Oh, he went west. That's the last. [01:31:33] Speaker A: He went west, dude. [01:31:34] Speaker B: Yeah. [01:31:35] Speaker A: So. [01:31:37] Speaker C: He hit the old dusty trail. [01:31:41] Speaker B: You guys know Ben Gold? [01:31:42] Speaker A: I love Ben. [01:31:43] Speaker B: Yeah, he came up to me at the Pair, and he was like, I think I just met your homeless house magician. [01:31:47] Speaker A: No way. [01:31:48] Speaker B: And first of all, I was like, thanks for calling him my homeless house. [01:31:50] Speaker A: Magician, because he is yours. [01:31:51] Speaker B: He's mine. [01:31:52] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:31:52] Speaker B: But he comes up to me and he's like, I think I just met your homeless house magician. I was like, oh, shit, where's he at? And he was like, yeah, I saw him out there, and he said he might come to the Pair, but if he doesn't, he said to let me know that he's going west. [01:32:07] Speaker A: West to, like, the west side of Manhattan? [01:32:09] Speaker B: No, that's literally, you know, everything I know now. [01:32:14] Speaker C: That's so awesome. Awesome. [01:32:16] Speaker B: Yeah, he said to tell me that he's going west. [01:32:18] Speaker C: Imagine. Imagine just walking up. Imagine just walking up to anybody, Anybody in New York and being like, hey, tell Eli I'm going west. [01:32:28] Speaker A: Just walking. [01:32:28] Speaker B: I haven't seen him since. I hope. Danny. I'm shouting. I've shouted out Danny on a lot of podcasts. Danny, I hope you're well. If you've gone west, please return to the east, because we would like to have you back on the mic. [01:32:40] Speaker A: We met him at Yurik. [01:32:41] Speaker B: Yeah, we did. [01:32:42] Speaker A: A year ago. I have pictures with him from a year ago. It's. It's insane. [01:32:45] Speaker B: You know, he came back to the mic. I don't remember if you were there. [01:32:47] Speaker A: He got thrown out once because he was drinking. I bought it. [01:32:49] Speaker B: And then he died. Yeah. And then he dyed his hair green and came back like, it was sick, dude. And he. He did five minutes. He went way over the light. [01:32:58] Speaker D: Yeah. [01:32:58] Speaker B: And then we let him close the show, and he did another, like, 20 at the end of the show, and it was great. [01:33:02] Speaker C: Okay, I'm glad, because one time, I remember I was hosting, and you were like, dude, please let Danny. [01:33:06] Speaker D: Or what. [01:33:07] Speaker C: What his name? [01:33:07] Speaker B: Yeah, I was trying to get him on, and you were like, no. [01:33:09] Speaker C: I was like, no, we can't do that. And you're like, please do. It'll be so funny. And I was like, eli, no, you. [01:33:14] Speaker B: Wanted to go home. [01:33:15] Speaker C: This wouldn't. This. This wouldn't be a good idea. Yeah, and then. [01:33:18] Speaker B: But then I took over the mic and I was like, it's my mic now we're putting homeless people on. [01:33:22] Speaker C: You gotta breathe some. Breathe some life. [01:33:24] Speaker A: He's actually quite funny. [01:33:26] Speaker B: He's pretty good. [01:33:26] Speaker C: I bet he is. I bet he is. But, like, at 10pm at. Probably at 10pm it's the perfect place. But also, like. Like, yeah, if he's running the light and. [01:33:35] Speaker B: Oh, yeah, big time. [01:33:36] Speaker A: He's also a great magician. [01:33:37] Speaker B: He's a really good magician. [01:33:39] Speaker A: Really. [01:33:39] Speaker B: He has no sense of time, though. [01:33:40] Speaker D: I appreciate homeless people with a skill. [01:33:42] Speaker A: Yes. [01:33:43] Speaker D: Like, I don't like giving you, like, just standard beggars. [01:33:46] Speaker A: Dance for your dollar. [01:33:47] Speaker D: Dancing like, they're doing the flips in the train. I always give him money. [01:33:50] Speaker C: I will say this. [01:33:51] Speaker A: They're not homeless. They're just black. Dude. [01:33:54] Speaker C: I saw a guy on the train a few weeks maybe, like, last week actually, and he was on the train with his son, and he was like. He gave this speech to the crow. To the car. No, but it was like, usually I do too, but it was so profound and, like, it was so. It was so powerful and moving that I was like, I gave him as much money as I had. [01:34:17] Speaker A: What was the speech? [01:34:18] Speaker C: He was just like, hey, you know, we've been homeless for a few weeks. We just need some. Some money for food. It's not for me. It's for my son. He was probably using. His son is like, you know, dude. [01:34:28] Speaker A: That'S a monologue from the Pursuit of. [01:34:29] Speaker C: Happiness is, yeah, bro, but, bro, he dialed. He locked in. And it was so like. [01:34:35] Speaker A: But you could not. You'd be a hardest. [01:34:37] Speaker C: But the skill is that. And as somebody who, like, wants to speak for a living, I was just so moved by this guy's words that. [01:34:44] Speaker B: I was like, this guy's a great. [01:34:46] Speaker C: Take it. [01:34:46] Speaker A: Yeah, take it. You. It's hard not to. So when you see a kid, it's hard when he's like, look, it's not to look at someone in the eye and be like, it's for my kid, dude. Even if it's not real, it's hard not. [01:34:54] Speaker D: I kind of see through it, though. I'm like. Like, yeah. [01:34:56] Speaker B: I just never. [01:34:57] Speaker A: You look at him and you go, I'm starving too. [01:35:00] Speaker B: Also. I'm so. [01:35:01] Speaker C: Every once in a while, you have to have a little bit of humanity. Normally my meter is, like, I can read it very well, but, like, there are a few times where I'm like, they need it more than you, man. [01:35:14] Speaker D: Yeah. [01:35:14] Speaker B: I don't know, man. Like, what do you think the odds are these dudes went to college. I might be in more debt than they are. [01:35:19] Speaker C: It doesn't. It doesn't matter. Like, You. You don't know. And every. Every once in a while. Every once in a while, it is nice to remind you. Remind yourself that, like, hey, yes, this person. There are people that. [01:35:30] Speaker A: Even if they're lying, let me. Let me. Let me have a hard time. [01:35:32] Speaker B: Don't get me wrong. [01:35:34] Speaker C: Especially if they make me money to buy drugs. [01:35:37] Speaker B: If a homeless guy makes me laugh, I'll probably do something nice. Or, like, a few times I've, like, bought sandwiches and like, oh, food. [01:35:43] Speaker A: Food is. Oh, dude. If someone says to me that they want food, I will go into McDonald's and spend a hundred dollars. I swear to God. A food you can have every. What do you want on the menu? I'll buy diet. If it's. If they. If I offer food and they go, no, I want money, then I go, all right, you're a drug addict. But food, I'll never turn. So I never, ever, ever turn them. [01:36:00] Speaker B: Down to Joe's point, though, I don't care if they use it on drugs. If that's what's in their heart and. [01:36:04] Speaker A: Soul, they can do that with my money, I guess. But it's like, if. If I'm in the mood to buy someone food, which is always. I'll do it. And if I'm in the mood to give money, I don't care what. [01:36:10] Speaker D: Okay, So I had this. I witnessed this the other day. I was walking past, like, a chicken shop. Like a fried chicken shop. [01:36:16] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:36:16] Speaker D: And there was a homeless guy at the front. He's like, can you buy me food? Can you buy me food? And I was walking in there anyway, and there was this woman next to me walking the same direction. She goes, yeah, sure, I'll buy you food. They get to the counter. [01:36:28] Speaker A: I can't wait to hear. [01:36:29] Speaker D: And this guy goes. She goes, what do you want? He goes, I'll take 30 pieces of chicken. I'll take. [01:36:37] Speaker A: Oh, whoa, whoa, French. [01:36:38] Speaker D: And this. You could see this girl's eyes just go. She was Asian, and her eyes went. [01:36:44] Speaker B: They do abuse it. They do. Abusing. [01:36:46] Speaker A: No, but my. My dad. I grew up, my dad doing that with the homeless people. He would. He would be like, I'll get you double. Like, whatever. Like, at that point, it's. It's like, yo, they gotta eat. Yeah. You know, it's all right if I'm spending 100. Like, it sucks that they would take. They're not taking advantage, but they are. You know what I'm saying? [01:37:01] Speaker C: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You give. [01:37:03] Speaker A: It's like, it. All right, you want 100 chicken nuggets. Let's get 100. [01:37:06] Speaker C: This is why you're homeless. [01:37:08] Speaker D: He's also it for the next guy because you think she's gonna go buy a homeless guy food again? [01:37:12] Speaker A: No. [01:37:12] Speaker B: Have you guys ever seen chips from the deli? [01:37:14] Speaker A: Like, listen, you cheap bastard, Two cheeseburgers. [01:37:17] Speaker B: Some guy asked me to buy him chips, and I said I would. And then he just scooped up so many Haribo gummies in his arms. [01:37:23] Speaker D: How? [01:37:23] Speaker B: Like, he scooped up. [01:37:24] Speaker C: I mean, I would do that, too. [01:37:25] Speaker D: If I was you, and you would have hated that. [01:37:27] Speaker B: Yeah. But I did it. I was like, you want a bunch of Haribo gummies? [01:37:30] Speaker C: Yeah, dude. [01:37:32] Speaker B: That's yours, buddy. [01:37:33] Speaker C: If I was homeless and Harrison's dad was like, dude, I'll buy you whatever you want, I would go in there and I'd like, I want that. I want that. [01:37:38] Speaker D: I want that. [01:37:38] Speaker A: I want that. [01:37:39] Speaker C: I want that. Like, go all out, dude. [01:37:41] Speaker A: Well, a lot of the times also, that's the mistake. Here's. That's the. That's the problem. You don't bring them inside. You go, I'll get you something to eat. What are you in the mood for? [01:37:48] Speaker B: That's a pro move. [01:37:49] Speaker A: That's who you go. [01:37:51] Speaker C: Beggars can't be choosers. [01:37:52] Speaker A: Yeah. And my dad will get them triple of whatever they want. Like, I would love a cheeseburger. And he'll get the large cheeseburger and three meals of that. And then you don't bring them. You don't even. First of all. To be seen with something like, I. What are you. Like, what is. It's like walking into a fucking restaurant with. What do you want, sweetie? And my buddy here, Toothless Dan, he's a magician. Yeah. [01:38:15] Speaker C: He's gonna make these burgers disappear. [01:38:18] Speaker B: Ever tell you guys about Henrietta Mac? [01:38:21] Speaker A: Henrietta Mac. [01:38:22] Speaker B: She was this homeless woman. [01:38:23] Speaker A: You've mentioned this, I think. To me. [01:38:25] Speaker B: Yeah. She was this homeless woman who came up to me sitting outside a bar. [01:38:28] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:38:28] Speaker B: And she just walked up to the table. She goes, my name is Henrietta Mack. [01:38:32] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:38:32] Speaker B: And I was like, no, it's not. And then she was like, yeah, that's my name. I'm Henrietta Mack. I made her show id. [01:38:37] Speaker A: She had an id. [01:38:38] Speaker B: Yeah. Her name was Henrietta Mack. [01:38:40] Speaker A: Dude, that's pretty dope. I gave her five bucks because she was Henrietta Mac. Yeah. [01:38:44] Speaker C: Any relation to the. [01:38:45] Speaker A: Great. [01:38:46] Speaker C: So you won't give a child $5, but you will give Henrietta Mac? [01:38:50] Speaker B: Yeah. That was hilarious. She walked right up to my table. She was like, I'm Henrietta Mack. And I was like, no, you're not. She's like, that's my name. And I was like, I know. [01:38:59] Speaker C: They call me big Mama. [01:39:02] Speaker B: She was awesome, dude. [01:39:03] Speaker A: I mean, there's nothing like a. There's nothing like. There's nobody more charming than a fat black woman. There just isn't. I went to a fat black woman's house the other day to clean her carpet, dude. And this woman just. Oh. And obviously she owned the space because she lived there. But she had this, like. She gave me some instructions of where to plug the machine in, and I didn't follow them properly. [01:39:22] Speaker C: She was. [01:39:23] Speaker A: Did not tell you where to plug the machine in. And I looked. I was like, you're right. I'm fucking sorry. Like I said, there's a sense of just like. There's like. She's like, oh. She's like my mom. Like, very honest. Yeah. There was no. And I really love that. And they're always charming and fun and they're down a joke. And if you go too far, they'll be, listen, bitch. Like, you know you're talking to right now. I'm like, oh, my bad. You know? But they don't take offense a lot. That's what I love about them. [01:39:44] Speaker C: Yeah. My dad, he lived in D.C. in the 80s and he would go to this. He would go to this black owned restaurant. [01:39:50] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:39:50] Speaker C: And like the maitre d there, she was this big black woman. Like big mama, basically. [01:39:55] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:39:55] Speaker C: And when he would order, he would order like, whatever it was. And then he would ask, like, for the extra hot sauce. And she'd like, white boys can't handle that hot sauce. [01:40:04] Speaker A: Yeah, dude, they're funny. [01:40:06] Speaker C: Try me. And then she would bring it over to him. He tried and he's like, I'm wiping sweat off my brow, you know, I'm drenched. And I never let her see it. But it's like, they do have, like. [01:40:17] Speaker A: They have charm. They do. Yeah. It's. It's. Yeah. [01:40:22] Speaker B: Should all be as charming as fat black women. [01:40:24] Speaker A: Fat black women. Yeah. Older too. I actually. My buddy took a picture with a homeless black woman yesterday. She looked just like fucking Dave Chappelle. It was. Boggled my mind. She had the fucking eyes, dude. It was crazy. She also kind of looked like Frederick Douglass, but not many people. [01:40:45] Speaker B: They don't all look alike, Harrison. [01:40:49] Speaker A: They don't. Oh, God, dude, I'm getting worse. All right, should we cut this? Let's do it. [01:40:56] Speaker C: I want to take a shot and then go to the beach. [01:40:58] Speaker A: All right, guys, this was the proud girls. Thank you so much. Everything. You guys, seriously. Thank you. [01:41:07] Speaker B: The monkey. [01:41:08] Speaker A: This was so much fun. This was so much great. [01:41:10] Speaker D: A lot of fun. [01:41:11] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:41:11] Speaker D: Thank you. [01:41:11] Speaker C: This could have been a really bad idea, but it was great. [01:41:13] Speaker A: It was the best idea. I haven't felt this good in a long time. I. I needed this. I needed this. Thank you. All right, bye.